Hello.

It's been a long while now isn't it? :)

Even my cbox is filled with advertisements. LOL.

How's everyone doing?

I'm doing just fine! I love my life a whole lot right now.

It's almost end of the year, so I thought I'd update a wee bit about my life right now.

I'm working. In case if you'd like to know, well now you know. :)

And then everytime, as I bump into friends, they'd ask me the same question, every single time, it never gets bored for them. I honestly don't know why. LOL.

'Working? Dont you plan to study and all? At all'

Erm, I hope you guys don't mind but, please, stop asking me that question anymore, please? Because I get frustrated about it real easily. LOL. It's like the topic of the day, everytime. I'm not joking. It's like everytime, I meet a friend, they come to me, and asked that same question all over again, it's like someone hit the loop button. LOL. I get all awkward, frustrated, conversation doesnt last long, goes in awkward silence. Asking me that question is like asking me if I'm constipated. LOL. D:>

Maybe ask me about questions if I'm doing fine? Have I eaten? What am I doing right now? Though that question tends to lead to the above statement. LOLOL. OTL;;

I enjoy my life alot right now, sure, it's hard working but, I've made great friends while working, I'm happy working. Like, really really happy. I don't feel lonely at all. It makes me happy. :)

Back in High School, every weekends was my getaway. Friday nights, was my getaway. I hated Mondays. Because it means I have to go to school. Not in a sense I hated anyone in school, nor did I not like to stay in school, but because the years I've spent in High School, was in pure depression. I felt lonely. No one was there for me. My friends weren't true with me. They boycotted me (I'm not sure if you guys remembered that post, was hella long ago. LOL.).

The process that I have to go through school was, terrible. I felt depressed, and lonely in so many ways I can't explain.

Now working, I actually felt a WHOLE lot happier. I can actually be, well, me. :)

Not saying I'm not me while I'm hanging out with my friends but, you get the idea. 8D;; /shot.

And no, I did not say anything about not studying. LOL. I do plan to study actually, just not entirely sure which course I should be going to, just yet, I don't want to force myself into things. I dont want to regret.

My friends told me well, to try, but what I think, once you've actually TRIED it, you can't go back. It's like a drug. Once you've started, you can't turn back. Well you can but it'll cost a whole lot of money. Stop a course, you're wasting thousands, might as well just go on, no? I don't want that.

I want to do things that I will NOT regret, not now, not in the future, not ever. I'd like to live my life to the fullest.

Sometimes it frustrates me how everyone's reminding me about, okay I'll cut it short, everything money-related.

'Oh if you keep on working like this, you're not going to live a happy life. You're going to be stuck here, working like a cow, and you're still not going to earn much.'

'C'mon, study this! When you go out and work with this course, and when you're hit with a big project, you can actually earn a whole lot!'

I'm sorry to say, but, I'm not money-minded.

My colleagues were a bit shocked when I said I'm not working for the money. Actually I was forced to work but let's skip that. LOLOL. /shot.

And then I started thinking, am I weird? No, not at all. I just enjoy my life, alot more than most people do. That's what I'd like to believe.

Call me a fool. But I did not regret the choices I've made.

I think it's because with the people I'm surrounded with, I got a little comfortable working. I'm always looking forward to working everyday.

I got called a workaholic. LOL. OTL;;

Okay enough with that, so that's Chapter One, let's move on to Chapter Two. LOL. /shot.

What am I doing right now 'sides working?

I'm writing music. And recently I've started drawing again. It's refreshing. :)

I've got a handful of written and composed music sitting in my external hard disk, but I've not showed anyone. Just because I dont think I'm ready, just yet. Maybe later?

And well, about my drawing skills, it's funny how I've improved, without drawing for a almost a year, it's funny. LOLOL. It's true what my friends has said about not drawing for a while, your drawing skills goes up a level right after you start drawing again. LOL.

I actually thought of drawing a manga out later, just for ol' times sake. And for the fun of it of course.

Reason why I'm drawing again is because I needed a time out from music writing, I got a little tired, and because not alot of people has heard my songs, I decided I need a time out. Drawing's refreshing.

I wouldn't mind posting up a few songs of mine but your ears will bleed. Trust me. LOL. But do hit me up if you'd like a listen. Don't say I didn't warn you. ;)

And my sense of writing music is weird, not because it's, well, weird, but because I write it differently than most people do, in a way I think?

I write my songs in a guy's point of view, POV for short.

Not because what you think it is. Really. LOL. Because I think writing in a girl's POV, wouldn't be as raw and pure as a guy's POV would be. Well that's what I'd like to think anyway. And I'm being honest.

Maybe it's because I'm inspired by Jason Mraz, John Mayer and etc.

The only female artist I look up to would be YUI. And YUI it'll always be. As most of you might know. ;)

Why YUI? Check her songs out. It's nothing of the norm, maybe it's because Japanese artists tends to write inspirational and motivational songs. LOL. It doesnt emphasize on Love as HEAVILY as most of the American Artists nowadays would.

YUI got me into music, that is why.

Basically, I'm inspired by people who doesn't emphasize so much about Love and Sex in their songs.

I like songs that EXPLAINS what Love is all about.

Not sex, bed, sex, love, sex, and well, more sex, sex, beats, uns uns uns- /shot.

Well yeah, I don't like house music. ROFL. Don't invite me to clubs because I'll reject that invitation. Be warned. LOL. I'll be honest, I hate clubbing. I hate loud techno music. I'm not a fun person when it comes to parties. LOL.

I like simple parties, in someone's house, that has no pole dancing or whatever dancing there may be, cake, Twister! Not forgetting that, games and whatever you might find in a kid's party.

Apparently, it seems I enjoy kiddy parties. Hmm, I'll admit though, I prefer kiddy parties than adult parties. A whole lot. Just because it's not as noisy. Sure kids are noisy but adults are noisier, with beer, wine, noises of someone else puking and what not. Kids laugh loud. That I dont mind. But adults, you get the idea. Guh. ;-;

Call me a kid, because I'll always be one. I may not be a kid physically but hey, I have the mentality of one. ;)

I prefer my beer, water ; My wine, tea.

I'm a cafe/bar that has live music (basically places that has musical instruments) person.

I do like coffee, but I don't drink it occasionally. I LOVE tea though.

Oh! And in case you didn't know. I have 3 guitars and a ukulele. All of them have names. Yes I do name my instruments, mind you. ;)

Coffee the Classical guitar.
Tea the Yamaha Acoustic guitar.
Scones the Farida Acoustic with a Pickup guitar.
Muffin the Anuenue Ukulele!

Im too lazy to name out their model names, ask me up if you'd really like to know. LOL.

I've made new friends while I was writing music. This bunch of people I've met, we all had something in common, we loved music. But definitely all in a different way. There was a few of them who loved music in the same way as I do but let's not go there. LOLOL. This post would be a whole lot longer if I did. <_________>

In case if you're wondering, they're all online friends.

It was the same for art as well. While I was drawing I made friends in the process.

Whatever I was doing, it was definitely fun because, you make friends in the process. LOLOL. /shot.

All in all, that's what has been going through with my life right now.

If there's anything else you'd like to know about me or how I'm doing right now, hit me up! 8D

I might post another post again but it'll take a while. A really long while. LOL.

See you guys soon.

Peace. :)v

Motivation.

Time to motivate and inspire.

Im banned. Kinda explains it. LOL.

Just to let you guys know Im still alive. I'll probably be gone for a few more months 'till Dec, but who cares, the same goes for you guys anyways. LOL. /shot.

So, have you guys planned anything for the future?

Like what course do you plan to do and stuff.

I've got mine planned out, and things will definitely go well, all I have to do, is believe in myself. :D

First of all...

Well, I wont tell you guys what I'm planning to do, I'll probably tell you guys in the late future. :P

Never told any of my friends too, so that makes it fair!

So all of you guys that will be facing Finals, a.k.a SPM pretty soon, go on a studying spree! No more fooling around!

I wont say much, just a few stuff that I've learn throughout the year, the very year I was once miserable, but was able to stand up on my feet once again.

I've got awesome friends to remind me stuff everytime I'm down, I go to them, tell them about my problems, and well, they cheer me up, gave me really inspiring and motivating quotes, advices, you name them. It really brightens up my day, no joke. 8Db

If it doesnt, well, you're just too engulfed in your own emo world! Get out of the place where it is filled with cloudy skies and rains all day, come out to the sunny side! We've got cookies. 8) /shot.

First off, if your parents somehow stops you from doing something you enjoy, well, dont just stand there, tell them, show them your passion for things, if they dont understand nor would they give you an option or a path to choose, well, it's either you go their way or you go your own way. It's like, would you rather be an obedient spoon-fed pup, or would you rather be a tramp?

I'm not saying you shouldn't obey what your parents might say, it's your choice, your path, your road, your life. If you're like,

'Oh, I'm doing this in order to have my parents to be proud of what I'm doing, I should always go for their opinion.'

Then, what would it be like for you?

Have you ever stopped, wondered, what it'd be like to do something you favor? Something you'd enjoy? Something you'd love to do and wouldn't care if anyone was there to hold you back?

Well, do just that! Go for it!

No one has the rights to tie you down. Not even your parents. Your parents plays the part, the role, where they must understand their children's needs. Yeah, sure, they'll get mad if you do something wrong of the sort, but it never lasts. They love you. They do everything for your own good. Still don't get it?

If you were to chase your dreams, and if they were to destroy it, never give up, it's a way of life, just go for it. As long as something good comes out of it, I say why not! Like I've mentioned, parents will always be by your side, love you, care for you and stuff, no matter what you'd do or what you'd want to be.

To summarise things, rebel. Yes, but for the good, not the bad. Dont be a punk! I mean. Rebel for your dreams if your parents were to say you aren't suitable in stuff like this and should go to this and that instead.

If you have that passion in you, that very intention of doing so, then you're good to go. :)

When there's a will, there's a way.

Never make up excuses, you'll just be pouring more obstacles in your life. Ever thought why this or that never goes your way?

'I cant do that.'

'Wow, you're so much more better than me, I can never be as good as you.'

So on and so forth. Does these words somehow, ring a bell?

Because you're always telling people and honestly, yourself as well, that you can never do so, then honestly speaking, you'll never do so. You'll never get it. You can never do it. You can never be as good as that. So drop the act, you know you can, you know you'll get it, you know you can be as good as that. Still think you cant? Just put in a little more effort. Don't just come out and say I can do it, of course there needs to be a little bit of effort.

Action speaks louder than words. Just do it. /coughnikeanyonecough

Also, never look for self-pity. Harsh reality says no. Never. No one will ever pity you, unless it's something worth pitying for. What will you gain? Nothing. So never ever find self-pity. Be confident in life. Stiffen' up and face reality. Be strong because life's a war, soldier.

Music. It helps. Update your playlist from time to time. LOL. Listen to emo music if you must, but dont stick to it so much, you'll eventually just think about the stuff you do not want, but it will likely happen, somehow. Just change the tempo while you're at it. Like, from emo to upbeat. Dont just jump from emo to upbeat, find something emo, moderate, and then upbeat, well, something of the sort, you know what I'm sayin'. LOL.

Have fun. A very lesson that I've once failed to learn. No need to be competitive, just strut your stuff, enjoy, because life's a lot more easier that way. Being competitive just brings in more competition, and more competition means more burden, and burden leads you to something really nasty. So what if you lose? At least you'd be able to learn and maybe earn something along the way. 8)

Winning is never always an option.

There's more and I'd love to type some more, but I'm kind of tired. LOL. And this whole post is to remind myself as well. And a little thing I've faced throughout the year. Tough times, great times, a plenty. I'm more of a nerd and an introvert in school. But the peeps in school, they never really got to see the real me. The one that's more of a goofball rather than some timid lonely person. ROFL.

I've been called weird one too many times, but I dont care, that's what makes a person different. 8)

I've been called a loser too, well not really, but I felt like a loser that one time. LOL. Ouch. OTL.

Well, time for me to sleep, and wait for another monthly update. /shot.

Ciao.

Peace. :Dv




You're only going to live life once, so live life the fullest. Live, Life, Love.

I say HAY YAY

Yes, monthly blog update it is. ROFL.

I'm bored so imma hop on here and update. 8)

Alright, soooooo wassup peepos?

...okay this seems awkward. I come up here to update but i haz nuthinz to updatez. D: /phails.

It's 2 weeks of holidays! Any plans? :D

Well, for me, it'll be a songwriting spree! /shot. Yes, i am that hopeless, mama aint bringing us kiddies anywhere and no one invited me out, 'cept on the upcoming Monday i'm going out with my peepos, LOL, so i might as well write songs. D:

Hay, it aint that bad, i'm working on a few songs now. And i'm working double hard on these songs recently because of some inspirational boost i have recently, and i wanted these songs to sound good. :D

The previous ones arent as satisfying, and if i dare say it, they sucked so hard. LOL. So i'm working on upbeat-y and maybe some jazz-y(?) songs, something not monotonous and boring like the previous ones. D8

I've always wanted to do upbeat-y songs, 'cept they come out all funny and they ended up being all monotonous and boring. ROFL.

I think this time, the songs will be more, well, developed and more fun to write about, it's a pain but well, to actually make this whole thing work, i'll need to go through the obstacles. 8D;;

So please do look forward to it. 8Db

AND HAY. It's 2 weeks, i have plenty of time. 'Cept for the fact that SPM's coming near and i need to study. Darn you stupid certificate of doom. D:

I already have plans for the future, i've sorted everything out. 8)

The only problem that everyone would face is. MONEY. OTL;;

Let's put that aside for now. 8D;;

I'm going to change my header soon and my blog's name/title/whatever you call it. Need something HAPPEH HAPPEH. 8)

So look forward to that HAPPEH HAPPEH thing, and yes, after MONTHS of not drawing anything, i might actually whip something up just for that header, or maybe recycle something i used to draw then. ROFLROFL. /SHOT.

Well, that's about it. Not going to update for maybe a month, we'll see. 8D;;

Now off i go! Songwriting spree begins! /shot.

Peace. ciao. 8Dv





You guys... just wait. You'll see what's coming up ahead. :) ♥

Down

Wow, this is becoming a monthly blog update or some shiz. ROFL.

Well i'm kinda down today, or maybe just uber down today, so i thought i'd just blog a little something what has happened recently and stuff.

I lost at the Talent thing in school, had fun though. :)

Alot of people told me i should've win instead of that one bitchy friend of mine, but bleh, i dont really care much, at least i've gained the experience. :D

And well, school's the same, the usual. I'm a Loner. Wetoriya wetoriya- /shot.

I dont feel like entering school anymore. D:

Long story.

I've made another song, not long after the previous. Made it all by myself. It's really random, but i still love the song anywho, it's alot better than the previous. 8)

And well, nothing else happen. Oh! I've got a brand new guitar, not a Fender though sadly, i'll probably get that a little later. 8)

It's a Farida D-52NS. Not a really famous brand, but it sounds epically awesome. The sound that it produces that is. It's actually a normal guitar but the store had it customized with a pick-up, a thing where you can plug in the amplifier and stuff. Kinda awesome. 8Db

Needed the guitar because of the Talent thing in school. Although i lost, and well, i cried, but it wasnt serious, just got teary and stuff, but hey, who doesnt cry. ROFL. It's like a stepping stone of what i'll need to face later on. 8)

I made new friends when i participated in this Talent thing. And they were so much awesome. Fun to be around too, 'cept i dont really mix around with them and such, but hey, we still wave and say hi to each other with our smiling faces on. 8)

Well, not much i can actually blog about. 'Cept for the fact that i actually named my guitars because people kept asking me what's the name of my this-and-that guitar. ROFLROFL. /shot.

Ciao. Peace. 8Dv

Hello World

WOW. It took me a while to update. ROFL. But yeah, i didnt really have anything to update with to be honest, i got my ups and downs but i was able to 'walk' through them with ease. :Db

Well, hmm, let's see.

I've made my own original song, with the help of my friend. Like FINALLY. LOL. I've made tonnes but never got the chance to finish them, it's either they're too crappy, lyric-less, procrastination or random stuff you can actually think of. Im seriously hopeless in making my own songs, i managed to make the Chorus, the Intro and other stuff though. My friend was the guideline and i made the song. 8D;;

I came up with the song first and i made the Intro, so i just HAD to show it to her how it sounds like and how the lyrics went since she helps out ALOT if it's music-making, she's good in writing stuff so yeah. :D

It's not really good, but i'm happy with it, i found the flaws but im not sure how to change it and stuff, because if i DID change, it might change the rhythm, melody, and meaning to the song, which it's not good, at all, for me that is. LOL. D8>

But seriously, i have to make an original song, purely made by me, i just have to. Even my friend told me i have to make an original song that's only made by me, song, lyrics, everything. orz;;

Oh, my school's having 'Talent Time'.

...I dont have to explain what it is right? ROFL.

Yeah, i'm going up for the auditions, because well, it's the last year of school, i have to at LEAST join something before i graduate. D8>

What talent will i be auditioning? Well, we'll soon find out. C8

Hmm, what else.

I'm Grade 3 now, i changed my Classical course to Acoustics, and seriously, Acoustics is a serious pain in the ass. D8

It's like a book of barre chords. LOL. My wrist hurts like HELL when i strummed the barres. IT'S ALL FRIGGIN' BARRES. D:>

Andddddd i'm saving up money for a new Acoustic guitar, it might affect my next post as i'm going to be spazzing and ranting all about the guitar. ROFL.

Why am i saving up for a new Acoustic guitar? Because i need one where i can go for gigs and stuff, the one where you could usually plug in into an amp, acoustics-electric? LOL. *hint hint, YUI's guitar*

Why am i not aiming for an Electric guitar now? Because i suck at playing the Electric, i'd rather get a suitable guitar of what i'm fond of now rather then something i DONT know how to play. I pity the poor Electric guitar my uncle lent me, it's been sitting there for months now. *bawls* 8'C

I might go for Electric after a Grade of Acoustics and then i'm switching off to Fingerstyling. 8Db *shot*

At least i'd be able to get to know the basics of all the guitar courses. >8I

Well, how's life?

Life's great! Never been better! ...In the world of the webs that is. LOL.

Yeahhh, i'm kind of a loner in school, unless we're talking about the Music Club, that's a different thing. <8'D

Naw, i'm fine really, about being a loner and all, got used to it. 8D;;

What keeps me up and going, 'nuff said, music, period. dot. LOL. Period = dot.

I dont mix around people much lately, which is bad. orz;;

Because well, with the previous 'friends' i had, i was alot more comfortable with them, but i stopped hanging out with them, bad influence is bad. D8

But the current ones i mix around, there's ALWAYS this weird and awkward atmosphere, makes me all sad. 8C

Gah that reminds me, im sitting with this one annoying girl ever since school re-opened during January, she's seriously getting on my nerves. Dl

Yeah, i dont really have friends in school, just the Music Club's meeting that i'm always and so looking forward to every Friday. 8Db

Even better, my form teacher's the club's adivsor. Hey, it's not bad at all. LOL. She's fun to hang around with, really funny and is the type where she thinks she's still in her teens. ROFL. But dont make her mad, she bites back really hard. D8>

She loves the club, but is a two-faced person, not saying it's bad. LOL. She has her image and all so i can understand. Long story to why i said she's two-faced. 8D;;

Well, i dont think there's much i can think of anymore. D8

And holy crap, it's a longgg update, almost related to music. o___o

Ciao and Peace. 8Dv




I'm getting there
....I can feel it.
I am confident.

Thrill Love

I'm all alone.

But i'll make my dreams come true, no matter what.

I believe i can reach it, so i'll go for it.

I try to be independent, but i've got no one.

So being independent will be the only choice.

I'll do whatever it takes to search for that one dream, that one hope, that one destiny.

For I will make a new path, and that shall be my new destiny.

Even if there's no one to support me, i'll do this on my own.

I'll show to the people.

Who looked down on me.

Salad-tossed me.

Going on a roller-coaster of obstacles, maybe i should.

There's no running away, as this is the path i've chosen.

I'll reach it, no matter what.

I want to reach it, so i will.

I want to have it, so i'll go for it.

Doing all this, would send thrills down my desired wish.

Hmm...

...This will be fun. C:

What?

I never backed you up? Serious? Lol. Think again. Hmm, maybe so. LOL.

You back me up? ROFL. Such white lies, you betrayed me by siding with her when you boycotted me. Yes you did help me up when im down, but you've never ever did anything seriously, you've never helped me up seriously.

Sisters? Are we still sisters? To you i might not be a sister anymore, but i still treat you as one. Say whatever you want but i still do. Even though we dont talk as much as we used to, i still treat you as one.

Useless? Well i'll admit im useless. Indeed i am.

"I love my other friends but they won’t back me up (useless) But I always back them up. Nvm. I ady forget them. Its much better this way. We’ll just go our separate ways :)"

Well, i ate the chilli and of course it's spicy. Lol.

Arent those the words you always say?

Siapa makan cili dia rasa pedas.

Seperate ways? Hmm, up to you really. I'm not scared of you anymore, nor am i scared of your gang.

Of course, if you play nice i'll just follow along. Just dont mess with me, i bite as hard as my dog would bite.

You're with your indian gang, you're a half chinese and half filipino, not being a racist, but you've got chinese friends, have you ever cared for them? Lol, dont think so. I've never even seen you talked to them or recess with them anymore, about texting each other? Iunno. Lol. And you want us to care for you? Go dig yourself a grave.

You love to scold people and sometimes mumble to yourself with hate about a certain person. Cant say it in front of their face? Lol. Instead of saying what's in your mind, you show off your temper instead. Is it really right? You be the judge.

You just love showing off dont you? You dont even know you're showing off, but actually, you do. You kept singing in class, im getting fed up of it. You know how to sing, so what? You know how to dance, so what? Do you have to go everybody's back and tell them how much they suck at doing a certain thing? To be honest, i've never seen you giving a praise to ANYONE before. Not even me. Rofl. You like to praise yourself but you've never praised others. Are you so obsessed with self-praises? Lol.

Every being in this world is not perfect. So if you think you're so darn perfect, get a grip, you arent.

You never say you were, but you act like one.

You told me you wanted to stop talking to her, talk to her less, avoid her. But what? Have you forgotten all of this? After you've boycotted me? All of your words you've kept, are just words, no actions.

If you really can pull a punch on a person, show me. You know how to fight? I've never seen you fight before, just cat fights. Lol. Your fight are just words, no actions.

You keep grudges, you hate almost everyone in the school, cant you just give up and be friends? Why so hard?

This rant is my point of view of you. If there's anything that offended you, im sorry.

My words may be harsh, but it's what i have in mind of you and i need it to get it out of me.

If you are offended and you'd like to talk with me, come have a chat with me, alone. It wouldnt be fair for a person to gang up on one now am i right?

And if you're wondering i still have a grudge on you, i'll state it right here, i do not.

If you're wondering why the long rant, well, i dont like losing a friend, losing a friend it's like losing a part of your life.

I had forgotten the past.

I still have to wonder,

Should we just go our seperate ways?