Insulted

"Hey, just go get your guitar and stay under a tunnel, pull a box where people can put money inside and start doing your thing like those Singaporeans. You dont seem to study and pay attention while in class or tuition."

"Why didnt you follow and quit tuition like your friends did? You're not even studying while you're in tuition. Just talk and talk."

"What finals? You're gonna show me red marks on that report card again?"

"You should stay with your uncle! Your attitude's and his are just alike! Lazy and smelly! And you only know how to argue!"

"I'll tolerate you for one more year, if i get poor results from you, you're out of the house! I wont accept you in this household anymore! I'll kick you out of here!"

...

.....

.........

They never will believe in me now will they?

.......

They never did.

Their words stung like a venom from a cobra's fangs.

They will always insult me with words that stung. It's like this from the very beginning.

I dont care if it was my own good, even if it was, i dont care. They never praised me. Never did.

....I feel so lonely, depressed and unloved right now. They dont have a tiny bit of trust in me anymore, they dont root for me in big exams. I thought i got used to it for them not rooting and trusting me, but i just couldnt bare the thought that other people are getting praises from their parents.

"You can do it!" they'll say. But not mine, ever. I'll never get them to praise me, ever.

I payed attention in tuition and in class and especially on the important ones, i did, i swear. But all my parents could say that i actually talk in class when they actually never went to tuition or class with me.

People tend to change, they dont stay the same.

I tend to sleep in class sometimes, and get scolded by my friends but i know it's for my own good, so i woke up and started paying attention again without falling back to sleep, i tried really hard not to sleep, i did. And if i dont do any of my homework, my friends shook their heads.

...But my friends are just the same. And i dont care if they care for me, i just dont. I tried my best to do everything and both parents and friends...are just the same.

...

........

Peace.


P/S: Crying, silently.

P/S/S: I dont care if they ever cared for me, loved me, or actually being really supportive of me, i just dont care right now, those arent the things i want to think of right now.