.Invisible.To.One's.Eye.

Hello.

2011-12-16T21:22:00.006+08:00

It's been a long while now isn't it? :)

Even my cbox is filled with advertisements. LOL.

How's everyone doing?

I'm doing just fine! I love my life a whole lot right now.

It's almost end of the year, so I thought I'd update a wee bit about my life right now.

I'm working. In case if you'd like to know, well now you know. :)

And then everytime, as I bump into friends, they'd ask me the same question, every single time, it never gets bored for them. I honestly don't know why. LOL.

'Working? Dont you plan to study and all? At all'

Erm, I hope you guys don't mind but, please, stop asking me that question anymore, please? Because I get frustrated about it real easily. LOL. It's like the topic of the day, everytime. I'm not joking. It's like everytime, I meet a friend, they come to me, and asked that same question all over again, it's like someone hit the loop button. LOL. I get all awkward, frustrated, conversation doesnt last long, goes in awkward silence. Asking me that question is like asking me if I'm constipated. LOL. D:>

Maybe ask me about questions if I'm doing fine? Have I eaten? What am I doing right now? Though that question tends to lead to the above statement. LOLOL. OTL;;

I enjoy my life alot right now, sure, it's hard working but, I've made great friends while working, I'm happy working. Like, really really happy. I don't feel lonely at all. It makes me happy. :)

Back in High School, every weekends was my getaway. Friday nights, was my getaway. I hated Mondays. Because it means I have to go to school. Not in a sense I hated anyone in school, nor did I not like to stay in school, but because the years I've spent in High School, was in pure depression. I felt lonely. No one was there for me. My friends weren't true with me. They boycotted me (I'm not sure if you guys remembered that post, was hella long ago. LOL.).

The process that I have to go through school was, terrible. I felt depressed, and lonely in so many ways I can't explain.

Now working, I actually felt a WHOLE lot happier. I can actually be, well, me. :)

Not saying I'm not me while I'm hanging out with my friends but, you get the idea. 8D;; /shot.

And no, I did not say anything about not studying. LOL. I do plan to study actually, just not entirely sure which course I should be going to, just yet, I don't want to force myself into things. I dont want to regret.

My friends told me well, to try, but what I think, once you've actually TRIED it, you can't go back. It's like a drug. Once you've started, you can't turn back. Well you can but it'll cost a whole lot of money. Stop a course, you're wasting thousands, might as well just go on, no? I don't want that.

I want to do things that I will NOT regret, not now, not in the future, not ever. I'd like to live my life to the fullest.

Sometimes it frustrates me how everyone's reminding me about, okay I'll cut it short, everything money-related.

'Oh if you keep on working like this, you're not going to live a happy life. You're going to be stuck here, working like a cow, and you're still not going to earn much.'

'C'mon, study this! When you go out and work with this course, and when you're hit with a big project, you can actually earn a whole lot!'

I'm sorry to say, but, I'm not money-minded.

My colleagues were a bit shocked when I said I'm not working for the money. ~~Actually I was forced to work but let's skip that. LOLOL. /shot.~~

And then I started thinking, am I weird? No, not at all. I just enjoy my life, alot more than most people do. That's what I'd like to believe.

Call me a fool. But I did not regret the choices I've made.

I think it's because with the people I'm surrounded with, I got a little comfortable working. I'm always looking forward to working everyday.

I got called a workaholic. LOL. OTL;;

Okay enough with that, so that's Chapter One, let's move on to Chapter Two. LOL. /shot.

What am I doing right now 'sides working?

I'm writing music. And recently I've started drawing again. It's refreshing. :)

I've got a handful of written and composed music sitting in my external hard disk, but I've not showed anyone. Just because I dont think I'm ready, just yet. Maybe later?

And well, about my drawing skills, it's funny how I've improved, without drawing for a almost a year, it's funny. LOLOL. It's true what my friends has said about not drawing for a while, your drawing skills goes up a level right after you start drawing again. LOL.

I actually thought of drawing a manga out later, just for ol' times sake. And for the fun of it of course.

Reason why I'm drawing again is because I needed a time out from music writing, I got a little tired, and because not alot of people has heard my songs, I decided I need a time out. Drawing's refreshing.

I wouldn't mind posting up a few songs of mine but your ears will bleed. Trust me. LOL. But do hit me up if you'd like a listen. Don't say I didn't warn you. ;)

And my sense of writing music is weird, not because it's, well, weird, but because I write it differently than most people do, in a way I think?

I write my songs in a guy's point of view, POV for short.

Not because what you think it is. Really. LOL. Because I think writing in a girl's POV, wouldn't be as raw and pure as a guy's POV would be. Well that's what I'd like to think anyway. And I'm being honest.

Maybe it's because I'm inspired by Jason Mraz, John Mayer and etc.

The only female artist I look up to would be YUI. And YUI it'll always be. As most of you might know. ;)

Why YUI? Check her songs out. It's nothing of the norm, maybe it's because Japanese artists tends to write inspirational and motivational songs. LOL. It doesnt emphasize on Love as HEAVILY as most of the American Artists nowadays would.

YUI got me into music, that is why.

Basically, I'm inspired by people who doesn't emphasize so much about Love and Sex in their songs.

I like songs that EXPLAINS what Love is all about.

Not sex, bed, sex, love, sex, and well, more sex, sex, beats, uns uns uns- /shot.

Well yeah, I don't like house music. ROFL. Don't invite me to clubs because I'll reject that invitation. Be warned. LOL. I'll be honest, I hate clubbing. I hate loud techno music. I'm not a fun person when it comes to parties. LOL.

I like simple parties, in someone's house, that has no pole dancing or whatever dancing there may be, cake, Twister! Not forgetting that, games and whatever you might find in a kid's party.

Apparently, it seems I enjoy kiddy parties. Hmm, I'll admit though, I prefer kiddy parties than adult parties. A whole lot. Just because it's not as noisy. Sure kids are noisy but adults are noisier, with beer, wine, noises of someone else puking and what not. Kids laugh loud. That I dont mind. But adults, you get the idea. Guh. ;-;

Call me a kid, because I'll always be one. I may not be a kid physically but hey, I have the mentality of one. ;)

I prefer my beer, water ; My wine, tea.

I'm a cafe/bar that has live music (basically places that has musical instruments) person.

I do like coffee, but I don't drink it occasionally. I LOVE tea though.

Oh! And in case you didn't know. I have 3 guitars and a ukulele. All of them have names. Yes I do name my instruments, mind you. ;)

Coffee the Classical guitar.
Tea the Yamaha Acoustic guitar.
Scones the Farida Acoustic with a Pickup guitar.
Muffin the Anuenue Ukulele!

Im too lazy to name out their model names, ask me up if you'd really like to know. LOL.

I've made new friends while I was writing music. This bunch of people I've met, we all had something in common, we loved music. But definitely all in a different way. There was a few of them who loved music in the same way as I do but let's not go there. LOLOL. This post would be a whole lot longer if I did. <_________>

In case if you're wondering, they're all online friends.

It was the same for art as well. While I was drawing I made friends in the process.

Whatever I was doing, it was definitely fun because, you make friends in the process. LOLOL. /shot.

All in all, that's what has been going through with my life right now.

If there's anything else you'd like to know about me or how I'm doing right now, hit me up! 8D

I might post another post again but it'll take a while. A really long while. LOL.

See you guys soon.

Peace. :)v

Motivation.

2010-08-20T22:40:00.016+08:00

Time to motivate and inspire.

Im banned. Kinda explains it. LOL.

Just to let you guys know Im still alive. I'll probably be gone for a few more months 'till Dec, but who cares, the same goes for you guys anyways. LOL. /shot.

So, have you guys planned anything for the future?

Like what course do you plan to do and stuff.

I've got mine planned out, and things will definitely go well, all I have to do, is believe in myself. :D

First of all...

Well, I wont tell you guys what I'm planning to do, I'll probably tell you guys in the late future. :P

Never told any of my friends too, so that makes it fair!

So all of you guys that will be facing Finals, a.k.a SPM pretty soon, go on a studying spree! No more fooling around!

I wont say much, just a few stuff that I've learn throughout the year, the very year I was once miserable, but was able to stand up on my feet once again.

I've got awesome friends to remind me stuff everytime I'm down, I go to them, tell them about my problems, and well, they cheer me up, gave me really inspiring and motivating quotes, advices, you name them. It really brightens up my day, no joke. 8Db

If it doesnt, well, you're just too engulfed in your own emo world! Get out of the place where it is filled with cloudy skies and rains all day, come out to the sunny side! We've got cookies. 8) /shot.

First off, if your parents somehow stops you from doing something you enjoy, well, dont just stand there, tell them, show them your passion for things, if they dont understand nor would they give you an option or a path to choose, well, it's either you go their way or you go your own way. It's like, would you rather be an obedient spoon-fed pup, or would you rather be a tramp?

I'm not saying you shouldn't obey what your parents might say, it's your choice, your path, your road, your life. If you're like,

'Oh, I'm doing this in order to have my parents to be proud of what I'm doing, I should always go for their opinion.'

Then, what would it be like for you?

Have you ever stopped, wondered, what it'd be like to do something you favor? Something you'd enjoy? Something you'd love to do and wouldn't care if anyone was there to hold you back?

Well, do just that! Go for it!

No one has the rights to tie you down. Not even your parents. Your parents plays the part, the role, where they must understand their children's needs. Yeah, sure, they'll get mad if you do something wrong of the sort, but it never lasts. They love you. They do everything for your own good. Still don't get it?

If you were to chase your dreams, and if they were to destroy it, never give up, it's a way of life, just go for it. As long as something good comes out of it, I say why not! Like I've mentioned, parents will always be by your side, love you, care for you and stuff, no matter what you'd do or what you'd want to be.

To summarise things, rebel. Yes, but for the good, not the bad. Dont be a punk! I mean. Rebel for your dreams if your parents were to say you aren't suitable in stuff like this and should go to this and that instead.

If you have that passion in you, that very intention of doing so, then you're good to go. :)

When there's a will, there's a way.

Never make up excuses, you'll just be pouring more obstacles in your life. Ever thought why this or that never goes your way?

'I cant do that.'

'Wow, you're so much more better than me, I can never be as good as you.'

So on and so forth. Does these words somehow, ring a bell?

Because you're always telling people and honestly, yourself as well, that you can never do so, then honestly speaking, you'll never do so. You'll never get it. You can never do it. You can never be as good as that. So drop the act, you know you can, you know you'll get it, you know you can be as good as that. Still think you cant? Just put in a little more effort. Don't just come out and say I can do it, of course there needs to be a little bit of effort.

Action speaks louder than words. Just do it. /coughnikeanyonecough

Also, never look for self-pity. Harsh reality says no. Never. No one will ever pity you, unless it's something worth pitying for. What will you gain? Nothing. So never ever find self-pity. Be confident in life. Stiffen' up and face reality. Be strong because life's a war, soldier.

Music. It helps. Update your playlist from time to time. LOL. Listen to emo music if you must, but dont stick to it so much, you'll eventually just think about the stuff you do not want, but it will likely happen, somehow. Just change the tempo while you're at it. Like, from emo to upbeat. Dont just jump from emo to upbeat, find something emo, moderate, and then upbeat, well, something of the sort, you know what I'm sayin'. LOL.

Have fun. A very lesson that I've once failed to learn. No need to be competitive, just strut your stuff, enjoy, because life's a lot more easier that way. Being competitive just brings in more competition, and more competition means more burden, and burden leads you to something really nasty. So what if you lose? At least you'd be able to learn and maybe earn something along the way. 8)

Winning is never always an option.

There's more and I'd love to type some more, but I'm kind of tired. LOL. And this whole post is to remind myself as well. And a little thing I've faced throughout the year. Tough times, great times, a plenty. I'm more of a nerd and an introvert in school. But the peeps in school, they never really got to see the real me. The one that's more of a goofball rather than some timid lonely person. ROFL.

I've been called weird one too many times, but I dont care, that's what makes a person different. 8)

I've been called a loser too, well not really, but I felt like a loser that one time. LOL. Ouch. OTL.

Well, time for me to sleep, and wait for another monthly update. /shot.

Ciao.

Peace. :Dv

You're only going to live life once, so live life the fullest. Live, Life, Love.

I say HAY YAY

2010-06-04T16:11:00.004+08:00

Yes, monthly blog update it is. ROFL.

I'm bored so imma hop on here and update. 8)

Alright, soooooo wassup peepos?

...okay this seems awkward. I come up here to update but i haz nuthinz to updatez. D: /phails.

It's 2 weeks of holidays! Any plans? :D

Well, for me, it'll be a songwriting spree! /shot. Yes, i am that hopeless, mama aint bringing us kiddies anywhere and no one invited me out, 'cept on the upcoming Monday i'm going out with my peepos, LOL, so i might as well write songs. D:

Hay, it aint that bad, i'm working on a few songs now. And i'm working double hard on these songs recently because of some inspirational boost i have recently, and i wanted these songs to sound good. :D

The previous ones arent as satisfying, and if i dare say it, they sucked so hard. LOL. So i'm working on upbeat-y and maybe some jazz-y(?) songs, something not monotonous and boring like the previous ones. D8

I've always wanted to do upbeat-y songs, 'cept they come out all funny and they ended up being all monotonous and boring. ROFL.

I think this time, the songs will be more, well, developed and more fun to write about, it's a pain but well, to actually make this whole thing work, i'll need to go through the obstacles. 8D;;

So please do look forward to it. 8Db

AND HAY. It's 2 weeks, i have plenty of time. ~~'Cept for the fact that SPM's coming near and i need to study. Darn you stupid certificate of doom. D:~~

I already have plans for the future, i've sorted everything out. 8)

The only problem that everyone would face is. MONEY. OTL;;

Let's put that aside for now. 8D;;

I'm going to change my header soon and my blog's name/title/whatever you call it. Need something HAPPEH HAPPEH. 8)

So look forward to that HAPPEH HAPPEH thing, and yes, after MONTHS of not drawing anything, i might actually whip something up just for that header, or maybe recycle something i used to draw then. ROFLROFL. /SHOT.

Well, that's about it. Not going to update for maybe a month, we'll see. 8D;;

Now off i go! Songwriting spree begins! /shot.

Peace. ciao. 8Dv

You guys... just wait. You'll see what's coming up ahead. :) ♥

Down

2010-05-10T14:39:00.004+08:00

Wow, this is becoming a monthly blog update or some shiz. ROFL.

Well i'm kinda down today, or maybe just uber down today, so i thought i'd just blog a little something what has happened recently and stuff.

I lost at the Talent thing in school, had fun though. :)

Alot of people told me i should've win instead of that one bitchy friend of mine, but bleh, i dont really care much, at least i've gained the experience. :D

And well, school's the same, the usual. I'm a Loner. Wetoriya wetoriya- /shot.

I dont feel like entering school anymore. D:

Long story.

I've made another song, not long after the previous. Made it all by myself. It's really random, but i still love the song anywho, it's alot better than the previous. 8)

And well, nothing else happen. Oh! I've got a brand new guitar, not a Fender though sadly, i'll probably get that a little later. 8)

It's a Farida D-52NS. Not a really famous brand, but it sounds epically awesome. The sound that it produces that is. It's actually a normal guitar but the store had it customized with a pick-up, a thing where you can plug in the amplifier and stuff. Kinda awesome. 8Db

Needed the guitar because of the Talent thing in school. Although i lost, and well, i cried, but it wasnt serious, just got teary and stuff, but hey, who doesnt cry. ROFL. It's like a stepping stone of what i'll need to face later on. 8)

I made new friends when i participated in this Talent thing. And they were so much awesome. Fun to be around too, 'cept i dont really mix around with them and such, but hey, we still wave and say hi to each other with our smiling faces on. 8)

Well, not much i can actually blog about. 'Cept for the fact that i actually named my guitars because people kept asking me what's the name of my this-and-that guitar. ROFLROFL. /shot.

Ciao. Peace. 8Dv

Hello World

2010-04-04T23:09:00.009+08:00

WOW. It took me a while to update. ROFL. But yeah, i didnt really have anything to update with to be honest, i got my ups and downs but i was able to 'walk' through them with ease. :Db

Well, hmm, let's see.

I've made my own original song, with the help of my friend. Like FINALLY. LOL. I've made tonnes but never got the chance to finish them, it's either they're too crappy, lyric-less, procrastination or random stuff you can actually think of. Im seriously hopeless in making my own songs, i managed to make the Chorus, the Intro and other stuff though. My friend was the guideline and i made the song. 8D;;

I came up with the song first and i made the Intro, so i just HAD to show it to her how it sounds like and how the lyrics went since she helps out ALOT if it's music-making, she's good in writing stuff so yeah. :D

It's not really good, but i'm happy with it, i found the flaws but im not sure how to change it and stuff, because if i DID change, it might change the rhythm, melody, and meaning to the song, which it's not good, at all, for me that is. LOL. D8>

But seriously, i have to make an original song, purely made by me, i just have to. Even my friend told me i have to make an original song that's only made by me, song, lyrics, everything. orz;;

Oh, my school's having 'Talent Time'.

...I dont have to explain what it is right? ROFL.

Yeah, i'm going up for the auditions, because well, it's the last year of school, i have to at LEAST join something before i graduate. D8>

What talent will i be auditioning? Well, we'll soon find out. C8

Hmm, what else.

I'm Grade 3 now, i changed my Classical course to Acoustics, and seriously, Acoustics is a serious pain in the ass. D8

It's like a book of barre chords. LOL. My wrist hurts like HELL when i strummed the barres. IT'S ALL FRIGGIN' BARRES. D:>

Andddddd i'm saving up money for a new Acoustic guitar, it might affect my next post as i'm going to be spazzing and ranting all about the guitar. ROFL.

Why am i saving up for a new Acoustic guitar? Because i need one where i can go for gigs and stuff, the one where you could usually plug in into an amp, acoustics-electric? LOL. *hint hint, YUI's guitar*

Why am i not aiming for an Electric guitar now? Because i suck at playing the Electric, i'd rather get a suitable guitar of what i'm fond of now rather then something i DONT know how to play. I pity the poor Electric guitar my uncle lent me, it's been sitting there for months now. *bawls* 8'C

I might go for Electric after a Grade of Acoustics and then i'm switching off to Fingerstyling. 8Db *shot*

At least i'd be able to get to know the basics of all the guitar courses. >8I

Well, how's life?

Life's great! Never been better! ...In the world of the webs that is. LOL.

Yeahhh, i'm kind of a loner in school, unless we're talking about the Music Club, that's a different thing. <8'D

Naw, i'm fine really, about being a loner and all, got used to it. 8D;;

What keeps me up and going, 'nuff said, music, period. dot. LOL. Period = dot.

I dont mix around people much lately, which is bad. orz;;

Because well, with the previous 'friends' i had, i was alot more comfortable with them, but i stopped hanging out with them, bad influence is bad. D8

But the current ones i mix around, there's ALWAYS this weird and awkward atmosphere, makes me all sad. 8C

Gah that reminds me, im sitting with this one annoying girl ever since school re-opened during January, she's seriously getting on my nerves. Dl

Yeah, i dont really have friends in school, just the Music Club's meeting that i'm always and so looking forward to every Friday. 8Db

Even better, my form teacher's the club's adivsor. Hey, it's not bad at all. LOL. She's fun to hang around with, really funny and is the type where she thinks she's still in her teens. ROFL. But dont make her mad, she bites back really hard. D8>

She loves the club, but is a two-faced person, not saying it's bad. LOL. She has her image and all so i can understand. Long story to why i said she's two-faced. 8D;;

Well, i dont think there's much i can think of anymore. D8

And holy crap, it's a longgg update, almost related to music. o___o

Ciao and Peace. 8Dv

I'm getting there
....I can feel it.
I am confident.

Thrill Love

2010-03-19T01:18:00.006+08:00

I'm all alone.

But i'll make my dreams come true, no matter what.

I believe i can reach it, so i'll go for it.

I try to be independent, but i've got no one.

So being independent will be the only choice.

I'll do whatever it takes to search for that one dream, that one hope, that one destiny.

For I will make a new path, and that shall be my new destiny.

Even if there's no one to support me, i'll do this on my own.

I'll show to the people.

Who looked down on me.

Salad-tossed me.

Going on a roller-coaster of obstacles, maybe i should.

There's no running away, as this is the path i've chosen.

I'll reach it, no matter what.

I want to reach it, so i will.

I want to have it, so i'll go for it.

Doing all this, would send thrills down my desired wish.

Hmm...

...This will be fun. C:

What?

2010-02-26T17:08:00.005+08:00

I never backed you up? Serious? Lol. Think again. Hmm, maybe so. LOL.

You back me up? ROFL. Such white lies, you betrayed me by siding with her when you boycotted me. Yes you did help me up when im down, but you've never ever did anything seriously, you've never helped me up seriously.

Sisters? Are we still sisters? To you i might not be a sister anymore, but i still treat you as one. Say whatever you want but i still do. Even though we dont talk as much as we used to, i still treat you as one.

Useless? Well i'll admit im useless. Indeed i am.

"I love my other friends but they won’t back me up (useless) But I always back them up. Nvm. I ady forget them. Its much better this way. We’ll just go our separate ways :)"

Well, i ate the chilli and of course it's spicy. Lol.

Arent those the words you always say?

Siapa makan cili dia rasa pedas.

Seperate ways? Hmm, up to you really. I'm not scared of you anymore, nor am i scared of your gang.

Of course, if you play nice i'll just follow along. Just dont mess with me, i bite as hard as my dog would bite.

You're with your indian gang, you're a half chinese and half filipino, not being a racist, but you've got chinese friends, have you ever cared for them? Lol, dont think so. I've never even seen you talked to them or recess with them anymore, about texting each other? Iunno. Lol. And you want us to care for you? Go dig yourself a grave.

You love to scold people and sometimes mumble to yourself with hate about a certain person. Cant say it in front of their face? Lol. Instead of saying what's in your mind, you show off your temper instead. Is it really right? You be the judge.

You just love showing off dont you? You dont even know you're showing off, but actually, you do. You kept singing in class, im getting fed up of it. You know how to sing, so what? You know how to dance, so what? Do you have to go everybody's back and tell them how much they suck at doing a certain thing? To be honest, i've never seen you giving a praise to ANYONE before. Not even me. Rofl. You like to praise yourself but you've never praised others. Are you so obsessed with self-praises? Lol.

Every being in this world is not perfect. So if you think you're so darn perfect, get a grip, you arent.

You never say you were, but you act like one.

You told me you wanted to stop talking to her, talk to her less, avoid her. But what? Have you forgotten all of this? After you've boycotted me? All of your words you've kept, are just words, no actions.

If you really can pull a punch on a person, show me. You know how to fight? I've never seen you fight before, just cat fights. Lol. Your fight are just words, no actions.

You keep grudges, you hate almost everyone in the school, cant you just give up and be friends? Why so hard?

This rant is my point of view of you. If there's anything that offended you, im sorry.

My words may be harsh, but it's what i have in mind of you and i need it to get it out of me.

If you are offended and you'd like to talk with me, come have a chat with me, alone. It wouldnt be fair for a person to gang up on one now am i right?

And if you're wondering i still have a grudge on you, i'll state it right here, i do not.

If you're wondering why the long rant, well, i dont like losing a friend, losing a friend it's like losing a part of your life.

I had forgotten the past.

I still have to wonder,

Should we just go our seperate ways?

Whoa

2010-02-18T18:06:00.003+08:00

WOW, how long has it been since i last update this really dead blog of mine. LOL. Sorry for the really late update. D8>

Nothing much happened i guess, as usual, life's a bore, no progress on anything and such, reason why there arent any updates.

So it's CNY, and yet again, i lost big on gambling. LOL. Like real big. My cousins are such an ass, i just hate them. D:

Well not all of my cousins though, just THESE few peeps, long story short, they're an ass, end of story.

And well, that's my report of the day, reason why i updated this dead blog of mine is because im as bored as heck, brothers arent home. D:

Ciao.

Peace. :Dv

I'll never be able to reach it, never ever will. Do i have the potential? I dont think so.

Fallin' For You

2010-01-14T23:20:00.003+08:00

I think I'm Fallin' For You~

Recorded this during Monday. Didnt plan to record it because i phail, but since my friend wants me to badly record it, i did. LOL. Long story short, i recorded for a friend. C8

And i did mentioned i wanted to try playing and singing this song. 8D

Feedback appreciated! 8Db

And yussss, Little Rai is meeeeeeeee. lul. :D

Expect something else from me later. Im making a certain something up with my friend. C8

Ciao.

Peace. 8Dv

DIE FOOL. D8<

2010-01-07T15:43:00.010+08:00

I was trying to de-stress myself. My pen that didnt last for a week and my mechanical pencil that was with me for years got stolen while i wasnt looking. I brought my guitar to school and played it during recess, and it got stolen during that period, i knew who stole it. Heck i dont even know the guy personally, we're not even friends, he's my friend's friend. D:

Who knew after getting done with the whole thing i felt so much better, and talk about improvement in a whole new level with a mixture of rage. LOL. And i felt alot more better by listening to Colbie Caillat's 'Fallin' For You' song. C8

And i drew this with a spare pencil i just bought recently, i dont really like it, as i dont have feelings for it and i still prefer my previous one. ;________;

I'm going to get the same mechanical pencil and pen again later. :Db

I totally didnt pay attention in class and never take down any notes, because my trusty stationaries weren't by my side. 8'C *bawls*

Ciao.

Peace. ;Dv

P/S: Colbie Caillat's 'Fallin' For You' song is addicting, and im really eager to memorize this song and play it someday soon. C8

OMGWTFBBQ

2010-01-04T16:43:00.002+08:00

ASKLJKLGASKJ SHIET. D:

My moral teacher is the same and exact teacher i had last year. WTF. OTL;;

Will now slit my wrist in a corner. D:

WTH MAN I CANT BELIEVE THIS. D:

Anyway, took my computer for a fix, will be getting back the CPU tonight. Like finally. LOL. /shot.

Not much to rant about, just wanted to drop by and update.

Ciao.

Peace.

Computer

2009-12-31T16:11:00.003+08:00

Stupid computer died on me, phug. D:

And i get all the blame on myself as i was just trying to fix it. D:

Dad ganged up on me with my mom.

'You're not allowed to use the computer anymore, and dont even think of using your brother's.'

'I NEVER BROKE IT I TELL YOU FIRST. I NEVER BROKE IT.'

I actually shouted at my dad on the phone, wow, how daughterly of me. D:

I friggin' swear, i was just trying to fix the computer as the computer is as broken as it is from the beginning. I told my mom that i wanted to take the computer for a fix but noooo she wouldnt even care, as it was not as serious as it is now. WTF. D:

So i wont be using the computer for certain times, i'll see what i can do, for now.

Ciao.

Peace.

Kurisumasu

2009-12-26T13:21:00.004+08:00

Ahh, finally a bittersweet feeling's over. :D

Had my birthday celebration at Pavilion yesterday. 8D

Was suppose to go to Ipoh but my mom's brother was coming to stay, and this was actually a last minute thing, so yeah trip cancelled at the very last minute, bummer. D:

Oh, i bought a Domo-kun plushie in a mall not very far from my place. But sadly after a few hours when i got home, i noticed my Domo-kun's armpit has a slit. D:

But it's not very visible, in fact, it's not visible at all! Unless you pull up his arm then yeah, you'll be able to see that tiny slit. I dont feel like sewing it back because it wont feel the same anymore. D:

I plan on getting another one, though smaller so i can use it for a certain cosplay next year, and if i still have some cash with me, i'm going to buy another one with the same size. :D

I'm a Domo-kun freak. :P

Anyway, school's reopening, so not looking forward to it as some of you may know.

And i'm still in my holiday mood, i dont feel like going back to school. D:

I kinda emo-ed a little yesterday during my bday, personal reasons.

So yeah, rant ends here, will post more when i have ze time. C:

And to all the people who wished me a happy birthday, i want to thank you for the wishes, appreciate it. 8Db

Peace. :Dv

Habit

2009-12-23T11:38:00.004+08:00

Sleeping habit. D:

Yeah, i havent been blogging much. Sorry, there's really nothing much to blog about. XD;;

So yeah, i havent been sleeping early, everytime i lay at bed i cant seem to sleep. D:

I have to readjust my sleeping habit or not i'll be having trouble going to school, paying attention in class. OTL;;

So anyway, what have i been up to?

Yeah, nothing much, just laying around, playing the computer, surfing the net, blakldfgjdafgj. Nothing much really. D:

And yus, holidays are BORING, but i wish for holidays more than school, i dont want to see those peeps in school, they scare the heck outta me. D:

They always push me around, thinking they're nice or whatever goody-two-shoes you can think of, but in reality, they're as beetchy as beetches can do. D:

I just can stand them, they always take it their way.

Weird thing is, everytime i stand up for myself, i always seem to get backfired by them. I just wish i could have better friends. D:

My friends over here, is more like how i used to live back then in USJ13, it's a scary place.

To be honest, people here are even more scarier than the people i used to be with. Reason why i love my holidays more than my schooling days.

I feel like a bird trapped in a cage, it's like everytime i enter the schooling area, that is when i wish for the whole thing to end, waiting for the last bell to ring so i could quickly be back home. Home's the best place to hang around rather than being in a school with bitches that dont respect what you do and more of like what they prefer you doing their way.

So okai, nothing much to report.

Oh, I'm selling off my anime merchandises, most of them though, anyone interested please msn/text/call/leave a message at the cbox and i'll show you the list of things i'll be selling off. C:

Peace. :Dv

P/S: I wish school never existed.

All in one.

2009-12-16T20:07:00.001+08:00

All in one go! >8D

Meh just bored, i wont be posting much as usual.

CF's near, like super near. 3 more days. D:

Peace. :D

P/S: All 9.

Boo

2009-12-13T00:07:00.001+08:00

Bored, has nothing to do. BLEK. 8B

Peace. :Dv

P/S: TaeYeon and Jessica. 8Bb

Is it necessary?

2009-12-10T16:00:00.003+08:00

To make a blog?

Everytime i come crawling back here and ended up being emo typing out emo stuff, my spirit and my motivation isnt fully recovered, well it's more like dead. D:

This place is like a place for me to emo all the time, it scares and kills me. D:

I'm just so afraid of facing the future now, i'm not sure what to do. ._________.

Should i just slit my wrist and end this? ;___;

Nah that was a bad idea, it's like running away from what you would need to face ahead of you.

The thought of going back to this dreaded school, is killing my mood. D:

I just wish i could quit school. ._____.

...I just wish i could scream my lungs out at a place where no one's around.

Now for certain, there is a thing i always wanted it to happen, but i guess it will NEVER ever happen, not where i'm living.

Oh well, emo rant over.

Will update soon i guess. :D

Peace. l'Dv

P/S: Is it necassary for me to live what im striving for now?

Thank you

2009-12-08T15:13:00.001+08:00

Your new song brought me back my spirit and my motivation, i thank you.

Fool

2009-12-08T00:21:00.005+08:00

Yeap, tired. Nothing to rant much.

But well, there was this one person who pissed me off. D:

Hey, you. The person who said dreams are just dreams.

Just leave me be okay? It's my blog, i rant what i want.

And blogs are meant to be for people who to write whatever they want.

You just wasted 10 seconds of your life telling me i should stop being the idiot and im the fool that should get a life, who's the fool now?

YOU go get a life, not ME.

These so-called DREAMS, are what's motivating me into doing what i want right now, so if you were to come barging in telling me that dreams are meant to be dreams and might never come true, then let me tell you something, if my dreams were to come true one day, i'll shove your words right back up your mouth, so watch it.

That's why they are called DREAMS.

I know it may never come true, but who knows if it did. So leave me be on what i want to rant. :/

FOOL.

Okay rant's over. I'll update again later.

I'm too emo and furious over this guy, he/she just comes barging in my blog and telling me something like this. He/She just killed my spirit and my motivation. :/

Jerkface.

Peace.

P/S: If i actually knew that you are one of my friends or if i do see you in real life, i swear i will punch you right at the face. D:

Oh em Gee Gee Gee Gee

2009-12-07T07:37:00.004+08:00

ImYoA, for the 8th TIME.

She was wearing the clothes from the Innisfree thing.

Showed off her bright and cheerful smile.

Mouth open as wide as her usual alligator smiles.

She was radiating off light.

Beautiful...

Oh c'mon, it's the 8th time, there must be something good that'll happen to me in the future. ;_________;

Dont play with my mind if something good's not going to happen. ;A;

Anyways, just wanted to type who and what i dreamt, and i just woke up too you see, will update another post tonight or maybe tomorrow, depends. 8U

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: ...So cute and pretty. ; 3;

I was bored

2009-12-06T12:51:00.004+08:00

If you guys noticed, i added another gadget on the side.

Idol Dreams. LOL.

I WAS BORED. AND WANTED TO BE RANDOM. LOL.

Well, since i didnt want to forget how many times i dream of a certain celebrity/idol, i want to jot it down here. 8D

And i never lie how many times i dream about my idols, because what's the use if i DID lie? I'd just end up having bad dreams. D8

And well, yes i dreamt of another person today, 2 idols actually. LOL.

Oh, and the other day i dreamt about myself busking solo during CF09. Weird. D8

But yeah, i'll be busking with a friend of mine then and i cant wait. :D

I'll probably go for a Stage Performance then, but it really depends. Since im still a coward. .___________.

Anyway, that's about it.

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Yuri and Sunny.

Back from the mountains

2009-12-03T13:48:00.002+08:00

2 days ago, lololol. *shot*

Nothing much, just slept at the mountain resort and then went to another hotel to watch the sea. But overall a fun trip. :Db

As usual, i've got nothing to talk or rant about, lolololol.

But funny thing was, i woke up having a bloody nose. LOL.

I'm pretty sure the dream i dreamt was decent, no PG rated or anything. LOL.

Well, yeah it's another idol dream, ImYoA again, FOR THE 7TH TIME. LOL.

I'm telling you, god is trying to tell me something. D:

And it pwned my YUI dreams, LOL. I dreamt of YUI for only 3 times, and ImYoA beat her to a 7. LOL.

Okay enough ranting, back to business.

...On second thought, i've got nothing to blog about.

Peace. :Dv

P/S: *shot*

Oh yo thar

2009-11-27T01:01:00.002+08:00

Sorry, im out of spelling error hies. D:

Came back from my grandfather's bday dinner, and i must say it was satisfying. :D

'Cept for the fact my uncle was around. >__>

I'll be having another dinner- tomorrow or today i dont care, LOL. During FRIDAY, i'll be having another celebration of my grandfather's bday dinner.

Im going to be random again, i tried out SuJu's Sorry Sorry dance, randomly with my cousins. LOL.

And i must say, it isnt easy. D:

As seen on their MV's, it isnt easy. Except for the leg-slapping, hand-rubbing dances, i just cant do the leg shuffle. D:

Well, im going to try out random dances, since im not allowed to go for classes, i'll randomly do dances. Geez why didnt i thought of it earlier. *shot*

And well, as much as i hate saying this, i might be using Music, to step in my life and make it my career. I haven't told anyone about this, especially my family, so yeah. What will i deal with music? I'm not sure, might as well have nature play it's course. :D

I KNOW my parents wouldnt allow me to do so, but this is what i want. If music fails me in my life.... i'm not sure what else i should do anymore, so yeah. :D

Okay im not going to go emo and think about this, for now, i'll strive with doing what's best. Improve on every single thing that needs to be improved on, even studies, yes how i hate that activity, but im forced to anyway. D:

I may not have a great sound when i sing, and as you know, friends would always say you're good at singing, but in reality, when you think you're not good, you're not good! But if you think you're great, then that's probably where everything starts getting better, you're improving, you're confidence has been shot up to a level where you're not afraid to be pulled down, boast about it, but dont boast as much, put effort in it as well. I'm sorry im just talking gibberish. My bad. But well, that's what i'd like to tell to myself.

I have friends from every corners of the world, and they all come telling me i sound good, but in reality, i dont think i do, and i need someone to be honest with me if i sound good or bad, that's why i always tried singing in front to my friends online, i'm not sure, but sometimes the answers i get, arent always the one i wanted. I just want someone to criticize on my singing. And as i may know, my voice sounds like a little 13 year old boy reaching to his puberty age.

I really need to start recording myself singing and post it on YouTube, so i'd get better feedback, because i still feel i lack something. And despite all these rant, i might be going for vocal training. Because im getting frustrated with my voice and my singing, i feel there's something i lack that's why, when i sing, my mind will straight be set into 'i-sing-really-bad/awful' mode.

Okay im done with my rant, i'll be ranting again tomorrow/today/friday night. Or maybe not. Lololol.

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Im going to try dancing out some random moves my picking out random songs from random MV's. Just for the fun of it. :D

Oh hay thar

2009-11-25T13:20:00.003+08:00

Yeahhhh, just wanted to randomly rant and blog whatever comes to mind.

Soo there'll be a 6K/2005 reunion, as 6K might know, but i'm not going, or rather, i CANT go. Lol.

I'll be having another dinner on that night as well, so yeah, whoever's going, you guys have fun. :D

Boooo, my idol dreams are not coming back to me recently. :C

It's okay, im sure i'll dream my idol dreams again. :Db

On another side note, i have a slight feeling that i wont be spending much during CF this year, or i could be wrong again, 2 reasons why.

1. Pandabaka will be there, im pretty sure i'll go on a shopping spree because of her, lololol.

2. I was watching some of the people in devART and they kinda told us what they were going to sell, so i kinda got interested, and yeah, you know what happens next. XD;;

And i have to admit, i wasnt playing the e-guitar for weeks now, finally got my hands on some new tabs and was trying out last night, i kinda got stuck on some parts but well, if i just practice, it'll be better. :D

And im not sure if i've mention this from my few previous posts, too lazy to check anyway, i'll be going to Kota Kinabalu this Saturday to meet my uncle and aunties. Why aunties? Because there's another grandauntie. Lolololol.

And my baby cousins as well. Will take pics at the beach. :D

Speaking of pictures, my fringe got chopped off yesterday, and i was planning to leave it long too, before school forbids me to, FML. D:

Well, it's okay though, i was planning to chop it off anyways, for the sake of cosplay. D:

On a brighter note, i can go out happily as a guy now, lolol. If i just did some adjustments with 'ah-hem' and such, i'm a complete guy. LOL.

asldkhajdak, seriously, i have to stop thinking about my fringe, it's killing me. D:

I told my mom to tell the person who cuts my hair NOT to cut my fringe, but i guess she forgot, so the saloon-ist(sue me, i dont know what you call it, LOL.), without a doubt, CHOPPED off my fringe, so it's like, gone. LOL.

And i wanted to do a side-parting fringe, as i was getting bored with my middle-parting, and i think she chopped my fringe back to a middle parting. D:

SHE FREAKING BUTCHERED MY HAIR. D:

My hair is freakishly short now, well im okay with it, BUT MY FRINGE. ;_______;

*sigh* I guess i'll have to wait until my SPM's over. D:

Or i can always break the school rules and start living my fringe really long. i can chop off my back hair, so i dont mind, just the fringe, MY FREAKING FRINGE. ;________;

I'm still mad at the fact my fringe is gone, aawaenflsdfmsjfhki.

It'll take WEEKSSS to get the same length back. D:

Okay before i get really mad, i shall end my rant here.

Peace. :Dv

P/S: I actually dreamt of myself with a very ugly haircut, and i would not like to, in years ever, have that haircut i dreamt of. D:

I love my idol dreams.

2009-11-21T00:20:00.004+08:00

Random but yes, i love them. :D

Nothing much to blog about, it's been a while since i blog, so yeah.

...Okay i've got seriously nothing to blog about.

'Cept i'm going to Kota Kinabalu at the Eastern side of M'sia, next Saturdayy.

And i dont think i can go out with friends because im kind of broke. D8

Im currently saving up for Comic Fiesta. D8

Sorry guys. ;A;

'Kay then, that's about it, ciao. :D

Peace. :Dv

P/S: I dreamt of all 9 yesterday. It was epic, awesome, great, niceeeeee. I even dreamt of Amber. 8Db

EDIT: (1.57 p.m)

P/S/S: I dreamt of ImYoA again. LOLOLOLOL. THE FRIGGIN 6TH TIME MAN. GOD, ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING?

Hahahaha hahaha~

2009-11-11T18:15:00.004+08:00

Himduldamyon hahaha~ Moduhamkke hahaha~

Sorry, i'm out of title ideas. D:

After such a long time, i finally drew SOMETHING decent. OTL;;

Yeahh, like i said, i got addicted with Domo-kun. D:

I've got another version, without his mask on that is. If you want to have a look at it, you can always go to my devART to check it out. :D

Weird, my throat's still sore. D:

I mean i speak fine, but to me it's sore. D:

I'm still singing my heart out, i'm trying my best to actually improve myself, with LOTS of ways. Yes, i recorded myself, despite saying i wouldnt. But i recorded myself, so i can tell myself that this is how i actually sound like to other people but to myself it sounds plenty different.

To myself, i sounded like i have a very deep voice, but after i recorded it, i noticed how much of a baby my voice sounds like. LOL.

So after getting used to my baby voice, i'll need to start improving here and there, because i've noticed the few flaws when i sing, lol.

I really need to go for vocal lessons, but i'm not even sure if my mom allows it, seeing that i'm already having guitar lessons. And yes, the centre where i have my guitar lessons, has vocal lessons as well, there's more but i'll state that later, lol, it's like, they got every types of courses you need in music.

I might as well ask my mom about vocal lessons later on. She's currently in Bangkok and will only come back during this Saturday. :C

Well, i did ask a friend of mine to help me out, all she could do is laugh, lol( the girl from the previous post i think, about herself singing on stage and such. ).

So i asked another good friend of mine, she's willing to help of course, i just need to sing to her and she'll tell me what needs to be fixed. :D. I'm so glad i have friends that actually goes for actual vocal courses and is willing to help. :D

If you're wondering if i'm actually interested in dancing, yes, i'd like to try something new of course. I'm a Spontaneous Idealist you see. :D *SHOT*. I did post about this sometime ago, the dancing part of course. Even if my mom doesnt allow it, i still tried dancing, in my mind of course. Because i'm not the type of person who usually likes dancing, so it might take some time for me to actually try to get up and dance. Not saying the fact i DONT dance, i do dance the Chicken Dance you see. LOL. *SHOT*. I dance for the laughter, so that explains why i danced it. :C

Okay on to another random topic, i skipped school for 2 straight days. Because well, there's nothing to do in school since exams are over. Might skip again tomorrow. Because sleeping is so much better. C:

Oh, i dreamt about the world coming to an end, in a very funny way of course, something to do with prefects and such. LOL. Such a phailed dream. D:

Idol dreams are so much better. :C *shot*

ANYWAY, that's all i have to rant about today. Might post another post again tomorrow, depends on the mood. So yeahs. C:

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Congrats on your very first solo concert! I'm happy for you! SS Hwaiting! 8Db. Wished you guys could come here though. 8C

P/S/S: I will strive for the better.

Oh wee

2009-11-09T15:21:00.004+08:00

Meh, i want go have a nap, but felt like blogging, so i shall blog before i head for hibernation. lD

So yeah, as bored as i am now, i am now Grade 2, but it doesnt really help much, because i knew most of the chords already *shot*, but yeah the only thing about it is that i needed to learn how to read the notes. OTL;;

Might not be going school for the whole week, except Friday maybe, since i want to have the last drumming sessions with my seniors. :D

Last Saturday, went out with Vivi, Cel, Xin, Ryan, JY and his lil bro, lolz.

Nothing much, when i arrived, me, Cel and Vivi decided to eat something small. So we went for okonomiyaki, is the spelling right? Lol. So after that, the rest of the guys came, except Xin, as she was having her Jap exam.

During lunch time, all of us decided to go for Mcdonald at first, but after looking around the area, where there weren't any spaces, we decided to go for Pizza Hut instead, and boy, did i ate alot of food, i was supposed to limit myself, but i couldnt, because the guys wouldnt want to finish some of the portions, and so us girls, and of course Ryan, had to stuff our stomachs as much as we can finish it, we manage to finish everything excluding the breadsticks though. There was, a 4 person pizza, 5 mushroom soups and a cheese baked rice, supposingly i didnt want to order the rice because it's there's quite alot of food, but since Cel said she wanted to try it, i was sure no prob, but after stuffing herself with just one bread, she told me she didnt want it anymore and told me i had to eat it. LOL. So yeah, i ate the whole thing, leaving one of my sliced pizza to Cel. I'm not sure who she gave the last piece, but i think it's Ryan.

After the meal, we decided to go for a karaoke session, and well, i was really looking forward to it, because it'll be my second time entering. Lol. The price was heck of a theif's price. D:. Ryan, JY and his lil brother didnt want to enter the place because they were out of cash, to be more precise, JY and his lil brother did not bring any money while Ryan used his share on the pizza. So they were money-less.

Sang our hearts out for 3 hours, and yeah, im going to admit again, i SUCK at singing, seriously, my voice cracked when i tried singing louder, it tends to crack everytime i tried to sing louder. LOL. I cant seem to forget about the fact that i suck at singing, alot more worst than the cries of a baby, heck i want someone elses voice instead of mine. OTL;;. Anddddd so my throat's a bit sore since that day. XD;;

After that, when we came out from the place, Ryan, JY and his little brother all went home, while us girls are still at the mall, chillin'. Vivi went back a little early, so me, Cel and Xin decided to go to Popular to check out books while Xin waits for her brother to pick Cel and herself up later on.

But before that, i needed to get a present for my friend so we went to a certain shop to get one, and i saw a friggin' Domo-kun doll. o___o

I recently got addicted to this little critter. D8

IT'S SO CUTE. ;__;

I'd really want one for my birthday, so i can bring it out with me the next time i go out for an outing, it's so cute. ;______;

I wanted to buy one for myself during that time, but looking at my poor budget condition, i hesistated and decided to buy it later on. ._____.

THE THING'S PRACTICALLY CALLING MY NAME AND ASKING ME TO BUY IT. ;A;

...I'm seriously broke, i need a job. D:

I dont think i'll be having enough cash for CF, and pandabaka's coming too, phugggg.

SHE'S COMING AND I DONT HAVE ENOUGH CASH TO BUY HER STUFFIES. ;A; OTL;;

...oh jeebus, i need my nap, i'll update this post again later on. XD;;

Peace. 8D

P/S: I drew a Domo-kun Gijinka, finally im drawing, LOL. Will post it up later on, have yet to finalize it's design, not too complicated, really simple design. :Db

Oh yayzors

2009-11-06T22:08:00.002+08:00

Im becoming Grade 2 this Sunday, supposingly should've became Grade 2 on the 30th of October but since there were tonnes of replacements due to mom being not free, i'm becoming Grade 2 this Sunday, my replacement day. Lolz.

Oh hey, i've got new obsessions. 8D

Recently i'm really not into anime, weird. LOL. *is bashed*

And i got myself buying something's not anime, WHUT, SO RARE OF ME TO DO SO, LOL. *shot*

I think i need to be bashed again because i've not been drawing recently? OTL;;

And yes if you're wondering why am i acting like this, KPOP is my new obsession. My god. LOL. I cant even get their songs right, i cant even SING it right. LOL.

I'm OBSESSED as hell with KPOP.

Well sooner or later, and i think it's really later, that i'll forget about KPOP, probably in 5 years or so. LOL.

What can i say, i'm a Spontaneous Idealist, i like trying out new things, not saying i forgot about JPOP or anime or drawing, i still LOVE them, it's just that KPOP is occupying me almost EVERYDAY, LOL. OTL;;

...This might be random but i just want everything to turn out alright in the future, i'm always afraid of moving forward, because you'll never know what might bring you down or what might lead you to success, like my current situation. LOL.

...I'm just too afraid of moving forward anymore. .____.

I got dissed by my friend today, because i brought my guitar in school today, and i sang with my friends, and well, my friend said she couldn't sing because i was singing, probably i was interrupting? I'm not sure. And err, whut else, she said she wanted to go upstage next year and sing while me and another friend of mine play the guitar, without the both of us singing of course, i was like, wth. LOL.

It's like she insulted me, indirectly. LOL.

I mean sure, i would really look forward to my friends performing on the stage instead of myself, because well, they need their time to shine. 8D

For myself, i can probably wait, since i know i suck at singing like a whole lot. XD;;

Though my selfish side would think, 'When will it be for me to shine upon everyone?'.

As for my own personal side, yes, i would really want to sing on the stage, but, with me not being satisfied with my own voice, i dont think i could, and yes, some of you may say, have confidence, and i really thank you for supporting me( sounds so cheesy, LOL ). 8D

With your supports, who knows, maybe the next time you'll see me, i'd be a more 'visible' person, instead of invisible, i want to be somebody, not a nobody, like the title of my blog. 8D

So cheesy. LOL. *shot*

...I really need to change the blogheader's picture and title soon. LOL.

Hmm, i think that's probably about it, couldn't think of anymore cheesy stuff. *SHOT*

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I still love YUI and Anime except my obsession for KPOP has grown alot bigger. C:

Oh awesome

2009-11-04T14:06:00.003+08:00

I remember i said i kinda gave up on eveything? Well, it's impossible. XD;;

My singing's improving day by day i guess. But im still not satisfied with the recording outcome, although i havent been recording for a while now. LOL. Because the first thing when i listen to myself singing, it sounds very very very awkward and with sparks of total phailure. Lolz.

So yeah, not going to record myself until i get even better and probably until im satisfied.

And yeah i had an awesome dream last night. I'm not telling because it's a total secret, no, it's not about YUI, it's someone else, ImYoA. The first thing i got out of my bed, i was smiling. LOL. I remembered every single thing in my dream because i remembered i told myself that it must be a dream while i was dreaming. LOL. OTL;;

I'm dreaming about idols one too many times recently, and i love it, i just wish i could keep dreaming on about them because that's the only way to get me motivated to do something. <333~

Hmm, got my results back, not surprising i guess. LOL.

Okay, that's almost about it today.

Peace. <:3v

P/S: Dreamt of ImYoA, and the rest of the members, but saw ImYoA in my dream the most, and i friggin' LOVE it. And this is the 4th time. OMGGGG <33333333333333~

Short random post

2009-11-01T23:17:00.004+08:00

Yes, real short.

I dreamt of YUI today. So i dreamt of YUI consecutively 3 times. Awesome. LOL

And yes, that's my personality above, 95% of it is spot on. LOL. Go try it out, it really works. 8Db

Oh darn it.

2009-10-31T16:00:00.003+08:00

Oh goddamnit, internet's so boring nowadays. D:

Life is so boring too when you cant do or get whatever you want. D:

I woke up like 2 hours ago, and now i feel like going for a nap just after that, lol. That explains my couch potato-ness. XD;;

And for the last time, i recorded myself singing again, and i swear it's a total phailure, a wee bit better than last time, but im still not satisfied. DX

The outcome of it just says 'YOU PHAIL', lol. OTL;;

So many things are pulling me down nowadays, and i think i have given up on art? I dunno seriously. D8

Because, i've lost the urge to do anything anymore, it's like my 'being hyper and active' mode has been switched off, which is sad. D8

Must be the time after i found out how much i sucked at singing. DX

All i can wait now is what's ahead of me, i'll just let everything go by naturally, but it's sad doing so. DX

Okay, im ranting crap and i guess i should stop now before i bore anyone else.

Ciao.

Peace. :Dv

P/S: What's ahead of me in the future? What's waiting for me?

Discouragement.

2009-10-27T14:55:00.002+08:00

My parents have to say those cruel and discouraging words every single time i want to do something.

Why cant they just give me a life and choose my own path?

When i said i wanted to be a manga artist, i got discouraged.

When i said i wanted to be an 2D animator, i got discouraged.

And now when i said i wanted to be ..., i got discouraged, AGAIN.

How many fucking(sorry) times do i need to get discouraged?

I dont know who and what i want to be anymore in the future, it's so sickening, i just want to slit my wrist.

...YEAHHH, LIKE BEING A BEAUTICIAN IS THE ONLY THING THEY'LL ENCOURAGE. FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE, HELL NO.

And when i thought parents are suppose to support you, no matter what you want to do or be.

A person like me, who doesnt like dancing, and is now interested, asked my mom that i want to for lessons and she said no. WHAT THE FUCK(sorry) is that suppose to mean?

She said it's too ROUGH for a girl to be dancing( ex. hip hop ) and i wont act like a GIRLY GIRL anymore, WHO CARES?

I expected some interesting results because, a person like me, i was NEVER interested in dancing, EVER, 'till recently, and she just have to say, NO.

And she even DARED said guitar was already rough for me. I kinda asked my mom loudly and said, 'What? Playing the guitar is rough and not meant for girls? You guys are such closed-minded people.'. I know it is wrong for me to act this way but i seriously got frustrated when she said guitar is a BOY thing.

I'm getting so fed up of the idea of playing the guitar anymore, i just wish i can smash all of 'em, i have no future ahead of me now.

And all she could reply after that was,

'You dont have to do anything else, just concentrate on your studies, dont ask for anything more.'

...What?

And so those stuff my relatives said to her, did she forgot?

The ones like, 'She must be interested in this thing, let her keep going.'

When she asked me to sing for my relatives, i sang for them.

AND NOW WHAT DOES SHE SAY? Guitar is already something rough to play with and it's not meant for GIRLS.

URGH, WHY CANT SHE JUST FRIGGIN' BORN ME BEING A GUY, THEN I WOULD'VE STOPPED HEARING THOSE DARN COMPLAINTS ABOUT GIRLS NOT ALLOWED TO DO THIS AND THAT.

I am NEVER going to do anything for them that is related to the GUITAR, ANYMORE.

They always, and will ALWAYS disagree with what i want to do.

They want me to be GIRLY, LIKE A FRIGGIN' GIRLY GIRL WEARING FRIGGIN' GIRLY AND FRILLY SKIRTS.

...BLEGH.

I mean what's the difference? I'm still human, just that the differeces of me is that, i've got boobs and guys dont. SO? IS THAT SUCH A BOTHER? IS THAT SUCH A BOTHER FOR ME DOING SOMETHING I WANT TO DO AND YOU THINK IT'S ROUGH, IS THAT IT?

IF IT'S SUCH A BOTHER, WHY NOT JUST CHOP OFF THOSE HUMPS YEAH?

...I just dont like being the girl you want me to, and i dont think i'll ever be the girl who wears skirts or dresses, because i seriously, freakishly HATE THEM. I'm a person who prefers wearing stuff that are more related to GUYS not GIRLS.

WHY CANT YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

I'M 16, AND YET YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH I WANT TO DO STUFF THAT IS INTERESTING FOR ME. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO COMPARE STUFF? IS IT ALL LABELLED?

THAT I HAVE TO DO THIS SECTION THAT'S MEANT FOR GIRLS AND THE OTHER SECTION IS NOT FOR ME BECAUSE IT'S A 'GUY' SECTION? IT'S NOT A FRIGGIN' CLOTHING STORE.

...You will never ever understand me. NEVER. EVER.

.........

I've got no future anymore, my future is ruined. I am always discouraged in everything that i want to do. My parents has no faith in me, at all, even in studies.

I swear,

I give up.

I'm going to go get a nap, i just wish i could die during the time i nap.

Peace.

P/S: I SUCK at EVERYTHING.

P/S: My parents can be such closed-minded people.

P/S: Why are my friends allowed to do stuff that i cant? Because their parents are cool and open-minded people, that's why, i salute you guys, and i envy you too.

Lolololol

2009-10-25T14:12:00.002+08:00

Well nothing to report actually, just that last night's concert was kind of surprising. LOL.

Never expected Akon to actually do that. XD;;

And off i go to do my moral project.

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Dreamt of Yoona, Yuri and SooYoung. >8'Db

Oh mai

2009-10-24T00:49:00.004+08:00

Yes, i think i might have a really serious serious art block. o____o

Or maybe im just too lazy and emo over the fact i suck as much as hell does. LOL.

Why am i blogging now? Well, because im bored. DX

And in a few more hours later i'll be heading to Akon's concert. Though i dont really like him, but since my siblings are going, might as well join them. LOL. My parents arent at home so my cousin's driving us to the venue.

....OH YEAH. LOL.

Economy exams are done, im seriously sure im gonna be phailing this, because i kinda gave up during the objective question papers. So a hell of 60 economy essays are waiting for me to get it done. LOL.

And i need to get my moral project done soon, or else im seriously toast. LOL. 3 more, just 3 more. LOL.

I think i really need to sleep soon. I've been having sleeping problems recently. D8

I've been sleeping around 2a.m.++, and i have to get up at 5-6a.m., shiznets. LOL. Is this the meaning of sleep deprived? D8

...Actually, what's the meaning of sleep deprived? LOL. I seriously dont know. D8

Okay, time for me to head to bed. :D

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I LOVE KPOP GIRL GROUPS. ;A;b

In the morning EDIT:
P/S: Dreamt of Yoona again. :Db

Overload.

2009-10-21T22:19:00.003+08:00

GAH. LOL. CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE.

I've been listening to an amounts of KPOP songs and now i kinda ditched YUI and anime. o____________o

And now i'm a huge fan of KPOP Girl Groups. o____________o

IM SORRY YUI! >A< ;A;

Regarding the previous post, yes im still emo about being unable to sing and still sing like a total phailure. LOL. But after hearing a few KPOP songs, it kinda relieved me and makes me want to strive to do better. LOL AND YUI USED TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER. 8C. AND SHE STILL DOES ~~*doesnt want to deny the fact that i've been really into KPOP recently and forgets about YUI*~~. >8C

To be honest i suck at almost everything. LOL. And when i mean everything. EVERYTHING. LOL.

Take basketball for example, i used to play basketball all the time when i was younger, and slowly as i grow up, i became a total couch potato. LOL.

Take piano for another example, in not more than 3 months, i quitted, because i didnt like practicing then, and so i ditched piano for KUMON instead. LOL. I'M A TOTAL PHAILURE, IF ONLY I KNEW PIANO WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN MATHEMATICAL FORMULAS. ;A;

As i grow up, i kinda regretted why i quitted piano. THE AMOUNTS OF AWESOME SONGS I CAN PLAY. ;A;

And now i have a sudden urge of wanting to learn hip-hop. WTH. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. ;A;

I think i've changed? D8. I DUNNO, LOL. OTL;;

I'm beginning to think i'm a very very musical person. o_______o

I have the urge to play almost every music instrument. D8. Like Wang Lee Hom who's awesome in playing almost anything. LOL. I wonder how did he became so pro in playing most the musical instruments in such a short period of time. D8

Well, History and Maths is over. I think im gonna be failing this 2 subjects after taking it today. LOL.

That's about it. Actually there's more to rant but i just cant seem to remember what to rant about. D8

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Emoemoemoemeomeoemoemoemoemeomeoemo. orz;;

Emoooo

2009-10-20T16:44:00.002+08:00

Like a Melody and Harmony in love~

I'm just so emo today after i found out how much i suck at singing.

Why and how? I recorded myself of course, but to think i sound like... a total phailure. .___. orz;;

I just dont know how much i suck, i just wish i could hide in a mouse hole or just slit my wrist. .____.

To think i wanted to be a singer, LOL. Just LOL. No way, no chance. .___________.

Peace.

P/S: Imma go hide in my mouse hole and slit my wrist.

I'm going crazy.

2009-10-19T15:37:00.003+08:00

Yes, now im desperate in wanting to play the piano after hearing a very very nostalgic, traumatizing and beautiful song. o_______o

I kept on replaying the song. LOL. It's a very beautiful piece of song. 8D

I want to play this song someday. LOL. It gives out alot of emotions, emo ones especially. XD;;

I cant wait for my cousins to shift here! They're coming somewhere at the end of the year which is awesome. Why? Because i get to learn how to play the piano from them. 8Db

Exam's tomorrow, and im not studying, yay! *shot*

Gah, it's those days again.

Where i would think what i really want to do in the future. LOL.

I once decided on a certain thing, but that was gone after that. *sigh*

Anyways, that's my report today, my parents arent at home and im home alone. >lDb

So i slept at 5a.m. the other day. LOL. Typical of me no? XD;;

Peace. >lDv

P/S: Dreamt of Yoona. >lDb

ARGH

2009-10-14T23:48:00.002+08:00

Yeah, just phuck.

It's SO frustrating to look for the softwares again. Just phuck. D:

And to top it off, i got scolding from my parents. Wth.

BM down, English Paper 2 tomorrow.

I seriously dont know what i want in life, SOOO frustrating. D:

I just wish i could just slit my wrist. D:

Peace, good luck to all who's having exams tomorrow!

P/S: PHUCK.

Oh just great.

2009-10-14T00:09:00.003+08:00

Yeah, everything's gone in my computer. Not completely but for me it's completely. OTL;;

I cant see any Japanese Kanji or Chinese in the interwebs, just sucks. D:

I know i dont understand a single thing but it really bothers me if i cant see the Kanjis. D:

Now i have to freaking re-download every phucking thing, just great. D:

I'm so frustrated right now i feel like tearing my hair out. D:

EVERYTHING is friggin' gone, i'll need to research the whole website for the stuffies again. D:

OH JUST PHUCK IT.

Will update more stuff later in the afternoon.

Peace.

P/S: Dreamt of Jessica yesterday. lDb

AMBERAMBERAMBER DIES

2009-10-12T00:02:00.011+08:00

PHUCKKKK AMBER'S ON.

ASDFSJDHFKDAMBER'S FREAKING ON, OMGWTFBBQ.

I'M GOING CRAZY.

AND THIS TOO.

....LOOKING FOR KRYSTAL'S PICTURES, JUST EPICCCCCC. <33333

AND THIS.

WHEN I SAW THIS, MY MOTIVATION TO STUDY RISED. LOL. OTL;;

AND ANOTHER ONE BEFORE AMBER LEFT.

AND THISSSSSS.

I'M JUST ABOVER AMBER, HAH! >8Db *SHOT*

My day could've gotten any better. 8DDDDDD

I'm not too happy either because Amber didnt say hi to me. ;A; *SHOT*

I hope Amber kidnaps the other members into the sbox too. ROFL.

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Krystal + Amber <3. MY OTPPPPPPP YEAH. >8Db

Legs are dead

2009-10-11T18:37:00.005+08:00

Yes, my legs are dead due to massive walking marathon. D:

DEAD TIRED, i'd say. orz;;

I'm NEVER going back to Lick Hung's Family Day, EVER, again. orz;;

It is sooooooooooo boring. D:

The walk around the school never even lasted for 10 minutes, and then after that it's like boring as hell. D:

And i had to walk in Pyramid too, goddamnit i'm so tired. Dl

Went to ask the same salesperson about the FG402 guitar today. Seems like it has been discontinued. LOL. OTL;;

Well, at least i had something similar, and i iz already happee. :D

Oh, and i wont be getting my CPU till tomorrow, high chances of it being reformatted. WTH.

And i just wanted to replace the sound card and add another hard disk space to my computer. D:

So if it gets reformatted, i might go crazy, for finding all the stuff that i'd need to download again. .____.

Okay, i'm very tired, my guitar needs me, and i need my guitar. D:

If i dont play them for a day, my mind'll go crazy, LOL.

Okay, report over and out.

Peace. >lDv

P/S: omgwtfbbq, 'holidays' ends at Tuesday and i have to go back to school on Wednesday, oh just phuck. D:

P/S/S: GAH, i just cant stop thinking about THEMM. ._____.

YUIYUIYUIYUIYUI- FOAMS

2009-10-10T19:52:00.007+08:00

YES I DREAMT OF YUI, AGAIN. 8DDDDDDDDDD-*shot*

What can i say, i'm just too obsessed with her. LOL.

This time, we chatted more, but, i'm not sure if we spoke together in English or Jap. LOL. OTL;;

Place? My roooooom. >lDv *SHOT*

BUT IT'S SO SAD THAT IT WAS ONLY A DREAMMMMM, WHYYYYYY. ;A; OTL;;

Oh well, if i dream about her the 3rd time again, then god must be telling me we might actually get together and meet. 8B *SHOT*

Oh yeah, got new shoes today. 8D

Brought my CPU to a 'clinic', so for the mean time, i'm using my bro's. OTL;;

Well, the sound card's dead ~~due to me plugging in the cable from the amp and into the CPU while strumming my elec, causing it to go BOOM~~, soooo i thought i might be able to get back my CPU today, turns out i cant, because, something's wrong( long story ) with my CPU and it needs to stay at the 'clinic' for a day.

I can only get it back tomorrow. OH PRAY TO GOD IT DOESN'T GET REFORMATTED. ;A;

Okay, reports over. I shall change my MSN nick tomorrow. Because if i changed it from my bro's comp, everything i typed from my computer in MSN will be will be gone. D8. So i dont want that. OTL;;

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Krystal + Amber <3. My OTPPPPPP- *shot*

P/S/S: Yes, i know you guys are getting bored of me typing the same 'P/Ss' over and over again. LOL.

P/S/S/S: Now, i want to meet YUI so badly. D8

Newnewnewnew guitar! 8D

2009-10-09T19:47:00.006+08:00

I GOT MYSELF A NEW GUITAR, WOOHOO! 8D

It's an acoustic, not exactly the one i wanted but this will do. 8D

It's a Yamaha F310.

Got it in the Yamaha event held in Pyramid today. 8D

Did i mentioned it's somewhat like YUI's guitar? lD

Yeah, i have yet to find out what her Yamaha model series is like, but alot of people said that this was similar to hers. 8D. According to a forum, there was 2 model series that looked like her Yamaha guitar which is the FG402 series and F310 series. But i went for the F310 because it was on 'Happy Hour' today. 8D

And yes, it's currently right beside me. HHOHOHOHOHOHO- *shot*

Well, what was the guitar i was planning to get? I'll probably get it after i've saved up some money. XD;;

It's a Fender GA-45SCE. 8D

Sorry Paper Plane, but i guess i'll have to sacrifice my money on Fender GA-45SCE Acoutics, since i currently have an electric guitar, so it shouldn't be a problem performing next time. 8D

...I just checked YUI's guitar again, and i seriously think it's an FG402 series. D8

Oh well, this will do too since it's really similar. 8D;;

I'm still searching what's her Yamaha model series. OTL;;

Okay, rant ends here. Ciaoz. 8D

Peace. 8DDDv

P/S: Krystal + Amber <3. My OTPPPPPP- *shot*

Randomnesssss

2009-10-07T01:29:00.002+08:00

Yes, i'm bored, and also emo, and also tired...and also relieved- BLEH, me and my mixed feelings. D:

I'm really bored so im thinking of what to write now. D:

I'm tired because it's...1.33 a.m.? LOL.

I have no idea why i'm relieved. D8

I'm emo because of various of reasons, not gonna state them as it might offend people.

It's gonna be a post full of randomness, so please forgive me for typing all the crap that comes into my mind right now. *shot*

....I WANT AN ACOUSTIC GUITAR. >8I

Yeah, aimed 1 or 2 of 'em, if i couldnt find the 1st one i'm just going to aim for the 2nd one. They're about the price of the electric guitar i wanted, wow, just wow, and i'm saving up for my electric too. =A=

...I changed my mind, i want an acoustic, LOL JK. Well yeah i really want an electric guitar of my own and not borrowing my uncle's. And i DO want an acoustic because it sounds alot better and addictive compared to my classical.

So shoot me naoz. *shot*

All of a sudden im into K-pop girl dance groups( you know, the ones from SM? ), weird but still awesome, because their made of awesomesauce. Not as awesome as YUI though, hohohohohho- *shot*

I'm currently into alot of things now. D:

...And at this time of the hour, i'm actually craving for Cloud 9 chocolate, lolwhut. D8

Smack me naoz because i think i'm going crazy. D:

Overdose of YUI and K-pop drug usage? *shot*

Yes, exams are around the corner, mine's starting next week on the 14th and it ends happily on the 28th~29th(?). D:

Somehow i dont feel like studying, and i feel really happy and high for some reason? It's like i'm flying in the sky and not wanting to play my guitar and sing, not wanting to draw and stuff...seriously weird. I must be sniffing drugs while i'm asleep. D:

Goddamnit i'm so tired and i still feel like typing. I NEED CAFFEINE.

Oh, went to Pyramid today because my brother needs to go to college, so me, my mom and lil bro went to stroll around the mall, i needed pants( white ) for cosplay and i was also looking for converse shoes as my current shoes looks really...i really dont know how to describe it. OTL;;.

Couldn't find the pants, sadly, couldn't find the shoes as well but i fall in love with one of the shoes that cost a friggin' RM270, a friggin' 270 I TELL YOU. OTL;;

So yes, my mom said no to it of course, she said my father's leather shoes weren't that expensive as well, of course, his shoes was on sale so it was alot cheaper, that's just cheating. >:I

Oh well, might as well go back to Times Square to get those shoes i wanted, my dad was around so i couldn't get them. D:

I really want to do so many things right now i feel like imploding. Yes, imploding's a word, the opposite of exploding to be precise.

...No seriously, ignore my randomness. It's getting seriously random now. D8

Hmm, maybe i should start making a list of what i want to do now. Start pratcing on drawing, singing, and guitar-ing as well, studying will be done later. *SHOT*

Now, i need money, i'm trying to sell the stuff i have now to earn my money back. OTL;;

...It's 2.17 now, and i'm sleepy, but i dont want to go to bed. D:. Bad habit that i must really change. D:

Yes i believe i just wrote this above but if you're really wondering why i'm emo, it could be my current situation of being so random now, there, ya' happy? There's more, not stating as it might offend people.

I'm guessing it's getting really random now, so i better stop. orz;;

Peace. :Dv

P/S: ...Acoustic guitarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. =A=( I still remember the time where i used to moan for electric guitars here, LOL. )

P/S/S: Krystal + Amber <3. My OTPPPPPPP- *shot*

Reportsss And i need you help!

2009-10-05T13:37:00.002+08:00

GUYS GUYS GUYS HELP ME VOTE FOR YUI HERE. ;A;

USE AS MANY EMAIL ACCOUNTS YOU HAVE, FOR YUI! PLEASE I BEG YOU ON MY KNEES. ;A;

http://www.channelv.com/rde/v/3564_3567.htm

Copy and paste kthnxbai. 8Db

So anyway, sang during saturday, awkward is awkward, didnt expect myself to sing in a different style, was suppose to sing nicely but got disturbed by uncle so i sang some parts wrongly. OTL;;

And today, my friend, the short-tempered one, came and ask,

'Settle ah?'

I was like sure okay, but, like i said, not gonna be as close as last time. XD;;

Okay that's about it, will have to go practice on YUI songs now. 8Db

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: DONT FORGET TO VOTE FOR YUI! I BEG YOU! ;A;

Pissed Maybe?

2009-10-02T14:37:00.008+08:00

Yes, i'm pissed. Why?

Hmm, I did my moral essays like i was told, and despite the stomach cramps i had, i did 2 essays, next morning, i gave it both essays to teacher, here's how the conversation goes.

*hands in paper*

'Where's the rest?'

'Next week.'

'Photos?'

'Not yet take.'

*puts down her books made out of crap with a loud thud, crosses hands and walked pass me as if i never existed.*

....Nah. =.=olo

Okay fine, she doesnt want those papers why didnt she told me earlier? Lol, wasted my time. =.=

Well, it seemed okay in school for the whole day, i didnt talk to them at all. XD;;

But i got the news about them backstabbing me when i was absent yesterday. XD;;

Well, they're always like that, when they're really close with that certain person, they wouldnt dare say a thing and would be so nice and would hang out with you, on the other hand, if you're not with them anymore, they start gossiping and backstabbing about you.

They even showed me faces.

So called 'Dont get us wrong! We're still your friends!' huh? XD;;

For me, it's over, lol. I dont care a shit they do anymore. They think they're oh so angelic but reality wise, they're bitches. D:. Mind my language. XD;;

They still want me to change though, sure, i'll change, when i reincarnate that is. :P

Yeah was sad after that i knew they backstabbed me. But was happy again after that. 8D

Why?

Well, as usual, every Friday, the music club in our school will always be having activities. So i took the guitar from the store where they stored drums in it too, and started playing, i never touched the drums sadly. OTL;;. Maybe wasn't in the mood. XD;;

So i started singing songs that would soothe me down, my senior friend( the one who also teached me how to play the drums ) popped in after hearing me play Rolling Star by YUI, though i didnt sing because i wasnt sure how the lyrics go. XD;;

She got excited and started singing the song so i play along, strumming all the way. LOL.

And then she asked me what other songs i knew by YUI, so i played a few songs and sing for her. She said it was hard to find anyone who's obsessed with YUI, LOL. 8D

So yeah after singing here and there, she praised my singing and how i strummed the guitar, i was, well out of words, LOL. Because her praise was well, unexpected actually. XD;;

'You can be the next YUI already! You sound like her, your expressions when you play are just like hers, the only thing missing is that you dont look like her! Gah, if only you looked like her.'

LOL, OTL;;.

My first time getting a praise like that. OTL;;. Nuuu~ i shouldnt be compared with YUI. ;A;. YUI's way more awesome than my everything. ;A;

Well, thanks to that praise, i've gotten happy again and there was nothing to worry about, especially when i think about YUI supporting me. 8D;; *shot*

So yeah, it seems like a fine day today too. 8D

Actually when i got to school i was kinda nervous. XD;;

Because well, after what happened, i didnt dare face them, now it's like, nothing. LOL.

I just realized they're the baddies too. XD;;

And yes dear god, i finally noticed i mixed with the wrong people, they're just using me, yes i know. LOL.

Well that's all for today, gotta practice for tomorrow's performance. OTL;;.

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I really want to get an acoustic guitar now. *shot*. Well it's sound quality is good and loud, better than my classical, and yes i know i've been requesting alot of things lately, LOL. OTL;;

P/S/S: Krystal + Amber <3

Betrayed

2009-09-30T08:42:00.008+08:00

Been awhile since i updated any artworks ye?

Well yes, i feel betrayed. Why?

Because i supported my friend the other time and now when i need her support, she friggin' sided my 'so called' friend and sounder. Lol.

Now a few lessons i learned.
1. Never support any of my friends in that gang anymore.
2. Never put my trust on them so easily.
3. Always learn to stand up for myself.
4. If they messed with me... Would i still get scared of them? LOL.
5. Never ever let them take advantage of me just because i have a weak heart and a generous person. OTL;;
6. Never ever be afraid.

They're the type of people who likes to gossip and backstab people. Not my type to hang out with. D:

Took me a day to think if i was wrong saying rashful things to them, but even though i think i'm right and i shouldnt be saying sorry to them, i sms-ed them and told them i'm sorry anyway, lol.

I dont want to lose them, because i have my reasons. LOL. Even though if i'm still with them, i wont hang out with them as much as i used too anymore. XD;;

I probably cant do most of the things i mentioned above. LOL. I'm just too afraid of them. D:

Sucks, really wish i was staying in Subang and not in KL. D:

I told my problems to alot of people, and they're telling me,

'...Are these really your friends?'

'They're not treating you the right way, you shouldn't be treated like this.'

'They're going TOO overboard as being this 'true' friends thing, i dont even think they're true friends, if they really are your true friends, they should be thinking of you too.'

'Do you want to be with them and be sad again later on or be sad now and be happy later on because you left them? This people cant be called friends.'

'Omg, just because of homework they're doing this to you? Unbelievable, lol.'

'If they're treating you like this then what about us? We even bullied the teachers we're uncomfortable with in our school! If we were in your place we could've been worst, LOL.'

'...That's just slack. D:'

I'm not kidding this are what my friends really said. LOL.

Well, at least im a wee bit brave enough to enter school now? XD;;

Because i know there are other people who's still beside me and supporting me. 8D

Even though these people arent treating me right, i still treated them as a friend because i dont like losing friends, reason why i cried so much the other day. OTL;;

I'll let them assume whatever they want, i'll let them assume that im scared of them, but i know i'm not. Somewhere deep in me though. LOL.

Someday, if i become famous over something, i'll say i know these people and these are the people that brought me down but i still stuck with them like glue because i dont like the thought of losing my friends, they didnt appreciate of what and who i am and wanted me to change, to someone who would study, do every homework given by the teachers, and probably teacher's pet? LOL, now that i think about it, it is slack. D:. I was planning to say that i dont know them. LOL. But that's really harsh? I dont know which is harsher though. LOL.

This might sound hilarious and almost impossible but i think i want to be a singer and a manga artist? OTL;;

I kinda got motivated into being a singer because of this wee problem. LOL. So i can go to them and say HAH, IN YO FACE! >8D LOL. Yes, i am that evil. XD;;

Well, i'm not as sad as i think i am now, just a bit of this and that, you know, mixed feelings. XD;;

That's about it, will blog more tomorrow i guess. 8D.

Peace. 8Dv

EDIT:

Well, I sms-ed my friends a while ago, around 9.30 or something, and was very glad i could clear some things up, because i needed to tell them that i wont be able to change to the person they want me to be and such. They told me they wont change their mind unless i change, so i told them i understand their decision as i understand mine and asked how do we settle this, she told me to leave it as it'll be.

My another friend is mad and disappointed at me, but, if she's mad and disappointed i cant do anything, i'm just glad i was able to tell them what i felt. 8D. Maybe she's just not matured enough to just forget about it, well she does have the attitude of a child i suppose, but im not blaming her, just saying maybe she isn't as matured as i thought she'd be even though she's the type that studies and finishes her homework. XD;;. If you're wondering if we're still friends, i can only say we're between the borderline? XD;;. At least there's a new opened path for me to walk into. 8D

I dont have to walk in this road full with despair and disappointment anymore for now, i shall now strive what i want to do, looking forward into the future. 8D

Because of them, i couldn't do anything much and alot of stuff that i was interested was fading away, now i can chase all those stuff back again. 8D

For some weird reason, i always whine about how i would disappoint people, but now, i'm just glad and relaxed. 8D. Must be the song i'm currently listening to. XD;;

'Let it Out' by Miho Fukuhara.

2nd Ending of FMA : Brotherhood. Very nice song to listen to, makes you think of yourself in a land full flowers and you're just laying there and looking at the beautiful sky. 8D. If you're down, listen to this song, dont read the translations of the lyrics first, LOL. The song gives out a blast of... i dunno what do you call it, LOL, but it's like no matter what happens, there'll always be someone supporting you. 8D. And when you get that feeling go read the translations, it's similar to what i typed, but, think of that other person in the lyrics as your friend or whoever you think may support you. 8D

I recommend you to listen to 'I'll be' by YUI.

Has alot of meaning, like i said in my previous post, she healed my soul when i was down and sad, of course, that was after i read the translations of most of her lyrics. 8D

You dont have to always think that the other person is a lover or anything in a certain lyrics just because it contains lovey dovey stuff, it can be whoever you think will support you in your life. 8D

I've been thinking, and maybe i do want to be a singer, to give inspirational and motivational( is there even such word as motivational, LOL. ) music like YUI. 8D

And go part time drawing mangas as i like because i did say i want to be a manga artist, i'm not gonna let that go to waste. 8D. Even if i dont get my stuff published, i can always have it posted as a webcomic. 8D

Yes, alot of '8Ds', and you'll be seeing alot more on the way, LOL, i'm just very very glad and happy( and the song i'm listening to is giving me some spirit, it's the same song btw, LOL. ) i could tell them how i felt. 8D

Though, the problem now is, how am i going to meet them in school. LOL. Well it shouldnt be a problem now. 8D. Just that i can go back to my last year self again, where i'm always left alone to draw while my friends chat beside me. 8D

But i dont think i want to go to school 'till next week, because if i were to look at them, you'll never know i'll go sad again and maybe break down. LOL. It happens, you'll never know. XD;;

From now and then, everytime when i'm down, i'll think of the people who'll support me in my life and be there for me when i needed them, and listen to songs that strives me. 8D

As most of you know me, i'm not the type to do my homework given by the teacher or study, but, even though i dont do them and maybe i'm just a sloth, i'm still good at heart, and i'm not boasting! I'm proud of it! 8D. Not doing my homework or study are just my really bad qualities that i should somehow gradually change in the future. 8D

I'm so glad and happy now, i dont know what i want to say anymore. 8D

I'll just leave it here as it is. 8D

Peace. >8Dv

'Everything's solved, a new path is opened, what lies beyond are new things that i shall soon venture, and i shall walk this new path with no regrets at heart.'

P/S: The quote above i wrote is inspired by the song i'm still listening to, Let it Out by Miho Fukuhara. :'Db *shot*

P/S/S: 3 more days 'till i perform for my family. OTL;;. You have no friggin' idea how many relatives i have. =A=

P/S/S/S: My Saber Lily ~Distant Avalon~ PVC arrived but it's still with my supplier. OTL;;. Because i still owe him/her RM300++?? OTL;;

P/S/S/S/S: I'm saving money for both Nendoroids, PVCs and the upcoming CF 09, i dont think i can save enough money by then, like how i couldn't sleep for a day last year, counting the amounts of money i'll need before CF. LOL.

Better

2009-09-29T17:23:00.004+08:00

Hi guys. 8D

Yeah i feel alot better. XD;;

I've been listening to alot of YUI songs, and reading the translations on most of her lyrics, and they're really meaningful, it's like YUI telling me to keep going on and she'll support me, LOL cheesy i know but it's true. 8D

YUI healed my soul. :D

I've been telling my problems to a foreign friend of mine and i feel better as she kept supporting me and advicing me what and not to do. 8D

Well, i cried alot last night, my eyes are still swollen since morning, LOL. But i think i might be able to forget them. And i saw this coming anyway. XD;;

They told me true friends should care each other and stick with each other. Well, i understand this statement, and it's true. But somewhat, they're boycotting me because i dont do my moral homework? They cant see that im doing them now though, lol.

Well i dont blame them, my moral teacher's the one to be blamed, she planned all this with my friends so i cant blame my friends. XD;;. Though i dont like the way my friends sms-ed me last night, i wrote nothing but decent words, and she had to use the word 'bloody' in it. Well, what can i say, she's easily short-tempered? XD;;

I am to forget about this people, even though they still say they're my friends, but they dont care a shit on what i do, 'true' friends they are. XD;;

When they fought with me last night, they're like, Mother Theressa, LOL. Oh so pure, oh so good and telling me about this and that, that this is for my own good, 2 words, MY FOOT.

But I also said things i shouldnt last night, i was motivated by another friend of mine though, LOL. She told me,

'She keeps showing you who's boss, now it's your turn to show who's boss.'

Motivating words no? XD;;

And so i've been boycotted and scolded by them, so? Is this the end of the world? No.

Because i realized, if i were to make up with them, i would be sad again later on, for sure i know it. So i decided, maybe it's time to stop being friends with them, even though i hanged out with them for a long time, but im always treated the wrong way. I get all tensed when i sit beside them, im not able to express my true self, it sucks really.

I cried so much last night with mixed feelings, thinking maybe what i did was wrong, and the memories we spent the laughter we had, but then i think again, there were also times i was treated the wrong way, always getting scolded for doing something they dont like, always criticized by them for doing something they dont like.

Well, these are KL people, what more can i do?

So now, if i were to make up with them, i dont think i'd be as close with them as usual, because the 'me' they know, has already died. They killed it.

And yes, about the moral teacher, i might do something about it. Something shocking? Surprising? We'll never know, lol. Because of her, the 'me' died. And because of this, she'll regret messing with me. Just because i couldnt finish the moral essays on time, she has to do something like this. I curse her upcoming generations to fail SPM berturut-turut for 7 years, LOL. Line taken by my BM tuition teacher. XD;;

Hmm, i dont think i want to go to school anymore, yes im scared, scared to face them, after the fight we had, i dont want to know what faces they'll show me when i enter school, i dont want to hear the backstabbing they're gonna throw at me. So, i didnt go to school today, and so will tomorrow, because im sick, LOL. Gotcha didnt i? XD;;

But yeah, i just wish school would end real fast. It's like a living hell for me now. XD;;

I just hope that moral teacher doesnt teach me for another year next year, or it'll be just suicide, LOL.

Well, that's about it, i got another 'day-off' tomorrow, so i'm gonna enjoy it while i can. 8Db

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I'm well, still sad, but i have this rather mixed feelings of happy, lonely, furious, and glad? LOL.

Boycott

2009-09-28T22:44:00.002+08:00

I've been boycotted by my cheras friends for not finishing my homework. Should i be happy or not?

I think i'm both? I'm happy that im not hanging out with them, like really glad and happy, but i'm sad too.

I fought with them a while ago through text messaging.

I almost attempted suicide.

They're doing this because my moral teacher told them to. I already knew this, this morning.

I dont want to go school anymore, i want to stop going to school...

I feel hurt when i lose friends just like that...

So many mixed feelings inside of me...

...I dont know where else to go and who to talk to anymore...

My friends are being aggressive at me, they showed me looks, i really really dont know what to do...

I miss Subang so damn much... I want to go back there and study again... I hate it here...

I wanted to show you the messages we fought but i deleted it by accident as my inbox was piling up...

Now i just dont know what to do...

.....

Wristbands!

2009-09-26T21:24:00.003+08:00

I got myself new wristbands! 8D

2 of 'em too. 8D

A checkered pattern and a 'piano keys' pattern. 8D

Gonna use them for my later on recordings. 8Db

Yes im in love with stuff like that now. XD;;

Oh and i got my friend, Sam to help me out with my moral essays! 8D

I'm copying his actually, LOL. OTL;;

Eventhough he gave me 2, i'm still SOOO darn grateful for him. ;A;

He just saved half of my lifespan. LOL. *shot*

Ok then, 'till here, ciaoz. 8D

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I love my wristbands. ;A;

YUIYUIYUIYUI- foams

2009-09-25T20:29:00.002+08:00

Yes, i dreamt of YUI last night/this morning. I'm typing this now because i just remembered the scene about few hours ago and decided to type it now, LOL. orz;;

I dunno how it all started, but i met YUI? And i played with her? LOL. Actually well, i was shy at first and then after that i played with her. LOL. And she did a very cute double peace sign pose on her head( YUI fans knows this. ). If i remembered correctly there was more to this, but i cant seem to get the scene right. =A=

AND YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH I WISH THAT DREAM WAS REAL. QAQ

Gah, it just makes me want to meet YUI so much now. .___.

Oh yeah guys, remember the previous post? Yeah i made a song for it. 8D;;

Im currently making the lyrics and i dont plan to keep this one for long because the lyrics sucks big time. orz;;

But i like the chord coordinations though. 8Db

I just wish i have YUI's composing music skills. =A=

Okay, that's about it. Just wanted to type out today's dream so i can look for it and remember what i dreamt about. :Db

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Ish craving for Nendoroids and PVCs now, but Nendos come first since PVCs are expenshuive. :3

Be myself

2009-09-25T00:05:00.003+08:00

I know i've said this a million times, but my Cheras friends sucks so much. =A=

Take this for example.

If i dont do my homework( which i usually dont ), they wont talk to you and they have this attitude where they wont want to be your friend anymore.

...Motherly much?

Well, i know this is what people should take example for as a friend, but to be honest, it sucks, like really. D:

And if i argue with a teacher( which i usually do if i dont like the teacher and the teacher is taking advantage of me as being the really-goody-two-shoes around, which only happens to one teacher i currently hate the most. ), same example as the above, they wont talk to you, they 'dont' even care. =A=

Whut else? Yeah, in Cheras, your friends take advantage of you?

Like really. =A=

They lends your money, like a few cents. And of course you'd be expecting for them to pay you back?

In Cheras, it's a different story, lol.

Not that im making a fuss, i just find it annoying?

Because they said the word 'lend', instead of 'spare'. So okay i LENT them, next thing they'll say,

'Like that also want to return ah? Fine la! Later pay you back la! Damn calculative.'

...Okay, because of that, i'm now afraid of my friends. =A=

And also because of that, i'm becoming more generous and is too afraid to say the word 'no'. OTL;;

As you can see here, im only complaining about my Cheras friends now because well, the major differences of last years friends and this years, is a total 'call for help' situation. And yes, i need to get out from this school, fast and quick.

Last year, my Cheras friends were more like my Subang friends? More laid back, not as OVER strict like the current one?

That's why i prefer my chinese friends in Cheras more than my current ones. So annoying and yet not a single topic to talk about. Because im the only otaku around them and it makes it weird to be around them, like awkwarddd.

When i was with my chinese friends, it's a whole different story, i can be myself, i can relax and not get tensed talking about stuff to them. But now it's like, a pack of mothers around me. Yes, pack, lol.

Everyday it's boys, boys and boys. When it comes to studying, the atmosphere around them is serious, it gets me so tensed. I just wish i wasn't stuck in this dreaded class with these people. It's not very comfortable.

And when you cant do something they'll go,

'Ala, you everytime also like that one la, cannot do this, cannot do that.'

If you guys know me well enough, i'm a sloth. I dont do my homework, i dont study( I need to change this attitude of mine. orz;; ). All i do is play, sleep, eat and potty-pooing.

And now i just wish Raya holidays were to be longer, or what's best, just after the final exam, i could just stay at home and sloth around the house. I dont want to see my Cheras friends, they annoy me and irritate me.

They said i annoy them and irritate them by not doing my homework and not studying. Huh, what joke, they annoy and irritate me too.

I just wanna be myself. Not what im unsatisfied of being with.

'It's hard to pretend to be someone normal, so i just be me!'

Great quote from a class T-shirt i saw from the seniors.

Although the fact i keep telling myself, they did it for my own good and such, but it always annoys me to be the one apologizing them about stuff like why i dont do my homework, it's really low and sickening of me, it's like, i owe them or something.

I dont care if i lose them, i didnt have friends in Cheras to start with.

...But seriously, i need to get started with that 7 moral essays, or my moral teacher would fry me, again. And if i dont do it, i could just go and slit my wrist.

My current Cheras friends, each one of them, has a boyfriend. Lol? So imagine the amount of girly topics i have to endure. =A=

And the amount of saliva i wasted on telling them something and being ignored at the same time or they would give this half smile and a half laugh and then start off with another topic? Yeah, now when i think about it, i've got a year more to endure this hell of bombarding girly topics? OTL;;

...You know what, maybe slitting my wrist ain't such a bad idea. *shot*

I mean yeah, people will come telling me, just ignore them, but you know, if i dont talk something that i want to talk about, i could just implode.

And yes, i rarely draw, it's because of them too. It's hard, like so hard. Everytime i draw they'll go,

'Dont draw already la, do your homework.'

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-OH how i wish i could just end my life, or how i wish i could just stop school and go to work and earn money and use them on so many unimaginable things. =A=

Well, at least my last year chinese Cheras friends DOESNT DO THE THINGS I MENTIONED ABOVE. >8C

I really wish i could just hang out with them. D:

But now there's like no topic to talk about, i felt like crying everytime i try to talk to them, LOL. So awkward to find a random topic and to speak in chinese with them in my chinglish language. ;A;

...You know, i could actually go on ranting and ranting about my current Cheras friends, but it's best if i do not bore you guys with more of my ranting. 8D;;

Peace. :Dv

P/S: HELPPPUU. ;A;

Surprise surprise hmm?

2009-09-19T15:49:00.002+08:00

Here ya go. :'D

Haha, yeahhhhh. lD Messed up alot at the end. Sorry. ;A; Got it last Friday from my uncle. 8D.

I heard the news during last Tuesday from my uncle that if i was interested in lending his electric guitar, my mom was beside me too. He asked me in MSN. And once i saw the message he sent me, i literally SQUEALED for the first time in my life. LOL.

I dropped to the floor with tears of joy, ran down stairs and around the kitchen and ran back up to the computer table. And said 'Thanks loads.'. LOL.

So yeah, i'm now in charge of taking care of his guitar while i earn some money for the one i'm aiming. 8Db

This guitar cost way more money than the one i'm aiming, like tonnes. oAo

And since i showed you guys the surprise, not really surprising eh? XD;;

Okay then, that's about today, need to go play more YUI songs. lDb

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: The video above is just for the sake of showing you guys the surprise. LOL. OTL;;. It wasn't very good. ;A;. Sorry. ;A;. I'll show you guys a better video of me playing next time. 8Db;; *shot*

Hehe hoho haha

2009-09-18T22:12:00.002+08:00

Yeah, out of titles to think of. OTL;;

Here's a lil' video to sweep off the previous negative posts. XD;;

Yushu, was practicing. And here's the proof that i play them. >8Db

Sorry if you couldn't hear the beats and the rhythms properly. XD;;

Well, err, i think it's best if i stayed at home during the holidays. =A=

First off, moral project homework, yes i skipped class during Thursday, so my moral teacher wouldn't eat me up later on. =.=

Second, it's boring to go outside nowadays. D:

That's about it. lolz. XD;;

Err well, whut else?

Yadda yadda yadda, yes i promised you guys a surprise, and yes i delayed it. OTL;;

Will post it up tomorrow if i found a way on how to do it. D8

Yeah, been drawing recently too, but not posting it up. XD;;

Too many privacy needed. OTL;;

Im currently emo too, so yeah not gonna get that emo-ness kill me. XD;;

Im gonna enjoy my holidays. >8Db

So enjoy your Raya holidays guys! 8D

Peace. lDv

P/S: Happy holidays! 8Dv

Abandoned

2009-09-15T14:05:00.002+08:00

I...did something bad today...

...And...everyone hated me...

...I'm left out...

.....

...In this everlasting cruel world again...

..I feel cold...very cold...

.......

...I'm afraid.....That my old jerkself would arise again...

I...dont want to go to school anymore.....

.....I'm scared.....

.......

Sadness, Despair

2009-09-14T15:15:00.002+08:00

...I dont have any friends..

...i made all of them hate me...

..I cant do anything...I'm useless...

.....

My friends hate me...

...I'm a weirdo...a jerk...

........

Wow 1 in the morn. LOL.

2009-09-12T01:13:00.002+08:00

Yeap, not sleepy. XD;;

Let's forget about the previous post, i know my parents and friends will always love and care for me, escpecially my family, i've always kept that in mind. :Db

Yes, i'm also bored, heading to bed soon. XD;;

And good news guys! My little surprise shall be shown in...a few more hours later or tomorrow. LOL. orz;;

Yes, the party pooper i am. XD;;

Hmm, never went to school this week, excluding Tuesday. XD;;

Weird, it's the only week that i feel like going to school's a bore. D8

Kayz, sleepy now, LOL.

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Surprise, surprise~! 8Db

Insulted

2009-09-10T22:38:00.006+08:00

"Hey, just go get your guitar and stay under a tunnel, pull a box where people can put money inside and start doing your thing like those Singaporeans. You dont seem to study and pay attention while in class or tuition."

"Why didnt you follow and quit tuition like your friends did? You're not even studying while you're in tuition. Just talk and talk."

"What finals? You're gonna show me red marks on that report card again?"

"You should stay with your uncle! Your attitude's and his are just alike! Lazy and smelly! And you only know how to argue!"

"I'll tolerate you for one more year, if i get poor results from you, you're out of the house! I wont accept you in this household anymore! I'll kick you out of here!"

...

.....

.........

They never will believe in me now will they?

.......

They never did.

Their words stung like a venom from a cobra's fangs.

They will always insult me with words that stung. It's like this from the very beginning.

I dont care if it was my own good, even if it was, i dont care. They never praised me. Never did.

....I feel so lonely, depressed and unloved right now. They dont have a tiny bit of trust in me anymore, they dont root for me in big exams. I thought i got used to it for them not rooting and trusting me, but i just couldnt bare the thought that other people are getting praises from their parents.

"You can do it!" they'll say. But not mine, ever. I'll never get them to praise me, ever.

I payed attention in tuition and in class and especially on the important ones, i did, i swear. But all my parents could say that i actually talk in class when they actually never went to tuition or class with me.

People tend to change, they dont stay the same.

I tend to sleep in class sometimes, and get scolded by my friends but i know it's for my own good, so i woke up and started paying attention again without falling back to sleep, i tried really hard not to sleep, i did. And if i dont do any of my homework, my friends shook their heads.

...But my friends are just the same. And i dont care if they care for me, i just dont. I tried my best to do everything and both parents and friends...are just the same.

...

........

Peace.

P/S: Crying, silently.

P/S/S: I dont care if they ever cared for me, loved me, or actually being really supportive of me, i just dont care right now, those arent the things i want to think of right now.

Surprise? Oh really?

2009-09-08T14:29:00.002+08:00

Haha, yes, i've got a surprise for everyone, not gonna state it today though, maybe some other time. >8D. Yes i'm being evil for leaving all of you in suspense. >lD *shot*

Whoever asks me what's the surprise, i ain't telling, if i told you guys, why would people want to call it a 'surprise' now, amiright? lDb

Though i'll give you guys a hint, "money". It's the best i could give. XD;;. But once you guys found out what the surprise is, surely most of you would say, 'cheh...'. LOL. Really common and obvious answer for some of us here no? XD;;

Okay, passed up my moral project today, though i only did 1, LOL. I promised teacher to give the other 7 later on. XD;;

Hmm what else?

Yes, went to Kinokuniya on Sunday, bought 2 books, one of it was a Disney songs fingerstyling guitar book, while the other one was a Kuroshitsuji illustration book or something. XD;;

I'm able to play most of the songs in the Disney fingerstyling book now! 8Db

Anddd tomorrow, my school's asked to sing a song for the '09 event. My school's one of the chosen 891 organisations i think? Lol, i dont really care 'bout this stuff, i dont feel like going school tomorrow anyway. DX

School's getting boring nowadays, dont know why. D8

There doesnt seem to be any topics to talk about in school, it's just, plain old boring. D8

Bleh, i'm so tired too, must be the time i slept last night working my ass off on one moral essay. =A=

Meh, gonna go look for some songs to play the guitar with, then i'm probably off to my hibernating session. XD;;

Peace. :'Dv

Yayee yayee~

2009-09-05T23:36:00.006+08:00

To be honest, i prefer all my sketches than my CG-ed art, it really destroys the 'expressions' that i want to show. My sketchies are alot better than my CG-ed art.

Needed a new ID in deviantART. :Db

Mom and big bro's coming back from Taiwan tomorrow, yayz, i miss my mumzies. :'D

And while i was playing and singing Bolero by DBSK with the guitar, i cant help but think about my moral teacher humiliating me in front of the class. D:

It's really disturbing, lol.

I need to get her damned work done. =A=

Actually i didnt bother finishing it up 'cos i wasnt interested in the subject and the teacher. But i'm forced to anyway. =A=

On another topic, my days are getting dull, there's so many things im getting bored of, it's like i dont want to do this, i dont want to do that. I'm seriously lifeless. LOL.

Hmm, i do feel like trying out new stuff, not sure what myself though, since i DO try out new stuff. LOL. orz;;

Hmm anyway, onto something else.

Ahh~ YUI's so cute. ;A;b

I seriously want to meet her in real life, it'd be awesome if i did. D8>

I'd probably squeal if i did. LOL. OTL;;

She's just too awesomeeeeeeeeeeee. ;w;b

The more i look at her MV's the more i get inspired of being a singer and just being able to meet her, she's just so inspirational. ;w;. So awesome. ;w;b

Okay. I better stop rambling on her, or i'll never stop, because i've got alot more to describe about her. LOL. orz;;

Anyway, nothing much to report again today, as usual, it's another dull day.

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: YUI's awesome, dattebayo! *SHOT*

Weee~

2009-09-04T13:33:00.004+08:00

Yes, am bored, so i'm gonna randomly ramble on what i've done for the week. XD;;

Hmm, first off, would like to rant on my stupid fishing freaking moral teacher.

She's a person who is desperate of people to wish her 'Selamat Sejahtera.', like 'the hell?

What's more, she humiliated me in front of the class for not doing her work. Like 'the hell, made me made an oath too, to pass it up on monday. =A=

Out of all the teachers, this is the only one that i dare to go rebellious on. She's pushing her luck on me, once i'm at my breaking point, i swear, she gets it. I'm gonna scratch her car when i'm out of school. >8Db *SHOT*

And i wanted to tell her politely if i could delay 'till next week, guess she needs to use the hard way by humiliating me. =.=

Okay, dont want to spoil the mood, let's go on with something else. XD;;

Hmm, probably getting an electric guitar this year! Awesome no? 8Db

Talked it out with my mom, she said she'll have to take a look at my final exam results, and how i behave first. XD;;

And yes, im confirmed that i'll be bringing my guitar to SMK USJ 13's Carnival Day for a small street live hopefully, and if i actually have the guts to perform that is. XD;;. Friends from SMK USJ 13 might be able to see me play the drums during their carnival, since there would be drums for us to play. 8Db. Hopefully the line doesnt get long though, or i wont be able to play. ;A;

Oh, another week's holiday is coming up this month, around Hari Raya Adilfitri, just to inform you guys. :'Db

And nowww i'm able to play and sing Bolero by DBSK and Michi to you all by Aluto with the guitar. Awesome no? :'Db

'Kay, nothing else to report, gonna post up an artwork tomorrow. :Db

Peace. :Dv

Oh hai thar

2009-08-30T12:58:00.002+08:00

Sorry that i havent been updating much, streamyx got busted for a few days, and there isnt anything much to write. XD;;

So anyways, hmm, i dreamt about having an Epiphone Les Paul and my mom hooked up the price at RM100, cool no?

But too bad, it's only a dream. D:

I remember dreaming about wanting to blog about the situation, but when i got up, im like 'aww man, it's only a dream?'.

So yeah there you have it. If it became a reality, i am lost for words. XD;;

Hmm, what else happened?

Oh yes, bought 2 new shirts from SUB in Pyramid. Since it's new and it got opened recently, might as well buy 2 new shirts. :'Db. Go there and get some awesome clothes! 8D;; *shot ~~for promoting uncle's store~~*

Hmm, nothing else happened i guess. D:

Well, you can see how bored i am at home during the holidays, nothing to do. D:

OH, played P4 again, for the 4th time. :Db

Died alot more than before. And i only have that one last revival thingy. D:

My 3rd play has like, 8 of those revival thingies. lol. D:

Well, that's all for the report during holidays, boring no? XD;;

Peace. :Dv

W.I.P :Db

2009-08-21T13:28:00.004+08:00

Work in Progress, yush. :Db

It's gonna be my deviantART's ID. 8D

Working on it soon. :D

I probably might work on the character designs one by one for the band. XD;;

Oh, guys, i might not have enough money to spend during CF '09 ~~and probably not enough to buy a guitar~~. OTL;;

Why? Because i'm pre-ordering on so many Figurines and Nendoroids. OTL;;

Well at least i'm gonna pay the deposit first, so i could pay the items one by one while i collect some cash(OTL;;). 8Db;;

...What? I couldn't resist. D8> *shot*

Oh and another thing i forgot to mention, I'm going to Sunway Pyramid tomorrow probably. :'D

Who am i going with? No one. Yes, no one. XD;;

I'm going alone, no friends and family. :'D

Actually i invited a few friends of mine to tag along but since because of that recent H1N1 cases, they seem to be afraid to go. Well it's okay, since it's a little too dangerous to go out. XD;;

And because of that, i wanted to try out how is it to be going out alone shopping. 8D. Yes the risk of it. *shot*

...There could be a possibility that im not going. LOL. orz;;

Meh, i'm not sure what to do now, so confused. =A=. XD;;

Peace. :Dv

DEW NIU NIU- shot + Reports

2009-08-19T22:27:00.004+08:00

Lead guitarist and the founder of the band known as "Paper Plane", yours truly. :'D *brick'd*

I tried CG-ing anime style but phailed miserably. orz;;

And yes, i couldn't think of a background. orz;;

I actually have that beanie. 8D;;

I drew whatever i have in my wardrobe. orz;;

Andddd the band might be performing during CF '10.

So if we do perform, do drop by and give us some support. 8DDDDD- *shot*

Though it's still a year away~ orz;; *shot*

Okay other than that, we'll go on with some other stuff that i'd like to talk about. :'D

Random, but yes, i've got a checkered fetish, i love checkered stuff. :D

And to SMK USJ 12-ians, i would like to say R.I.P to Miss Chai, even i do not know who she is, but still, she teached maths for a few friends of mine. :D

Kementerian pendidikan sucks and so is the Malaysian goverment. D:

When they say they could control the recent cases of H1N1, look what happens? So many people are dying and yet they barely made a move. D:

Parents suggested that the goverment should close all schools and cinemas in Malaysia for at least a month so that the H1N1 disease would stop spreading.

Guys, take care of yourselves, drink or eat more Vitamin C, it really helps. :Db

On the other hand, i'm addicted to PVC figurines and Nendoroids. If you're wondering what are those, they're like action figures except they're not de-tachable, more like statues, Nendoroids are lil cute figures, chibi i shall say. :'D

Might be recycling my cosplay costumes next year, to save up money so i can use it on PVCs and Nendoroids. :'D

Recently, my drawing mood has been activated, as in, i have that old drawing sensation again. 8D

And yes, there is a possibility that i might start working on one of my mangas. 8Db

So many stuff i gotta start working on. D8

My drawing skills kinda went a lil' bit rusty, i havent been drawing much, so that explains that. :'D

Hmm, guess that's about it.

Peace. :'Dv

Guide and Experience on Guitars

2009-08-16T17:33:00.004+08:00

Yush, im gonna give a lil' guide and experience i have about guitars. Head back or close the window if you dont want to read about it. :'D

I'm doing this because i'm extremely bored. orz;;

Andd yes, it's about classical, acoustic and electric guitars. :'D

Classical guitar strings are harder to press, but less painful because the strings are made from nylon. And their necks is a bit wider.

Acoustic guitar strings are easier to press, but alot more painful because the strings are made from steel. Their necks is a bit thinner. I'm not sure about this, LOL. It could be harder to press. D8 I'm gonna go have a test run with the acoustics in my school next Friday, so stay tune. :'D *shot*

Electric guitar strings are easier to press too, and also less painful, but the strings are also made from steel, plus, the guitar's heavy. Their necks are thin and a lil' longer like acoustics.

Keep in mind, if you have not touch any of the other guitars, whichever guitar you're gonna play for the first time, will be painful at first. :'D

The pain would last for a few days, and your fingertips will have calculus, or whatever you call it, LOL. It's a thing where your fingertips go 'harden'.

When it's 'harden', your fingertips would be immune to the pain while you press the guitar strings. :'D

Anddd you can play songs with your guitar happily, LOL.

Wait, there's still strumming. :'D

And yes, for strumming, we use 'picks'. 8D

For me, i'd prefer strumming with my own fingers, but i use picks too. :'D

There are types of picks for every certain type of guitar. 8D

I play the Classical, so i use the soft type. You could use the hard type to produce a louder tone, but if you're gonna sing while you play, preferably the soft, because if you use the hard type, it'd be hard to hear your sing!

Hard type picks, are mostly made for either electric guitars or bass guitars. I'm not sure about acoustics because i've never came across people holding picks for acoustics.

And yes, fingers, i'd use fingers because if you play a song which lasts 3 or 4 minutes with a pick, the pick might just slip off from your fingers. It's either because your finger's are sweating or you strummed the guitar just a lil too hard with the pick.

And for strumming patterns, there arent any certain strumming patterns actually. You just strum the guitar the way you feel like strumming. 8D

I looked for strumming patterns too when i first played the guitar, but sometimes i just couldn't look for the right strumming patterns, so i strummed them how i like it to be strummed. 8D

Sometimes the strumming patterns that you play might not fit that particular song, but it still sounds the same as long as you pressed the chords right, but if you think the strumming sounds wrong for that particular song, fiddle around and listen to the song carefully till you get the right rhythm. 8D

Andd that's about just my knowledge and experience i have on guitars. :'D

Might update another post later on. Cant think of what i did recently. D8 *shot*

Peace. :'D

P/S: Happy playing/learning! 8D Although it's not good, but i hope it did something. XD;;

Whut?

2009-08-13T23:02:00.003+08:00

Yeah, 'whut?' indeed.

Well im here to voice out something, that i've just found out recently.

Well do you guys still remember this?

Yeah, i've heard someone is going around telling people that i stoled the idea of drawing this and the person i drew in this piece was his/her original character that belongs to his/her own written novel?

This is not a big problem though, but it did made me a tinsy bit pissed.

Hopefully, he/she doesnt take it further, or i'll have to take actions on this certain person.

And for your information, it was my idea and my character.

I am not free to go around, stealing peoples ideas and their copyrighted characters for i have my own to deal with.

For people who acts like this, there's a name for it, like 'Art Thief', where one steals your art or your OC and claims it theirs.

But what do you call people who steals copyrighted OC's and claims it that it's theirs and it's written on his/her own novel?

Hmm, 'Book Thief' probably?

No no, 'Copyrighted OC Thief' should be correct.

So guys, dont go around stealing things you shouldn't it isnt good, especially to the ones who put so much effort on a certain thing.

Like how i took so much time and effort to think of something for my characters.

Well, that's about it, i dont want to face this typical problem again, despite the fact that i might have to face it again in the future. orz;;

Peace. :'Dv

P/S: Hoho~ Guess whos birthday's coming up? >lD. 3 days till countdown! >8D *shot*

WASSUP DOCS? shot

2009-08-11T21:03:00.004+08:00

Okay, yes, i'm high, no reason why actually, im just crazy like that. *shot*

And nope nothing nice to report about, and no arts currently, unless you want to take a look at my ~~procrastinating~~ W.I.P artwork that i left it in my folders for quite some time. C8 *shot*

Just wanted to ~~update my dead blog~~ type what i have in mind.

....

If i can actually remember most of them. orz;;

Anyway, bought another Kuroshitsuji puzzle, gonna rearrange it during the holidays. 8D

Hmm, what else, oh yes, i have a master plan in getting an electric guitar, not sure if it'll work though. orz;;

What other stuff do i have in mind? =A=

Oh yes, and again, i want to study in subang, i dont like it here. .___.

My friends are just so strict here. ;A;

Anddd onto college.

Yes, i might not take digital animation or illustration course, why?

Because my brother ruined my life, LOL, joking.

My brother said if i were to take digital animation, i wont be able to have a future( lolwhut ), as in, i wont earn enough money, not even enough to get a new guitar. D:

So yes, maybe i'm going for the mass communication course. And heck, i have yet to know what will this course do in my future career. D:

Mass communication's all about writing, or so i've heard. I'm not sure if it's true, gonna ask my cousin about it, since she's taking mass communication course. But if it IS all about writing, i'm doomed, because, i have zero interest in writing, i only draw, well i do write bubble talks( dialogues ) in my mangas, but IT DOESNT OCCUR WITH WRITING 1500 WORDS. ;A;

Okay, onto something else, i still have YET to think what course i have to take in the future, SPM's still on the loose. orz;;

Hmm, ahh, i still have to improve in my drawing, in case if i really want to be a comic artist, probably a part-time comic artist and a part-time musician/singer? 8D *shot*

I really want to be like YUI though. ;A;

Inspirational music strives me to go for the best...in music, not studying, LOL. *SHOT*

I'm getting used to most of YUI's fast songs, though maybe my strumming sucks, still, it sounds the same as the song, as long as the chords are the same as the rhythm, you dont have to worry 'bout strumming, though i'd love to improve on my strumming. orz;;

Singing isnt a problem either, though yes, still need to practice on high pitched parts. 8D

Hmm, what else...

Nope guess that's about it. 8D

Peace. :'Dv

P/S: Hopefully i'd be able to go out with Xyn and Cel this Saturday. orz;;. Sorry about the other day. ;A;. It was Guan Yin's birthday and i had to attend for the prayer session and my parents weren't free for the whole day. orz;;. Really sorry. ;A;

P/S/S: I need an electric guitar so bad. =A=

Wow

2009-08-07T22:00:00.003+08:00

Yeah, wow, indeed.

Took me 2 weeks to update my blog. LOL. Sorry. orz;;

Didn't had anything in mind to write. D8 *shot*

Anyway, here's a lil fanart-ish online game comic i did for fun. orz;;

Was bored and had a few ideas in my head when i played an online game with my friends. XD;;

And last Saturday, i think, went to the place where i used to have guitar lessons.( they shifted to a new building, they have 2 seperate buildings now which is not far away from each other, just a few blocks away, one for purchases and products, and the other one's for courses. I went to the products and purchases one. )

Went in the store because i begged my mom to let me take a look at the electric guitars they had in store. Checked out the so many made of awesome-sauced guitars. And i saw an Epiphone Les Paul. OAO

An Epiphone Les Paul Honey Sunburst though, i asked if they had Honey Sunburst, they say they have it but it's in the store. orz;;. AND I THOUGHT OF TAKING A GOOD LOOK AT IT BEFORE I LEAVE THE STORE. >8C.

There were other Epiphone Les Pauls, most of them didnt really caught my interest, except Black Beauty. *wiggles eyebrows* *SHOT*

Got back some of my monthly results, better than my midterms by 20%. 8D

Still there's improvement though. :'D

My History got 63%. 8D

At least im the highest amongst my friends. :'D

During mid-terms, i was the lowest among them, but HAH! IN YOUR FACE! XD

It's only objective though. OTL;;. If there's structure questions in it, i'm sure to be fried. D8 *shot*

Hmm what else...

Oh yeah, broke relations with the sounder, but got back because the sounder wanted to settle this, and my friend settled it with her. =A=

Hmm, guess there's not much to report, i had flu, sore throat, and a mile fever for 2 days since Tuesday till Wednesday, went back to school the next day after that.

Nope nothing else. XD;;

And no, i dont have that recent H1N1 vibe. XD;;

Peace. Be healthy everyone. :'Dv

Newsssaaaapaparrrrr!

2009-07-26T11:18:00.001+08:00

IT'S OUT! 8D

My art i posted since April 5th is out in the newspaper today! 8DDDDDD

Well there was another one that i submitted which is this but it wasn't posted in the newspaper, so i posted this instead. 8D

God damn it, it took them so long to actually post it. =A=

Luckily i was patient enough. 8D *shot*

It looks alot darker than the original though, even the guitar hole is missing, im not even sure if there's a guitar in the picture anymore. D8

And all of the details that i used alot of time CG-ing on the top are gone. ;A;

Here's the original piece and here's the link.

See the difference?

The original looks more shinier. *A* *shot*

And look at the details! ;A;

Well, till here. orz;;

Peace. :'Dv

Tagss?

2009-07-26T10:29:00.007+08:00

Since i'm bored and i felt like doing tags, here i go. 8D

Xyn, im not gonna do your repulsively long tag. LOL. Sorry! It's too long. ;A;

And i think it got lost somewhere in your posts. D8

Here i go. :'D

I got tagged by Miki.

Actually i got tagged by a few certain people for this tag and only this tag. LOL. *shot*

And so i'm doing it now. 8D *shot*

How do you know 1?
Since kindergarden.

What would you do if you never met 2?
It would be '1,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10' instead.

What would you do if 3 & 4 dated you?
'1,2,5,6,7,8,9,10' would feel lonely. :C

Would 5 & 6 make a good couple?
Well, after 5 comes 6, i say why not?

Do you think 10 is attractive?
8 is more attractive. D:

Do you know anything about 8's family?
They're all numerical numbers?

Tell me something about 9?
9? What about 9? D:

What languages does 2 speaks?
Numerical language.

Who is 3 going out with?
4. 3&4 are cheating on me. :C

How old is 4 ?
4? I'm not sure. D8

When was the last time you talked to 5?
Err in school during maths period? =A=

Who is 6 favorite singer ?
I would say band instead of singer. 2ne1, i kinda forgot the band name. *shot*

Would you date 7?
7? I prefer dating 8. D8

What is 9 last name ?
'ine'.

Which school does 2 go to?
2 goes to every school in the world! 2's so well known, same as for the other numbers. D8

What do you like about 3?
...Nahh, i still prefer 8. D: *shot*

Anddd done. :'D

My favourite numbers are 4 and 6 though. D:

....

.........

Since i felt so bad, might as well do Xyn's, but i'm only gonna do partially. *shot*

1. Which is your favorite color out of Red , Black, Blue , Green , or Yellow?
- Black? or Blue? *Takes both answers* No one says i cant. :D

2. Your first initial?
- R or Y? *Takes both*

3. Your month of birth?
- December.

4. Which color do you like more, black or white?
- I like both. D8

5. Name of persons of the same sex as yours .
- Xyn
- Celine
- Nee Nee
- Rika
- TOO MANY MORE TO STATE. ORZ;;

6. Your favorite number?
- 4 and 6. 8D

7. Do you like Flying or Driving more?
- Actually i like both, but i prefer flying more. 8D

8. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?
- Ocean. :'D

When you're done, scroll down . ( Don't cheat! )

Answers ::

1. If you choose:
Red - You are alert and your life is full of love .
Black - You are conservative and aggressive .
Green - Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back .
Blue - You u are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love .
Yellow - You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down .

2. If your initial is:
A-K - You have a lot of love and friendships in your life .
L-R - You try to enjoy your life to the maximum & your love life is soon to blossom .
S-Z - You like to help others and your future love life looks very good .

3. If you were born in:
Jan-Mar : The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected .
April-June : You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever .
July-Sep : You will have a great year and will experience a major life-changing experience for the good .
Oct-Dec : Your love life will not be great, but eventually you will find your soul mate .

4. If you chose:
Black : Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change .
White : You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it .

5. This persons in your best friend .

6 This is how many close friends you have in your lifetime .

7. If you chose:
Flying : You like adventure .
Driving : You are a laid back person .

8. If you chose:
Lake : You are loyal to your friends and your lover and are very reserved .
Ocean : You are spontaneous and like to please people .

9. This wishes will come true only if you tag this to five people in one hour .
Tag it to ten people, and it will come true before your next birthday !!
Look at the end of the post!

Next... :'D

1.What is your real name?
- ...... The number you have dialed, is currently not available, please try again later. *beep*

2. Do you like it?
- Well, yes and no. 8D

3. Are you single or taken?
- Taken by my friends.

4. Your current age?
- 15+. Gonna be 16 on 25th December, so long more. orz;;

5. Your current feelings right now?
- Happy and indescribable? 8D

6. What are your hobbies?
Drawing.
Guitar-ing.
Listening to Music.
Laughing.
Computer-ing.

7. Who are you currently missing the most?
My friends and YUI. :'D

8. If you are in school, the principle allows you to wish for anything, what would it be?
'Only one wish - NO RULES!!'
Exactly! XD

9. Who inspires you the most?
My family, friends and YUI. 8D

10. Do you believe in miracles?
After what i've been through. Yes plz.

11. One miracle that God showed in your life?
This. 8D

12. Favourite song?
Too many. D8
YUI's one of 'em. >8D

13. Name 3 random things that you love to do.
Guitar-ing.
Drawing.
Finding inspiration.

or

Making new Friends.
Making a person laugh.
Tries to be useful.

14. 3 random things that you dislike?
My drawing skills.
My guitar-ing skills.
My singing.

15. What are you looking forward to?
Err... i'm not sure. orz;;
Does a goal counts? D8

Nextttt. :'D

LAST PERSON WHO..
1. Slept in a bed beside you?
My hugging pillow, pillow, and blanket. I'm a loner. :C
I want to sleep with my friends. ;A;

2. You went to the mall with?
Family, to Sunway Pyramid.

3. You went to dinner with?
My family.

4. You talked to on the phone?
Xyn and Cel. 8D

5. Made you laugh?
My outstation friends. 8D

6. Hugged you?
Baww, dont make me cry. ;A; *listening to 'Do i make you proud' by Taylor Hicks from Xyn's playlist.*

No one did sadly. :'C

If you must know, i'm doing from the bottom to the top. LOL. Though only this tag. XD;;

7. Said they loved you?
So far nobody said that, but i said 'i love you' to 3 people so far, and that's good. 8D

8. Held your hand?
My mom. *shot*

9. You spoke with?
My mom and my lil brother.

10.You cried over?
Certain stuffs. :'D

Anddd done! 8D

Peace. :'Dv

Oh Great

2009-07-24T18:18:00.004+08:00

My phone got reseted due to personal issues. orz;;

Everything in my phone's gone, excluding the stuff from my memory card. orz;;

So yeah, i will need everyone's phone number. orz;;

Those who knows me in real life please contact me through my MSN or my Cbox, thanks. :'D

Anyways, today i got to have a hold on something. It gave me a tune of awesomeness.

An Electric Guitar.

I GET TO PLAY IT IN SCHOOL TODAY. 8DDD

What more, ~~abused/molested~~ touched it. ;A;

It was my seniors. 8D

I didnt approach my senior for the guitar, since i was really shy around her.

She's one of the seniors that i admire. 8D

Until my other senior took out her electric guitar when she wasn't around and played with it without her permission, so i asked it from him instead. LOL. *shot*

When she got back from somewhere she was asking money from him. LOL. In a joking way of course. 8D

I wanted to give the guitar back because i felt bad but she allowed me to play it instead. 8D

And so i ~~abused/molested~~ played with it, with some of the Jpop songs. 8D

Yes, i memorized some of the power chords from certain songs that i wanted to play with an electric guitar. 8D

It makes me want get my own electric guitar now, it's so awesome. D:

And my hands are so itchy right now, i need an electric guitar despite it being heavy. D:

Well, it wasn't really heavy, but ah well, WHO CARES. LOL.

And i got to play around with the amplifier. 8D

At least i know how it actually works now. Despite there are still some parts that i need to learn. orz;;

I still need to know how pedaling works. D8

Alot of things happened recently, some happy some sad. :'D

I lost something, with sadness all the way, couldn't really sleep comfortably like usual. D:

But it's okay, i was being misunderstanded, if that certain something doesnt like or trust me anymore, what more can i do. XD;;

Though i still loved that something.:'D

I love my 'Toys', i dont want to abandoned them nor do i want to lose their trust on me, because if i lose a 'Toy's' trust, it could affect me real deeply. :'D

I tried to make that certain 'Doll' smile, laugh, and talk to me like usual, but, i got back a...what do you call it? hmm, i dont want to call it lifeless, sounds bad. D:

An answer which kept me worried and kept me emotional in a corner? A cold answer? Is that the right way to put it?

Meh, i dont want to talk about it, makes me all emo inside. .______.

Well, sweep away all that emo-ness and onto something happy.now shall we. 8D

August is a month, where i'll be going back to Subang, most prolly. 8D

Lots of stuff is planned during the month. :'D

Going out with friends, events, as usual. 8D

Oh! I edited my original song, the first one posted from my previous post, yeah i edited the intro plucking part. 8D

And sadly, i could only seem to do YUI guitar covers instead of singing them. D8

Must've been the lyrics. TOO MANY TO MEMORIZE. LOL.

But seriously, i really want to sing the YUI's songs and play the guitar together. Hopefully i could do it during the holidays. :'D

And and the sounder didn't come for 3 days. 8D

From Tues till Thurs.

She got in an accident during Saturday, she came to school on Monday, but she looked fine. D:

She didnt came the next day. LOL.

I felt so peaceful and i was able to study properly in school. 8D

Okay, off i go, i need to bring Teddie to a vet.

He vomitted 5 times today. .______.

I pray to god that he's gonna be okay. ;A;

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Hey SMK USJ 13-nians! I might be bringing my guitar on your school's carnival day, so prepare! XD;;

Finally

2009-07-20T01:07:00.013+08:00

Ignore all background sounds if you can actually hear them!

Terribly sorry for the fuzzy sounds. orz;;

Finally! I could post videos in my blog(D8). There seems to be a problem the last time i tried uploading a video. D:

I'm not gonna sing for you guys. MWAHAHAHA- *shot*

Here you go,my first original song. 8D

Created it 2 days ago. 8D

Yeah i kinda lagged at some parts, and i couldnt change some parts of the chords fast. orz;;

Need to fix some parts later on. orz;;

Here's another one of my original songs, i wasn't planning on playing this nor did i have any intentions to make lyrics for it, but ah well. :'D

Since Cel told me to turn this into a song, might as well try. 8D

Kinda lagged at some parts. orz;; Terribly sorry. ;A;

So what do you guys think? 8D

After hearing both songs, what kind of feeling did it gave you? 8D

Please comment. orz;;

Really need to fix some parts up. ;A;

Might post some of my singing videos in the future. In the very very FAR future. :'D

Because my voice, it's embarassing .________. Peace. 8Dv

P/S: PLEASE COMMENT ON THE VIDEOS. ;A;

P/S/S: I need to make those lyrics fast, because im kinda getting bored of those songs i made being lyricless. D8

P/S/S/S: Once again, thanks to YUI for being my inspiration and motivation. 8D

Played by ear

2009-07-18T22:43:00.007+08:00

Today seemed to be a fine day, despite i have to type another post. orz;;

But still what's the past stay as the past. :'D

Here's something to enlighten you guys up. XD;;

Something happened to me today and it was so darn funny.

Firstly, while i was on the way home from my dental appointment today, in the car, i was thirsty and i wanted to drink some water.

So i took the bottle of water in the car, and TRIED drinking the water.

Why tried?

Okay, so while i was drinking the water, my brother started laughing. And if he laughs, i laugh too. orz;;

So from time to time i have to stop drinking for a while or i'll spit.

He kept on doing it till my mom was frustrated and asked me to drink it at home.

I showed my mom the 'XP' face while the water was still in my mouth.

And then my brother thought that expression was funny so he laughed.

I couldnt take it anymore, so i went PFFFTTTTTTTTTTT in the car, and my brother laughed even harder. Half of my pants was wet. And that was the first time that i spitted a mouth full of water. .______.

Stupid evil big bro. .___.

Okay, that was hilarious, for me. LOL.

I kinda played a few songs by ear today. 8D

Sam Hui's 'Hok San Go' and that other song with the lyrics ' I wonder how, I wonder why.' or something like that, i dont know the title of the song, i think it's 'Lemon Tree'? orz;;

But I only know a part of it. orz;;

And i created my own original song! 8D

I need someone to help me out with the lyrics. ._____.

I cant seem to think when it comes to lyrics. orz;;

As long as i can get the lyrics, then i can come up with titles. :'D

My mom told me that i might be performing during Chinese New Year in front of my relatives. o___________________o

I'm not sure if it's good or bad. D8

Okay, i dont think there's anything to report since i already bombed you guys with the previous post. orz;;

Currently having a nice and friendly talk with Nee. :'D

Peace. 8Dv

Untitled

2009-07-17T23:03:00.010+08:00

Yeah there's no title, because there'll be random stuffs in here, lolz. XD;;

This might be one of my long posts, LOL. Maybe longer who knows. XD;;

Be open when you guys read, i do not plan to cause any misunderstandings nor am i trying to be offensive to anyone who reads on. :'D

Because this is my own view of what i'm about to write, and i write only facts.

Recently, a little war started with misunderstandings and stubborness between my friends, it kinda caused dissapointment on me.

Both parties are wrong i suppose, one just assume stuffs too much, another one was just stubborn. Read on and see who's wrong. 8D

Well, i cant blame them, it's their characteristics anyway( no offence! XD ). XD;;

To the one who assumes too much,

Well, i cant say much about you, huh. Of course you've been my best friend for 7 years(?). But there are pros and cons about you. Don't misunderstand! And dont get offended! I just needed to voice out a lil' about you, that's all, no harm done. :'D

The cons about you.

First off, well, you've been assuming about things too much lately and i cant blame you, it's your nature maybe, try and fix this. XD;;

Dont blame the other party that he's/she's being arrogant, you are too.

Dont blame the other party that he's/she's stubborn, because you're just the same.

Secondly, you spread secrets even if you were told not to spread about it, not all but some maybe, i dont study in your school nor in the same class with you like i used to anymore, so i'm not sure about that. XD;;

You weren't considerate in some point, what were you inconsiderate about, do some brainstorming about it, it aint hard. XD;;

You dont really care about people around you excluding Rika.

Next, you're rude sometimes, please take note, well maybe not rude in front of me( sometimes ) nor Rika, but still, who were you rude to, you should know. XD;;

Saying that it's not your fault in this matter and stuff and you do not want or plan to settle it, it sounds more like you're running away from reality by giving excuses that you made plans.

You lied to me, when you said you've gone to sleep and pretended to be your brother and acted like him by asking me unlogical questions that the answers were already there!

You lied when you told the both of us that you'll settle this matter some other time, despite the fact you just ran off going tuition. You never did want to settle this just after we had the conversation.

Lastly, you werent loyal much, to Rika yes, i truly understand, but what about the other party? Were you treating the other party the same way as you treat Rika?

You are unmatured to face and admit most of the problems, you acted like a child.

You gave alot of excuses, a tonnes of them, despite they were actually facts, but i still dislike the way you gave just a lil too much of excuses.

You change some certain topics in an instant. When we're talking about 'A' and in an instant you'll be talking about 'B'.

I got rather dissapointed for the fact that you gave up on being friends with the other party.

There are still Cons about you, but i shall not type it, ask the people around you, what do they think about your recent character, this time try asking a different person rather than asking the same old people you told me, who knows you might end up having a different answer. C;

Something to enlighten you up with some pros about you. :'D

First off, you're a great friend, despite the fights we've went through. :'D

You asked for advices from me sometimes, thank you, because i like it when people asks me for advices sometimes despite the fact i suck at helping, but i'm still a good listener. :'D

You listen to my advices and you apologized, i thank you for that and im very proud of you for doing so. :'D

But you didnt stay strong just a lil longer and waited for the results, instead you jumped onto conclusions( this is a con. *shot* ). XD;;

You're a strong fighter, you still had passion in something even if you were forbidden to go for it, it's not very good, but i still support you and i'm proud of you at the same time, keep doing what you like( not the Cons ), dont get stomped down, just dont overdo it. :'D

You took care of Rika for me when i'm not around, i'm happy and i thank you. :'D

You're a supportive friend, you supported me in what i wanted to do, and you were one of the friends who ~~forced~~ got me into Cosplay for the first time. :'D

You cared for me the other time when i was about to die from that allergy, despite the fact you did not call me, but i had to call you and tell you about it instead. XD;;

Overall, you're just as a great friend for being with me for almost 7 years, you're just unique in your own way, keep the pros, not the cons. :'D

Just keep in mind, i have no intentions of harming you nor cause misunderstandings. XD

Now, to the one who's just stubborn. :'D

We've been friends before during primary, we became friends during DayCare was it? When we were only 7 years old. XD;;

Except we never really talked to each other much during primary like what we're doing now. :'D

Your Cons?

Lol, i'm gonna describe your Cons in a funny way, because your cons are just funny, LOL.

You're stubborn, yes you are, LOL. And yes, i know you know you're stubborn, it your nature now amiright? XD;;

You dont show mercy in certain things, terrifying yes, LOL.

You tease people in a way that people could sometimes get it wrong, and could get end up getting hurt, for example like myself *shot*. LOL.

You're a bully sometimes, i still remember the time you gave me some awful nicknames during primary and i end up crying in class. :C

You're an unforgiving person sometimes( a sign of stubborness *sigh ).

You're unsatisfied with the other party's apology, but i can understand that, despite the fact that the other party used a piece of paper and wrote a really small apology on the corner.

Not an appropriate apology i see. XD;;

But about the second apology, the other party said sorry to you, but you gave a lifeless answer, i can understand that too, it's not easy to face a sudden apology. XD;;

So be prepared in life, you'll never know what obstacles will be coming towards you. :'D

Hmm, what cons do you have exactly? Since we started being real friends during 13, i cant really think of much cons about you. D:

Onto the pros then. :'D

You're a kind person, you helped people out and you comforted them when they're in despair. :'D

You prank people, but it's a good thing, people need laughs in their life to enlighten themselves up, but just dont overdo it by scaring people with that scary ghost thingy(._.). :'D

You supported me and helped me out between which career i'm supposed to do in the future. :'D

You're a great writer, and you made a touching poem in your recent post, i love it. ;A;

You're straightforward, but it's a good thing depends on the situation, you're not afraid to voice out the whole truth to make things really clear for people to understand.

I still dont get why the other party is just being stubborn and closing his/her ears with both her hands with this current matter when this party is trying to make things clear and trying to get this thing settled.

A big teddy bear you are. :'D *shot*

I got teased alot by you but it wasn't hurtful though, it gave me this 'good' feeling but i'm not sure how to describe it. orz;;

You listen to my advices sometimes, i thank you for that. :'D

Overall, despite that we've only been true friends for just only 4 years, i can say you're a great friend too, you helped me through some obstacles sometimes. :'D

Okay.

Pros and Cons are over.

Both of you had been great friends, really good indeed that words are unable to describe it.

Just keep in mind, that i love you guys. :'D

And to the one who assumes just too much, for the last time, dont assume, and this is what i think for your current character. Maybe some other people you asked couldn't see the real you nor would they want to hurt your heart, but, this is what i think of you. :'D

I didnt want to hurt you, so i did not say a word for the things you've done wrong, and i thought you would gradually realize what you've been doing, but maybe i was wrong. So i wrote pros and cons about you, giving you hints about what you've recently done wrong.

If i was the other party i would feel the same thing as you wrote a small apology on a piece of paper. Apologies need to be spoken sometimes, it'll be the only way to see how the other party reacts. And then, wait for their forgiveness, but you were impatient, you couldn't wait so you said you were tired of this and assume everything again.

You're not facing and settling this problem like an adult, you're running away from the problem like a coward. And giving excuses, 'Oh there's dinner tonight so i cant settle this.' or 'Oh im going out with my mom to shop tomorrow.'.

These are all just the same lame excuses that you always give. There's always something going on when we ask you out.

Realize your mistake, dont give me excuses like, ' Why dont you ask the other party? I cant remember everything all by myself now can i? I have many things to remember you know.'

That is just BS. Totally bull. What things are you to remember that was so important when you cant even remember something as simple as this, well maybe not that simple, but still, it isn't hard to remember. You dont even plan to remember what you've done wrong, it gave a great impact to the other party. Maybe you dont even realize it. And you need people to point out what were your mistakes.

What things was it that was so important that you couldn't even remember something as simple as this? Bishies? Anime? Cosplay costumes? Are all this alot more important than friendship?

And what was 'I do not want to ruin our friendship.'?

You dont want to ruin ours? What about the both of you? I'm helping you to settle this, and you tried to run away from it again. By saying that was your last line before you sleep, despite the fact that was an entire lie.

You decide yourself, whether you've done wrong or not.

I do not care if you want to remember what mistakes you've done. Because i'll end up having that same lame excuses you always give.

And once again, i'm not harming you, this is the truth. I do not want any misunderstandings, if there's anything you misunderstand, ask me, DONT assume.

And to the one who's just so stubborn, yes, you've been quite unforgiving, but it's understandable. And yes you've been complaining quite alot. But all those were understandable. You had your reasons so everything was understandable, you made the story clear enough for me to understand. So i have nothing to say about you in the current situation.

To the one who assumes too much, I'm not playing the 'fair game'. Because the other party told me the whole story clearly that was enough to make me understand. But you couldn't even tell me what was really going on. You told me fragments by fragments, but the other party gave me a whole cake!

You told other people who werent related to this matter the same thing! Fragments! But why not a whole? Why couldnt you have told them the whole thing? Because you did not want to admit you were wrong. I admit, you did admit that you were wrong, but that was only a single admit for all of the things you've done wrong. What about the rest? You're leaving them behind? Having people wounded in their hearts?

I'm saying this for your own good, i do not want to have my friends going on another world war, not talking to each other and stuff.

And on the phone when i called you to settle the matter, you talked in a tone that i seriously got pissed. You acted as if nothing happened. And you said it with a happy tone with a seriously childish voice.

'No, i do not want to settle the matter with the other party anymore.'

In a SERIOUSLY childish voice. I thought when i called you, you would give an voice i was expecting, but you gave me a SERIOUSLY childish voice. It got me real pissed when you said it with a happy tone and acted like NOTHING has ever happened.

If you must know, you had wounded me as well, with so much of dissapointment.

Lol, even after all this rambling, when we're gonna meet in real life, i'm still gonna say hi, and act like the usual me. Because it's my nature, i dont plan on ruining one's day with my sorrowness and despair.

Im not gonna be arrogant here, but, I grew out to be a caring and understanding character rather than my old arrogant self. Then what about you? What have you grown out?

Think about it.

And remember, I Love You Guys.

I love you guys so much. I want to have fun and being able to laugh with you guys together. I want to hear both of your laughters. I want those memories back. The really good ones.

It might be cheesy, but it's the truth.

"Get that in your thick skull."

"Good luck with that girl."

" What do you think of her?"

"How come someone who doesn't like Anime come and ruin my plan?"

"It's like I'm talking to a lifeless person."

"Well, too bad then."

"Thanks a lot."

"What more 'she' want from me?"

*Does ugh face behind my back.*

"I went with the wrong person."

All those things you said,
after hearing them,
I can't believe my own ears.

And the pain,
in my heart,
every word felt like a stab,
over and over again.

This is what I get,
for all these years of friendship.

I guess they don't mean
anything to you,
for a day's misunderstanding,
is traded for years of friendship.

You're constantly hurting
people around you,
not only me,
but many more.

But we don't say,
because we care,
care for your heart.

I call you my friend,
but deep down inside,
you already held an important place,
which existed once.

Reader, if you still think
I'm wrong,
go ahead and say,
for I don't care anymore.

But I have one last thing to say,
I'll always remember the times we had,
fun and laughter,
maybe you might remember,
maybe you don't.

Who am I to judge you,
I don't know,
cause' I don't know,
who am I to you.

A touching poem. Made by the stubborn one.

Do you really want to end this? To the one who just assumes too much.

Think twice. And think hard before making a decision.

Peace.

Bored again. :'D

2009-07-13T22:52:00.004+08:00

Yush, just needed to report on a few things. ;D

Daicon was great! 8D

Went with Rika and SN. 8D

Met Maru my band partner and Taka with 2 of his band members, bought a 'few' stuffies, anddd i saw Chihara Minori. :'D

Met numbryk from deviantART.

Err, what else? =A=

Oh yeah I kinda refrain myself from buying figurines even though there were AMOUNTS of them i wanted. ;_____;

Nevermind, i'm still grasping my hands for my dear Saber Lily figurine. >8D

Saber Lily my dear, come to me~~ ;A; *shot*

Hmm what else am i suppose to report? ( Has only 30 minutes. orz;; )

Oh yeah, something great happened in school today. 8D

My Science teacher made one of my friend furious.

Wanna know why? Ask me through my face. Mwahahaha- *shot*

Peace. lDv

Oh goodness

2009-07-10T21:44:00.003+08:00

FINALLEH. OTL;;

After being banned by my dad due to my results for the week, i could finally use the comp. =A=

And my hand kinda hurts now due to guitar abusing. orz;;

I think it died, somehow. D8

I tried some of YUI's songs in the book.

And i kinda got some of the chords right. 8D

Problem is singing. orz;;

I think i played 5 of her songs with the guitar already but im able to sing at least 1 or 2? I'm not sure myself. orz;;

Currently praying to god that i could go Daicon for both days tomorrow and on Sunday. orz;;

School was alot fun today, we get to crossdress the guys during Sivik period. 8D

I'll post pictures hopefully next week. XD;;

Because all of those pictures are with my friends. 8D

And one of the guys in our class, seriously looked like a girl when we put cosmetics on him. o_________o

I had doubts he was a guy. LOL

So our sivik teacher kinda brought us to 2 classes.

... It was enough to make the whole school roar. LOL

The other side of the school's block could see all 5 guys being crossdressed.

And seriously alot were whistling to the one that seriously looked like a girl. D8

He told the teacher it was his second time doing this, his first time was in his scout's camp.

it was loads of laughs, but it was worth it.

The guy who got maked up and looked like a girl( i mean seriously he looked like my elder cousin, LOL ), he was really sporting, and he kept waving to people from the other block in a girly way and in the classes we enter. We called him our 'Ultima weapon'. LOL.

Because he seriously looked like a girl( i dont know how many times i've said that. orz;; ).

Typing is of no use, i need pictures to prove it, LOL.

Baww, guess there's nothing left to type about today. OTL;;

Oh well, need to pray, i seriously want to go to Daicon tomorrow and the day after. =A=

Peace. 8Dv

Kinokuniya is Loved

2009-07-05T23:29:00.009+08:00

Just after i finished posting today's first post, i went out to KLCC, for some HomeDEC stuff in the convention centre.

Everything inside there is as boring as hell. D:

Walked for 2 hours, nothing much to see except interior and exterior stuff.

Just after that my legs were so darn tired, meh it's normal, when i'm at a place i dont like, my feet gets all tired. XD;; *shot*

So went to Kinokuniya after that, and i was in heaven after that, LOL.

I quickly ran to the Japanese area and started searching at the Music section, because the last time i went to that place, they had YUI's songs score book.

There weren't much guitar books, as expected, and i saw YUI's 'My Short Stories' album bandscore book. I didnt buy it because i'm sure Paper Plane doesnt want to do any covers that's related to YUI, and there weren't any songs i knew from that album.

So i got tired of searching that section, and went to the Graphic books section. There were 4 shelves of it, all related to anime and stuff.

And god, i found something that seriously caught my eye.

Persona 4 Official Design Works.

There were 2 books of it, so i took one, and now there's only one left at the shelf.

Hmm, i wonder who would be the lucky one to stumble upon that last book. :'D

There was another P4 book i grabbed my hands on but i let it go. orz;;

Because it might be a guide book or something, and i might end up regretting buying that book, LOL.

Actually, i could've buy that book on the spot, but because im saving money for an Epiphone Les Paul, i let it go. orz;;

It's ok, i'm going to go back there some other time and hunt for it again. :'D

Hopefully it's still there by the time i go back there again though, LOL. orz;;

So since i was bored, i went to the Music section and start my search again, no luck, or maybe i was too lazy to browse.

I browse through the whole Japanese area, and then i went back to the Music section again.

With just a single glance, i caught it.

YUI's all songs score book.

But all of the song scores was printed 'till YUI's 'I Loved Yesterday' album.

Which is good. 8D

Because they clearly had almost everything i wanted inside, even that hard to find 'Happy Birthday to you you' by YUI chords that couldn't be google-able. 8D

So i was holding onto my 2 new babies. :'D

And my mom paid for the YUI book instead of the P4 book, and i have to pay her back the amount of money that's equal to the P4 book i bought. orz;;

Because the P4 book is useless to my mom, while the YUI book, there's at least playable chords in it, so she understands that.

And here some pics i took. 8D

I just wanted to pose the books with my guitar, LOL. *shot*

Yush, i need to brush up my photography skills, LOL.

Bwahahaha, gonna try to play all of YUI's songs in the book. 8D

But first, i need to listen to most of her songs that's in the book, LOL, i'll be needing it. orz;;

My dad's gonna lock up my mouse and keyboard again this time due to results. orz;;

No worries, i have something 'special' with me. lD

That's about it for today. 8D

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Hey Nee, you want to get your hands on that P4 book now dont you? lD

P/S/S: I've bought a new webcam, MWAHAHAHA- *shot*

Damned Streamyx. D:

2009-07-05T11:37:00.002+08:00

Stupid friggin streamyx. D:

You're so damn lucky i couldnt change my ICP to W1max. D:

I couldn't use the internet for the whole friggin day yesterday. D:

It happened today too, but my smart brain solved the case. :D *shot*

I could sing and play 'I remember you' by YUI now. 8D *shot*

Problem is i couldn't really remember the lyrics and the chords. orz;;

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Stupid friggin streamyx, i'm so not gonna subscribe to you in the future. D:

Drums

2009-07-03T21:38:00.002+08:00

Well, i took a picture of my senior playing the drums, and this is how my school drums looks like. 8D

My senior's on the left playing the red drums. 8D

He and another friend of mine teaches me how to play the drums. 8D

And yes, i learned real quick with the drums. *shot*

I could play a drum cover now too! 8D

'Behind These Hazel Eyes' by Kelly Clarkson. 8D

There's nothing much to report today, just wanted to show you guys my school drums. 8D

Peace. 8Dv

My motivation

2009-07-02T23:29:00.011+08:00

I took my guitar out for a maintenance trip today! 8D

It needed new strings because the 4th string seems to be coming out. D:

It's been since Nov' 08 and all 4th, 5th and 6th strings from the guitar seems to be rusting off. XD;;

And it's been long since i've entered the guitar shop where i bought my guitar. :'D

So i was excited. 8D

Yeah, when i entered the store, i saw Gibson Les Pauls. o___________________o

And since i saw a Gibson Les Paul, i'm definitely sure there were Epiphone Les Pauls. D8

I took a stroll around the store, and since the store's quite small, so there weren't many expected guitars to be there.

I wasn't expecting Gibson Les Pauls to be there though, since the store's small and all. o__o

And amazingly, i saw Epiphone guitars. D8

There was a Flying V electric guitar if i wasn't mistaken, and i couldnt have a better look at the Epiphone Les Pauls, because they were in a glass case behind the counter and the body of the guitar wasn't facing front. orz;;

Sadly, they didn't have the design i wanted. orz;;

Better luck next time i'd say. :'D

Hmm, i wonder if they take orders. :'D

Just recently after singing 'Goodbye Days' by YUI, i had the urge of singing more of her songs, and i've been really into her songs than usual. o___o

It's a good sign anyway, YUI's songs are seriously great. :'D

I found a few great YUI songs which caught my interest and i found the chords, but i have problem playing the chords because one of the chords is a serious hand stretcher and i will be having a hard time pressing most of the chords on time. D8

Well, as they always say, practice makes it perfect. :'D

Before i sang to my real life friends, my net friends was the one who heard me singing first. 8D

Though of course, i wasn't very good at that time, and was super shy. XD;;

Thanks to my net friends i started opening up by singing to the people that's close around me. 8D

My net friends kinda motivated me to start singing openly. 8D

I sang 'You and Me' by Lifehouse to my net friends, and that was my very first song that i could sing and play together. 8D

And yes of course, it was really crappy, though my net friends kept saying it wasnt, i still had to deny it and say it was crappy. XD;;

After that i got bored and wanted to play and sing another song, 'Tears in Heaven' by Eric Clapton was my next choice.

Why that song?

Well, my elders loved this song( i think LOL *shot* ), and i loved it too, so i thought why not? Since i know my elders doesnt want to hear me play and sing modern songs when they'll be asking me to sing and play for them. XD;;

And this song's all about plucking the strings. 8D

I learned how to pluck from looking through books that has solo tablatures in it.

I couldn't wait for my teacher so yeah, i started learning to pluck myself. 8D

And that's when i started to love Freestyling, LOL. XD;;

Actually i didnt even know what Freestyling is, i just took whatever guitar book they have in Popular bookstores, bought it and brought it back home, flipped a page, started pressing the strings and plucked them! XD;;

And Taka said to me that i should be able to play Power chords since i knew how to pluck already, LOL.

Power chords could only be used for electric guitars to give off that rockish feeling, i think, LOL.

But i've seen people using Power chords for classical and acoustic guitars, so bleh. XD;;

So as time passes by, you'd get bored with just 2 songs, amiright? >8D

This is where 'Goodbye Days' by YUI jumped in the bandwagon. 8D

And yes 'Goodbye Days' is the first Japanese song i sang. 8D

I was glad that i chose the right song. 8D

The chords of the song was hard at first and i had problems singing and i didn't quite strum it on the right time, but later on, it was quite quite easy to catch up with the song after alot of practice. 8D

I still remember my uncle once said or asked.

'Why is a girl playing a guy's thing?'

Well, who said that playing the guitar was only a guy's thing?

I say not. >8D

Why? Well, guys, it's the 21st century, there's policewomen in the U.S, and there are women who joined the army force.

So why not? 8D

Not long ago, my uncle asked my mom how well was i doing with the guitar and asked if i could sing.

My mom said i was doing well with the guitar, and she wasn't sure if i could sing and play, well of course, i dont think i have sung a song for her yet that time.

And my uncle said,

'Invite her over and sing for us some time.'

Us referring to my more-than 5 uncles and aunties.

Just imagine me shaking, LOL.

Bleh, i have to sing to them sooner or later anyway. XD;;

So yeah, who started all this?

A friend of mine from the net who came and asked me to sing for her and my other net friends. 8D

Who was my motivation?

My net friends and my real life friends. 8D

... and someone i hate, LOL. *shot*

That's about it for today. :'D

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: I hate you.

P/S/S: Does anyone know 'More Than Words' by Extreme? Yeah i might be getting the chords from my friend tomorrow in school. :'D

P/S/S/S: Playing the drums again in school tomorrow. :'D

Bored at 12 in the morning

2009-06-29T00:18:00.023+08:00

Yush, currently typing this during 12 in the morning when i have to wake up for school in 5 hours, LOL.

Yush i know, what am i doing, i should be sleeping, LOL. *shot*

I'll just type what happened today( yesterday ), since i'm still awake, and yes, when im still awake, i'll always take yesterday as today, if you get what i mean that is, LOL. XD;; *shot*

Ermm, Woke up early first thing in the morning, went to the computer, wanted to try out some new songs with the guitar as for the old songs seems to be quite a bore to me already.

This time, i tried something Japanese, 'Goodbye Days' by YUI( YUI's my idol. *A* ). 8D

Because i was playing and singing English songs the whole time, might as well try something new.

God damn it, I love YUI so much. ;A;

So, after printing out the chords, i started practicing 'till noon, it was kinda hard to practice at first because i was having a hard time trying to pronounce the Japanese pronounciation right and since it was my first time playing and singing with a Jap song.

After practicing 'till somewhere in between in the afternoon and in the evening, I got the singing right! I was still sucky with the guitar part though, i couldn't press the strings hard enough/on time.

Anddd just around 6 something or less, i called Cel, and i sang the song for her, she said it was nice, but after that she had something to do later on so i told her i'd sing for her again later again at night.

At night, i called her, and i started singing to her again, she said it wasn't bad and i have a cute voice( WHAT. D8 ), and she told me to just practice more on my singing, especially my pitching. 8D

We chatted a 'lil while, and then it was time to call Xyn.

So i called Xyn, sang it to her, and she said,

'Pfft!( Laughs ) I cant believe you've got such a GIRLY voice.'

Well of course, because i was singing a GIRL's song, LOL.

And yes, if you know me in real life, i have this voice where it's in between the borderline of a boy and a girl's voice.

Xyn said i have to sing and play for her LIVE, LOL, due to her phone's speaker problem and all, she said my voice came out weird in her phone, LOL. orz;;

But Xyn still gave the same comment as Cel on the phone anyway. Not bad, practice more on singing Xyn said. :'D

'You and Me' by Lifehouse and 'Tears in Heaven' by Eric Clapton are MANLY songs, VERY MANLY. >8C

Especially 'You and Me', LOL, Cel could only listen to me playing the guitar and not my singing just after singing to her 'Goodbye Days' and 'Tears in Heaven', LOL. orz;;

Because for the song 'You and Me', my voice has to go low, or it wont sound MANLY enough and it would ruin the MANLY song. *shot*

Whoa look at the amounts of MANLY, LOL. *shot*

And oh, while i was singing 'Goodbye Days' to my friends in my room, everyone from the outside of my room heard me singing which would be my siblings and my cousins. .__________.;;

And my elder cousin entered in my room while i was talking with Cel on the phone again, and we chatted on the phone for, not more than 10 mins just after i called Xyn. ;A;

Anddd i was asked by my cousin, to sing 'Goodbye Days' to my cousin ALONE in the room, so i told Cel that i'd call her again later because my cousin wants me to sing and play the guitar for her. orz;;

While i was singing the chorus just after i finished the first verse, my cousin gave a thumbs up. Just after i finish singing, my cousin tells me that i'm not bad, just that i kept pausing when i was about to sing the second verse.

.... I WAS NERVOUSSSS, WHAT DO YOU EXPECT, AND I WAS SINGING TO A RELATIVE FOR THE FIRST TIMEEEE. ;A; *dies*

Actually, after i started learning the guitar, YUI became my idol just after that, because i loved her songs and her guitar playing, although they didnt really show her guitar playing much in MV's. 8D

My motivation of singing and playing the song 'Goodbye Days' by YUI, is thanks to my advisor, Taka. 8D

Because he was playing that song in the 'Animangaki' event, and was singing like only 2 seconds of the front verse, because of that, i actually remembered that i used to actually love that song and i thought of trying that song out since i know how to play the guitar and sing with my seriously un-MANLY (>8C) and sucky voice. 8D

So what happened today, it's thanks to Taka because he reminded me how awesome YUI's songs and voice was. :'D

Like my friend said, her voice is pretty, and i just think she's amazing, like seriously. 8D

All i can say is, if i dont work out in the band, i might as well aim to become the next YUI or maybe a female version of Kotaro Oshio( *shot* ). 8D

It's a big aim, but hey, it's not impossible. :'D

Kotaro Oshio's a very VERY famous Fingerstylist if you must know. :'D

... *looks at the time*

HO SHI-, 4 MORE HOURS TO SCHOOL. D8>

THAT'S ABOUT IT FOR TODAY. :'D;;

Peace. :Dv

P/S: You're going down. Give me a 'lil bit more time, and i can prove to be alot better than you. Just you wait. I hate you.

P/S/S: I want Taka's awesome guitar playing hands. D:

P/S/S/S: I'm gonna go look for 'Happy Birthday to You You' chords by YUI, so i can sing and play it for a friend's birthday next time. 8D

Animangaki!

2009-06-27T22:32:00.005+08:00

Gonna post alot about it today, or maybe not. XD;;

WELL, woke up in the morning, noticed it's 9.30, went out of my room, my parents nor my brother weren't at home.

My brother has to go for college, and it starts at 10 a.m.

So, i woke up, noticing my parents and brother wasn't there, first thing that came to mind,

'Crap, they left to Subang without me. D:'

I quickly picked up the phone, and called my mom.

And then... Ok, im gonna summarize it for you.

There was alot of shouting and crying. LOL.

I was desperate, i needed transport.

THANK GOD, my cousin helped me. ;A;

So, ok reached Pyramid at 10.30, waited for my friends.

And guess what? The one who isn't able to go, is the first one who arrived there among my friends, LOL.

Yeah, bla bla bla, today's seriously boring. orz;;

While in the event something caught my eye, Wacom.

I asked the guy if i could 'try' drawing with it.

So i gave it a go.

ANDDDDD i drawed and CG-ed, yes i CG-ed too. *shot*

So approximately everything took me 45 minutes, i think, and here's the result! 8D

Actually, while i was drawing, the guy who was supposed to be drawing said,

'Hey, you do know that you cant save it after you're done right?'

'Yeah, i know, that's why i'm taking a picture with a camera once i'm done with it.'

'Ahhh, ok.'

.....LOL;;

The guy must be annoyed, since i was using it for so long. orz;;

That's why the picture looks rushed, and i kinda forget to shade Ciel's headdress or something. orz;;

And i'm terribly sorry if i ruined Ciel. orz;;

I was rushing that's why it doesnt really look like that cute Ciel you guys might know. ;A; *shot*

I'LL DRAW A BETTER ONE FOR YOU GUYS NEXT TIME. ;A; *dies*

OH! AND AND I SAW MY ADVISOR, TAKA! 8D

He teached me a few stuff that's needed for the guitar that i asked him about. 8D

Overall, i can say he's a really nice and funny guy in real life. 8D

So nothing much to say about today. XD;;

Just a really boring and dull day. :'D

Oh and i played DDR, i 'pwned' my friends. *shot*

What? I'm only good with keyboard DDR. D:

I'm no good with dance maps, it's a no-no for me, LOL.

Ok, both my legs died, due to over-walking. *shot*

Anddd time for a shower. :'D *shot*

Peace. :'Dv

P/S: If you're wondering if i still hate you, yes i still do. But i hate you even more now.

Pepa Puren!

2009-06-26T12:30:00.007+08:00

Bwahaha, i'm currently not in school. :'D *shot*

Why? Because they're having this running event in school, so i ditched school, cool huh? *shot*

Anyway, on with the topic.

Pepa Puren!

Yeah in romaji, it's Pepa Puren.

Our original name's Paper Plane.

And yeahhh, the logo still needs to be coloured by me. orz;;

Our band's theme, has something to do with something like Japan's High Schools.

So that's why, the logo looks alot like a school badge. XD;;

Anddd i got stuck with naming the band, so i asked one of the members to randomly create a name for us. :'D

If i remembered correctly, the leader kinda disagreed with the name 'Paper Plane' at first, LOL.

So i had to force her to agree, because it really suits the theme of the band and i find the name really good. *shot*

Why Paper Plane?

Because when we're in school, most of us made paper planes in school and throw them in class or even after school now didnt we? :'D

This is what we( okay, maybe not 'we', LOL. *shot* ) wanted, something close to what we're doing in school, doesnt matter kindergarden, elementary, junior high or high. XD;;

So there you have it, Paper Plane. :'D

Currently we have 5 members in the band. We're currently missing a drummer. D:

I wish i was the drummer, but nooooo, im stuck with the lead guitarist. .______.

The leader switched my place to rhythm guitarist, lol.

But it was for the best anyway. XD;;

Because i still sucked. orz;;

At least she said until im good and ready to go with the guitar, im back to being the lead. XD;;

So i have been lectured by my advisor( my leader's 'father' ) last night, he gave me a few tasks if i really want to work on perfecting the guitar.

I tried it with the classical guitar, but it doesnt sound right. D:

Baww, i just wished i have an electric guitar now. .________.

If i really cant get an electric guitar on time, it's best if i just quit the band. XD;;

So anyway, besides being the lead/rhythm guitarist, i'm also the advisor, or the 2nd person who's in charge of the band. *shot*

The leader said if im able to get an electric guitar this year, hopefully that we'll be able to perform this year. Wth. D:

Andd the leader said im not allowed to sing until i actually perfected the guitar. D:

Like i said it's for the best anyway. orz;; *endures*

About the leader's 'father' who is also my advisor, he's a really nice guy. :'D

He really did help alot. 8D

What most his band's gonna be recording songs in Taiwan, cool no? :'D

And about the leader, she's a great person. She knows how to put us in a gig to perform, and she sometimes sponsor stuff for us. :'D

And not to mention she's seriously perverted like my advisor, but not as serious as my advisor, LOL.

I like to call her 'bisexual beast' when she says something abnormal, LOL.

I'm even asked by the leader to stop her when the leader goes really perverted and insane, LOL.

I'll prolly describe most of the members later, or maybe until we get a drummist. XD

Oh, another thing, there's something that really made me want to quit the band, almost about 80%(?), but i'm not gonna say it. :'D

Ok, that's prolly about it for today. XD;;

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Do NOT push your luck, i still hate you, you just dont know how much.

P/S/S: Another thing, after i finished classical, im going for fingerstyling, in case if i didnt work out in the band. :'D

Hero Jaejoong hmm?

2009-06-25T13:47:00.007+08:00

Well, am bored, needed to blog, and sorry for lame title, the title's got something to do with today's post anyway. XD;;

Today, school's as usual, except i had this weird feeling, i suddenly wanted to tie my hair, i repeat, tie. *shot*

To my friends who knew me in real life, wasn't expecting this no? *shot*

My hair's super short, not even to my shoulders YET.

So i just tried tying my hair, failed miserably. <8'C

Because my hair's too short. D:

My friend said i look alot like Hero Jaejoong if i actually tied my hair. :'D

I haven't tied my hair in ages. D8

The last time i tied was in... kindergarden? *shot*

I've always hated tying my hair, my mom told me when i was young i always seemed to take off that band i used to tie my hair, LOL. XD;;

But nahh, i dont look like Hero Jaejoong at all, i just look real chubby, LOL. XD;;

Hero has serious big eyes, thanks to surgery, he used to have really small eyes and his jaw's quite fat(?) before he was in Tohoshinki. XD;;

Cel must be in shock now, LOL. Didn't know about that did you? :'D

Ok, guess there's nothing much to talk about today. :'D

I'll talk about the band tomorrow or maybe later tonight. 8D *shot*

Peace. :'Dv

P/S: I still hate you.

Checkers and Sticks

2009-06-24T22:21:00.004+08:00

Yeap, if you're wondering what does the title actually means, it's the checkered theme i took from Rai, except, it's Mizuki's turn.

Well, I cant make the checkered theme look obvious, but oh well, as long as there's something related to checkers in it. :'D

Like i said, the sketch's better, but there are errors in the sketch anyway so, bleah. XD

I still need to sketch Sakura though. :'D

Yush yush, i know i know, it's plain. REALLY plain. I just wish i have a seriously creative mind to actually create something out of the background. D:

If you noticed, i love having my characters wearing something related to hats.

Like my brother asked me the other day,

'Why do you always have your characters wearing hats?'

Well, i've answered your question. :'D

Yush, i seem to have degraded in drawing girls lately. D:

I'm terribly sorry for the recent emo posts. Terribly sorry. :'D

Will post alot of things tomorrow. Especially the about the band. Prolly. :'D

Peace. :Dv

P/S: Wow 3 emo posts in a row. And 2 of the posts is actually aimed on a certain someone. Hmm. Cool.

P/S/S: Will put up her character sheet in my OC blog around this week, so check it out when you're free. :'D

Feelings

2009-06-24T13:34:00.003+08:00

I hate that I love you so much as a friend.

I Hate You.

But yet, i still love you.

My hate and love for you are equal.

I Hate and Love you so much.

Holding Back the Tears

2009-06-23T18:39:00.004+08:00

I practically just ruined a step of my life.

I quitted the band.

Yes, i quitted the band, i admit the leader's really good and all, but i dont deserve to be there, my friends do, they need to show off their talent.

I was really looking forward to it, but something happened, something made me quit the band.

Yes, i admit i'm childish, i have never once grown up. I'm stuck at a level of childishness.

There was never once that things would go like how i wanted it to. It's always been like this.

I've just crushed my own dream, my wish.

At least i was considerate, considerate enough to recruit my friends.

I sometimes dont believe in karma.

Because, you tend to do good things, they never come back to you.

When you do bad things, karma strikes.

Haha, childish now am i?

I can't believe myself really, i thought i've grown, but guess... i have not.

Haha, i've lost everything. Everything.

My dreams, maybe my friends, my trust, my sincerity. Everything.

Hmm, busking in the city isn't so bad now is it? Though i wont earn any money. I just want to sing and play, and make the people around me happy. That's what makes my heart go warm inside. At least i could release the sorrowness inside.

It makes me more like myself if i sing and play, makes me feel like my own world, like in a field where there's wind, blowing only the grass.

I've lost that dream anyway.

Should i depend on my own from now on?

I really did it now didnt i.

I cried again. Did i regret it? Yes indeed i have. Because i'm a child, i've never gotten what i wanted. It's been like this since i was born, why can't i stop crying and just get over with it.

I'm Holding Back the Tears.

Peace.

P/S: My soul is currently empty, it's like im dead. I feel so empty inside, i cant feel any emotions now.

Why didn't I?

2009-06-22T15:28:00.004+08:00

This will be the time, where you guys, especially my friends, can come up front at me, screen to screen, and say that you hate me.

I'm giving a darn good chance for you guys to say this to me.

Because i'm a jerk that's why. C:

Go ahead and comment everything about me.

Whether it's harsh, awful, just come all at me.

Comment in my post not my cbox, it'll cramp up that place.

And i know i dont deserved to be friend with.

I'm a jerk. A loser.

I dont have anyone to understand me anymore. Because i'm a jerk, always have been.

Haha, my friend's friend got that recent case of A(H1N1). I might get it too, you know.

Maybe when i get it, i should just shut up about feeling anything weird, that way i can die, like i've always wanted to.

Yes, i'm quite emo and frustrated now.

No one trusts me anymore.

Where is the bird nest when you need one? I need to be instant killed.

Mr. Grim Reaper, just take me away, i can't be trusted. I'm a jerk, a loser.

What happened? And why am i typing like this right now?

Because something happened. That person changed alot in a few weeks when i was talking to that person. I can feel total hatred and disappointment from that person.

I really dont care anymore, just let me die.

I realized, words are powerful weapons, careful when you use it.

Because who knows? Even the word 'hate' could kill a person. And the word 'love'? Do not use this as you may like, because you might end up hurting the other person and that person could get killed.

Haha, what am i talking about now, i'm just talking plain crap.

I can't believe myself, why didn't i just die on that day?

Why didn't I?

What the heck... why am i crying now.

Haha, I should've known from the start that i dont deserve to have friends, all i really wanted was someone to be there to comfort me, but i guess i cant have that...

Do you guys still treat me as a friend? I just want only that, even if it's fake, i just want only that. Even if you have the simplest idea of killing me, i dont care, i still want to be your friend.

Haha, I'm desperate now aren't I? Lol.

I'm not gonna force what you guys are gonna write in the comments. Write as freely as you wish.

Lol, and i bet, no one's gonna comment, because who would care to type on a useless persons blog.

Anyway, you may begin typing now, if you wish.

Peace.

P/S: Your words stung me real hard this time. Dont worry it aint your fault, i deserved it.

Wow, that took a while

2009-06-18T17:44:00.011+08:00

Yay! It's my 100th post! 8D

And my darling Mizuki gets to be in the 100th post! 8D

I told you she's beautiful in the sketch! *shot*

It still needs to be CG-ed. 8D

Well i dont think i'm gonna work on her char sheet, so this will do. XD;; *shot*

I'll post it up in my OC blog later. XD

So yeah, today was super.

Because something happened to the sounder and all my friends were talking about her.

Which contains stuff that i did not expect them to talk about. 8D

And i thought they didn't have anything to say about her from the begining, but whaddayanoe? XD

It kinda relieved me that i wasn't the only one who's thinking bad about her. XD;;

Oh yeah, guys, wanted to ask, i'm kinda having problems choosing a colour for the Epiphone LP Standard Plus Top.

There's Cherry Sunburst and Transparent Blue.

What colour do you guys think it's the best? ;A;

I can't make up my mind. orz;;

Google for the colour Epiphone LP Standard Plus Top Transparent Blue, Cherry Sunburst's just below. XD;;

Oh yeah, guess what? Nee's now the vocalist in the band that my friend made. >:D

Yay! Since now Nee's the vocalist, we get to take turns singing! 8D

Because i'm a part vocalist too! 8D *shot*

Well, now let's name my friend Maru.

Maru said that if i'm able to get my electric guitar and recruits in time, we might be able to perform in CF' 10! 8D

So now all i have to do, is get an electric guitar, without having my mum slaughtering me and the guitar. orz;;

That's prolly about it for today. 8D

Peace. >8Dv

P/S: Xyn, I'll be doing your tag soon. XD;; *shot*

Found it and Damn

2009-06-16T17:20:00.010+08:00

Ok i seemed to be annoying, but i found it, the guitar that had the same and EXACT body art design.

Here you go, an Epiphone Les Paul Standard Plus-Top Heritage in Cherry Sunburst.

Long name, yes indeed, that is why i forgot the name of the previous Gibson Les Paul picture i posted in my blog. orz;;

I found one in Amazon that cost nearly RM2k for the above link given.

Had a chat with my mom, she wont seem to budge. D:

So i guess i have to rely on my own.

I told my mom i was going to buy the guitar on my own, but nooooo, she just had to say,

'Dont buy it without my consent.'

Like what the hell?

I'm using MY yearly savings man, the savings that i've been trying to keep for a year?

Darn, parents these days cant be trusted.

That's why i kinda stop making promises with my parents, they ALWAYS break it.

So i kinda have to rely on my own. =.=

All they know is to nag and brag about studies and my poor academics, just to get me off the track of my passion.

Like hello? I dont intend on becoming an engineer, a pilot, a lawyer or whatsoever.

I just have the thought of becoming a part time musician and an artist, that's all.

Although it's true, once your hobby becomes your job, you'll suffer, because you wont get to enjoy it like how you always do, that is an artist for you.

But musician, i'm not so sure, they look so carefree, but there are pros and cons about it. D:

Bleah, everything in this world has its pros and cons.

And just a while ago, today, a friend of mine and a forumer, asked if i want to make a band, and that her, was the one who wanted to sell the guitar to me.

I said yeah, if i were invited to a band, i'd be really looking forward to it.

'Okay then, let's make a band together! You'll be the vocalist and the guitarist!'

Okay. Wow, that was fast.

Now i'm the vocalist and the guitarist?

I dont even sing good, i break things with my terrifying voice. ;A;

I dont even have an electric guitar, how am i suppose to get one when my mom doesnt even allow me to get one until i graduate high school. .___.

Well, she did say,

'Lets just take this as a hobby! Don't worry no rush!'

That somehow relieved me by 50%, because i'm currently thinking if i'm actually ready to join in a band. To be honest, i'm actually not that ready in joining a band yet, since i'm still in grade 1 for classical guitar. XD;; *shot*

What? At least i learned most of the stuff from internet, my teacher's too slow, i really really cant rely on him too much, i'll only rely on him when it comes to stuff that i dont know. XD;;

Guitar takes about 4 years. I learned the guitar just not too long ago, about November '08. And once i finished classical it would be the time when i'm already in college? Okay, out of topic.

My friend told me to quit cosplaying for a while to save enough money so i can buy one while i'm still in high school, well yeah i can do that, since i dont have anyone to cosplay in mind. XD;;

But when it comes to PVC figurines.... i can't do it. orz;;

PVC figurines are like an opium drug, once you get one of it, you're done for, you'll want to have more, that's the current situation for me.

For the sake of the guitar, i must save money! ;A;

But i wonder even if i were to save the money, am i able to use it?

Because for sure i know, my mom would stop me from buying the guitar. .____.

It's been like this for years, i saved up the money, and for sure, all she just have to do is use her mouth.

'No.'

THAT word itself would cause a great impact of fear to me. orz;;

Yes, i'm a coward, i obey my parents when it comes to buying stuff, sue me. :C

It's weird, i want to rebel, but i cant. orz;;

Anyway, my mind's in chaos right now. It's really frustrating when you cant make up your own mind, like myself. *shot*

Damn, what am i to do now?

Peace. Dlv

P/S: Life sucks when your parents dont understand you one bit. D:

P/S/S: It sucks even more when a person BREAKS your promise.

P/S/S/S: I can sing 'Tears in Heaven' by Eric Clapton and 'You and me' by Lifehouse now. 8D *shot*

Change of Plans

2009-06-16T16:03:00.005+08:00

Ok, change of plans, not getting that Gibson Les Paul.

After having lectured about that Gibson Les Paul my friend wanted to sell, that guitar's 10 years old, and if the strings are broken, it needs maintenance and maintenance costs alot.

My friend told me Epiphone Les Paul is better.

Now this is interesting.

The sound quality is twice as good than Gibson Les Paul, and it's cheaper than Gibson, by a tonnes.

Epiphone is under Gibson's company.

My friend told me she could get a discount for me in Midvalley Yamaha's.

I did some research and i found they had the same guitar i wanted.

Epiphone Les Paul Standard Plain Top.

Almost the same like in the picture i posted few previous posts ago. XD;;

Here you go, this is an Epiphone LP Standard Plain Top.

Almost the same like the Gibson Les Paul Standard( i forgot it's name, orz;; ) no?

I'm gonna go research for more of Epiphone Les Paul to see any of the body art's design catches my interest. XD;;

So yeah, kinda researching for it's price now too.

Too bad there's only limited Epiphone Les Paul guitars. orz;;

But the good thing is, some of it is below RM1k, from what i've researched, cheaper than Ibanez I'd say. >8D

Okay, Ibanez ART120 out of my list( I still plan to get it though, since it's white and it's almost similar to Rai's guitar, but prolly later in the future. XD;; ).

Gibson Les Paul is out too, due to the massive bombage of the price. orz;;

Epiphone Les Paul, come to mama. *shot*

Wow, 2 posts in a day. D8

Peace. >8Dv

What I have in mind

2009-06-16T14:48:00.005+08:00

Like the title says, wanted to say what i have in mind because i'm bored and is in need of blogging. D:

My midterm results sucked BIG time.

So nothing to comment about.

Just that i need to concentrate on studying alot more this time. orz;;

And when i mean my results sucked BIG time, i mean BIG as in REAL BIG. orz;;

I'm soooo dead. D:

I'll be getting my beautiful Mizuki sketch tomorrow, so i'll prolly be blogging again tomorrow. ;w;

And i forgot to post this sketch i did during Economics exam.

Well, wanted to sketch this pose for quite a long time now.

I didnt want to draw this pose last time, because i sucked so darn much last time. D:

Proportions might be out, i'm not really sure, but i feel like it's out somehow. orz;;

And i watched the whole Kuroshitsuji series and im done with it, thanks Nee for lending it to me! 8D

I was emo-ing alot, and i shed a tear. ;A;

Too much despair in it especially the last 2 or 3 endings. ;A;

It feels really empty inside when you watched the last ending of Kuroshitsuji. ;A;

The exact same feeling like how i felt for Persona 4's bad, good, and true ending. ;A;

Oh yeah i finished the game, again, and now im onto my third play. >8D *shot*

What can i say? It's too addicting. XD;;

Oh yeah, i prolly might be getting a Gibson Les Paul soon.

I repeat, a Gibson Les Paul. 8DDDDD

Because a friend of mine is selling it at a really super duper cheap price, but i think it's prolly a copy version of Gibson since Gibson are the most well-known and expensive electric guitars around.

What price? RM600.

RM600.

That's like super duper duper uber cheap no?

Compare to a RM10k 1st hand Gibson Les Paul guitar, to a RM600 2nd hand Gibson Les Paul guitar.

The guitar could prolly be a copy version. PROBABLY.

Hopefully it's an original version of Gibson Les Paul. ;A;

But till hell freezes, there's no way in the world, A Gibson Les Paul guitar should be at the price of RM600, even though if it's a 2nd hand.

Why did i say i might be getting it?

Well, i haven't take a good look at it yet. orz;;

But she promises me with pictures later on, since she's not the one who's selling it, it's her friend. XD;;

I just hope that the body art's design is what i expected it to be. ;A;

And im begging my mom to get it for me, i lied when i said i dont need my mom's help anymore. *shot*

Hmm, what else do i have in mind?

....

Nope guess there's nothing else. XD;;

Everyday's been really dull lately, so there's nothing much to blog about. D:

Unless you want me to blog about my dog, Teddie, yeah, he learned how to sit and how to high 5.

Like i said, nothing much to blog about these days, LOL.

Peace. >lDv

Haru Haru~ shot

2009-06-11T01:06:00.007+08:00

OH AM GEEEEE *GASP* *shot*

Yeah i finally got around drawing her right after a few sketches.

Drew her a few days ago when i couldn't use the computer due to housing problems. D:

So far i think this is the best. 8D

So who is she?

Check out my OC blog to find out more! 8D

I added L.O.L's Synopsis in there! Check it out! 8D

WARNING:
May contain Shoujo-ai content in the end. Do not proceed if you're not into Shoujo-ai. :'D

No worries, there'll be a point where it'd say, 'Yuri' ahead! 8D

Peace. :Dv

GASP

2009-06-05T21:21:00.003+08:00

Oh noes, a Shih Tzu's in my house. D8>

I'm gonna name it Teddie. :'D

It's got a black underwear pattern on it's butt! 8D

My dad got me a Shih Tzu, but actually, I'm more to a 'Big Dog' person instead of a 'Small Dog'. D8>

I want a Huskyyyy. ;A;

It's a really random case that all of a sudden, my dad buys me a Shih Tzu without asking me. D8

Actually my parents doesn't really like Shih Tzus whereas my mom doesn't like dogs but after what my parents bumped into the market, they both fell in love with it and decided to buy it for me.

I was shocked. D8>

Because i've been begging them to give me a Husky or a Labrador, THEY ENDED UP GIVING ME A SHIH TZU. ;A; orz;;

Trust me, Teddie wont last for 5 months in this house. 8'C

Like all my 3 Labs, not one of them lasted in my house for more than 5 months. <8'C

I CRIED FOR 3 FRIGGIN' DAYS WHERE MY DAD GAVE AWAY MY 1ST LABRADOR. ;________;

IT WAS A VERY VERY PAINFUL EXPERIENCE. ;A;

3 FRIGGIN' DAYS I TELL YOU. >8'C

Actually i've been wanting to post about this yesterday but was a lil' too emo. D:

But Teddie came to my house just a while ago, and darn it's sleeping...and it's a very very noisy dog, anddd i just had to post about it. D:

That's why i prefer Big Dogs. D:

HUSKYYYYYYY~~ OTL;;

Oh well, I think this should be the time where i should train myself to get a Husky in the future. XD;;

....With a Toy Dog. OTL;;

Because i want to have a Husky wearing a bandana on it's neck and i want it to be a female husky with blue-greyish fur. ;A;

And despite the fact that i'm practically allergic to FUR. orz;;

I dont like the fact that i'm allergic to fur, it hurts my heart for an animal lover like me. 8'C

Peace. ;A;v

P/S: HUSKYYYYYYYYYYYYY~ ;___________; VAI DID I END UP WITH A TOY DOG. ;A;

天国から涙

2009-06-05T17:09:00.005+08:00

As Heaven cries,
The rain pours heavily,
Crying out,
It's heart with pain
And disappointment...

As I realize this,
I sat down,
Laying my head
On the wall,
And together with the rain,
Sharing our despair
And pain...

.......

All by Myself, Once again.

2009-06-03T18:50:00.003+08:00

As expected, if it's not today then it'll be tomorrow.

The sorrowness and despair, will eventually come back once they're gone.

...I dont think i want to go on with my life anymore.

Drawing, hobbies, everything.

I just tend to screw up.

Whatever i do, will always end up having someone else being hurt.

Words are powerful weapons that could penetrate once heart, leaving a wound, true indeed.

I tend to say something i should not, end up having people hate me, end up hurting people, that's all i could do i think.

I have no good nature.

I'm no optimistic person, i'm more to a pessimist.

I look optimistic on the outside, but i'm not on the inside.

It's like crabs, their shells are hard but once you crack them open, they're soft inside.

You must've got bored of this, since i've posted millions of emo rants over here.

...I dont want to talk about it anymore.

I just keep screwing things up.

...I want to be alone.

I wish there's someone who would understand me better...

Someone who would understand me better...is there someone like that in the world?

...I just wanna die.

I tend to hurt people.

I tend to disappoint people to no end.

I'd be better off with the dumps.

...All by myself...once again...

Inspirational Music

2009-06-02T21:42:00.005+08:00

Oh am gee gee gee gee baby baby *shot*

Okay, okay on with the topic.

Well, today was one heck of a pessimistic day, until music came running through my ears.

Why?

Because Akihiro Tanaka played wonderous and rocking music with an acoustic guitar today in Subang Parade.

I was a pessimist the whole day today, reached Subang Parade.

Walked around the mall, and around 7.25 p.m i went walking to the event where Akihiro was playing the guitar.

And oh my god, you wouldn't know how good he played that acoustic.

After hearing a few songs he played, all my worries and sorrowness was gone, poof!

I liked 2 songs he played, and another technique he played on one of the songs.

Great hands he got there, it's like watching pure god playing, but of course, from so far what i've seen in Youtube, all Japanese have this great guitar talent like if it's gods hands.

The sound they produce out of that guitar is like heaven.

If you people are wondering Akihiro's 'hawt', you're asking the wrong person, LOL.

But i can say he's cute though. XD;;

After all the songs he played, it was Q&A time.

But i didn't bother asking, until they've said they're giving out Akihiro's books.

And that's what struck me with a golden arrow.

I just had to get his books, it was too good to not get them.

So i went up nervously, asked him some questions, and voila!

His book is currently in my hands, and thank god the book i got was the second last book. They were gonna wrap up the session after all the books have been collected by the people who asked Akihiro questions.

So here i am, happily typing with hyped up spirit.

Oh, i can play 3 of his songs in the book! But not really smoothly though.

Supposingly i can play 4 if only my plain strings were steel not nylon.

Actually when i was in the car on the way to Subang, i was gonna bomb this blog with a super emo rant when i reached home, like all the stupid stuff i used to post here in the blog. XD;;

But after hearing his songs, i dont feel anything anymore, except im even more inspired in playing fingerstyle now, after finishing my classical, im going straight for fingerstyling lessons, or i prolly dont need to go for them, since Akihiro has never went under any formal lessons since he first played at the age of 13, he's 23 now by the way.

He played everything by ear, i envy his listening and original arrangement skills. D:>

I want his hands and earssss. D:<

Here's a lil proof. 8D

If you're wondering why i'm so sad today, yeah, my mom's not gonna buy me an electric guitar until i graduate high school, there, ya' happy? I:<

And a few other things which i wont state it out, or i'll go super emo again.

Well, off to Youtube to watch some of Akihiro's videos again! 8D

Today isn't enough, mind you. *shot*

Peace. lDv

P/S: I'm getting an electric guitar on my own, i dont need my mom's help anymore.

Red Strings

2009-05-29T20:32:00.016+08:00

Very very soft and simple CG that took me longer than i thought.

Doodled everything digitally, then went on with the linearting, and on with the CG-ing.

Mind the perspective. orz;;

The appearance of the brown-haired person and the red-haired girl! 8D

They've got names, mind you. >8D

...Not telling you, bwahahahaha- *shot*

Of all the pics i've drawn, I find this the best than all the other kissy kissy arts, lolz. XD;;

I find this alot more calm than the others, actually all the other kissy arts are calm too, LOL, though i'm not saying that the kissy kissy arts arent good, i just find this better. 8D

Because i find red strings alot more... romantic in a way, lolz. XD;;

And because this isn't over my privacy limit, lolz, that's why you get to see this. >8D

But i still dont post this type of stuff in deviantART, lolz. orz;;

Red strings represents love and being unseparated if it's tied around one another's pinky finger, i think, lol, but i do know that it's somewhat close to that meaning. XD;;

I'm not sure why the saying( i think it's a saying, LOL. *shot* ) says they have to tie the string around each other's pinky finger though, lolz, can someone explain to me if they do know why they have to do that? Lolz. *shot*

Why did i tie red strings around their neck? Because i can, lolz. >l3 *shot*

Red-haired girl's bangs doesn't really look like that, i left it the way it was because it was a doodle at first, and her hair isn't wavy actually, it's naturally straight, lolz. XD;;

...Actually, i think i accidently mirrored her bangs. DDDDD8 *dies*

And this is will be a cover for L.O.L's side story( when i've fixed the girl's mirrored bangs. orz;; ) that i'm trying to work out.

Title's 'L.O.L:L.Y'

Two things that should be running in your minds right now,

What's the meaning of L.O.L and L.O.L:L.Y?

....>8D *evil laughs*

Okay, i think i didn't left any important details out.

So, Ciao~ 8D

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: Todays report belowwwwwwwww- *shot*

Oh am gee gee gee gee baby baby

2009-05-29T16:55:00.005+08:00

Ignore the title, LOL.

Currently high after having so much fun today! 8D

Inspired by Girls Generation 'Gee'. *shot*

Went to Pyramid today.

And so my friends wanted to try on clothes for Anatomi, Xyn asked me to try on one of them too, so i'm like okay sure why not. XD;;

After trying out a few shirts i finally found one that i really like, but wasn't sure if i could buy it.

Reasons were,
1. I was out of cash
2. I wasn't sure if my parents were to agree into me buying stuff that's related to punk and stuff. XD;;

But of course, i'm sure my mom wouldnt mind, since my friends told me the one that i liked, makes me look feminine.

.... Which is what i had a sudden urge of not buying it, since i did recall myself saying that i dont want anything related to feminine. But my friends said it was okay, so i guess i should buy it the next time i go to that store again! 8D

Because i really liked that shirt. 8D

And because it's like a long sleeved shirt, only the elbow part was chains connected to the sleeve, lol i'm bad at describing it. orz;;

Any of my friends that go out with me next time should be able to have a look at it, if i ever bought it that is. XD;;

At least i bought a checkered beanie! 8D

I suddenly have a fetish for checkered stuff. orz;;

So after that we went to shogun, and DAMN the queue was long. D:

Because it was shogun's anniversary or something so they had 50% discount for the buffet. D:

And then, you know, malaysians, as usual, they always cut the line and stuff, lolz, and then everyone was furious because they jumped the queue and they went in first while the others who came alot earlier than them waited outside.

So we didn't end up eating in shogun, we went to eat at the old McD instead. XD;;

Anyway, walked around the mall, and to the orange atrium.

In the center of the orange atrium, something caught my eye.

Drums.

I couldn't resist, i kinda dragged my friends to come with me i think, LOL, but they wanted to have a look around the area too since the event was originally a movie carnival or something, it's weird for the event to have drums, keyboard, and guitars over there, but no matter.

So we went there i kept going near to the drums, LOL, this calls for...sudden urge! *shot*

I asked the guy who was playing the drums earlier if i could play it, he said sure go ahead.

And i played like a noob. orz;;

Because i'm not really good with the drums and yet i still want to play it, sudden urge, lolz.

I think there was a lot of people watching me play though. ._________.

I played so noobly. D:

And after that i gave up, lolz, get up from my seat, and then Cel and Xyn asked me to play the guitar, i'm like, huh?

Because i didn't want to sit on the floor and play the guitar, LOL, makes me feel like a beggar, especially in a shopping mall. D:

We walked around the mall for a while,

'...Can i play the drums again?'

LOL;;

THIS IS WHAT I MEANT BY ADDICTING. 8'C

Oh yeah, before everything of the above stated started, i wore a panda hat that i bought from China to Pyramid.

Bunch of people was staring at me, LOL.

But i didn't care.

I wonder why i wasn't embarassed or shy. Usually people goes real red or just hides the hat away, but i wasn't like that, i wore it the whole day not caring who was looking at me, lol, i only took it off when it was hot. D:

Is it my good nature? lolz. XD;;

There wasn't anything much yesterday, stayed at Nee's house with Xyn the whole day 'till it was 6, Cel couldn't come due to personal reasons, although we 3 knew what the reasons were, lol.

Watched anime at Nee's house for the whole day. 8D

Okay that's about it. 8D

Need to get something done first( CG-ing ), before i post it up here. 8D

Peace. 8Dv

P/S: DRUMSSSS ;AAAAA; I WANT TO PLAY THE DRUMS SO DARN BADLY. ORZ;;

P/S/S: I want to get an electric guitar as soon as possible, damn why are drums and guitars so addicting? 8'C

Finally! + Reports

2009-05-27T23:32:00.007+08:00

Exams are officially over!

Not going school for Thursday and Friday, in fact, i'm going back home for both days!

What do i meant by home? Subang of course! 8D

Thursday i prolly should be able to hang out the whole day! 8D

But Friday of course is a problem. D:

I will only be able to stay 'till 1 o'clock. orz;;

Well everything's fine now. 8D

To be honest, i dont really hate the sounder anymore, sure, i was mad at her before, but she prolly have her intentions in saying stuff like that to me, she prolly wants me to be awake and not laze around anymore. XD

Though I still might have a lil' hate for the sounder, she's still my best friend. XD;;

So yeah sketches will be coming up prolly after the holidays, because my exam papers are still with the teachers, lol, and there's Mizuki in it! orz;;

She looks prettier in the sketch than the other sketches i've drawn of her! ;A;

I drew Sakura too but not gonna post her up, proportions was out and she looks alot older than i wanted her to be, LOL. I was practicing on proportions, wanted to give it a go on flexibility, and yes i phailed at doing so, LOL. Oh well, practice makes improvement, no? ;D

I drew Leo too! In a tuxedo! 8D

My sketching mood was switched on the whole time during the examination week, but i didn't draw that much as i thought i should. *le gasp* My feelings for drawing is fading away! D8> *shot*

Dont know the characters that i've mentioned? Check out my OC blog! 8D *shot*

Since the holidays are here, it's time for some anime and manga fever! >8D

...Or maybe not lol, i'll need to replay Persona 4 again. ;A;

I missed that made of awesome-sauced game. <8'C

OH OH I MIGHT BE GETTING AN ELECTRIC GUITAR SOON! 8D

IBANEZ ART120 in WHITE. ;A;

DOUBLE AWESOME ELECTRIC GUITAR THAT I CAN AFFORD, I THINK, LOL. *SHOT*

THANKS TO MY FRIEND, HE'S ABLE TO HELP ME BY GIVING ME A 20% DISCOUNT ON THAT AWESOME-SAUCED GUITARRRRR. 8D

My mom planned on getting me another electric guitar at a price you wouldn't believe. orz;;

RM488 in a set. In a set, means they have the amps, cables and prolly the strap included.

...I asked my mom, ' Made from China?'. LOL;;

She told me she'll take me to the store and have a look at it first, the RM488 one, lol. 8D

My friend introduced a bunch of electric guitars to me with, how good the sound quality is and all, but i told him that i cant afford them. ;A;

If an electric guitars' sound quality's good, then it'd cost more. orz;;

I'm getting Ibanez ART120 in White because of it's body design( les paul les paul les paulll. *A* ), and i think the guitar's not that bad either, lol, but of course, i'm not sure about it's sound quality either, but i've seen alot of Malaysians online searching for this guitar, so i think this guitar should be good(?). And because it's white!

I didn't like black, because the colour's a lil' bit too common. XD;;

And because white instruments are cool, i can be cool like that. >l3 *shot*

By the way, if you're wondering about the price of the guitar after the 20% discount, it's RM2000.

...Which at first i thought the guitar should cost about RM1k++, but i was wrong. D8

But oh well, need to ask my mom about getting that guitar first. 8D

Okay, nothing left to report. 8D

Peace. 8Dv